Young teens, strings & pubic depilation

[tsunami]

My eldest daughter is just 14 and I've found a lacy string in her room and now a big wad of pubic hair in her shower: suspect we're talking a close shave, and I dread to think how much she's taken off. I don't think there's a (serious) boy in the picture or if this is just peer-pressurised body-angst, but - while I'm no saint and have been around the block myself in my time - I really hate this current pole-dancer/porn shaved pussy trend. Call me a square (and maybe a hypocrite as I do wax up to my bikini line - sorry; TMI but I'm hoping we're all girls together in here - or can at least tolerate girl talk) I think total pubic baldness is unreconstructed pandering to male fantasy... IMO even Brazilians and landing strips are inappropriate for young teens. Still trying to cope with the string (yes, this is my first daughter, and she's growing up, so maybe I have to get used to it. We've had the high heels conversation, the provocative dressing and the make-up one...is this just the next step?)

I find it gutting that such young girls fall for this kind of stuff. OK - once you're older then it's your business, but kids need boundaries and should we and can we draw the line? Given the images they can get access to online - which they can and do, no matter what precautions you try to put in place at home - I'm not surprised they feel under pressure. Yes, I have looked - half the porn girls are bald; most have breast implants. Call me old fashioned, but - yeeuch.

I would've died if my mum had ever discussed my depilation issues with me. I can just see it: 'Darling...about your pubes...' 'Yeah, Mum, whatever: bog off.' You can't! Maybe I just tell her I don't think she should leave big clods of pubic hair in the plughole from a hygiene and self-respect POV.

What do I do? Do I do nothing, and leave it? It's her body...AIBU even to think of getting involved?

Yes it is feminism.
What's the conspiracy?

I'm saying that our minds are influenced by socialisation.
But you can make a choice to fight it.
That's not degrading it's how society works.

My lesbian friend chooses to act and dress like a man, but she still shaves her pubes because she likes the feel :o what do you think about that Krumbum?

Like imnotmymum said, you're saying we don't know our own minds and don't have influence in our own decisions. Your comments are de-powering women. Quite the opposite of what you're supposed to be doing as a feminist I would have thought.

Krumbrum you really do need to seek some help or perhaps stick to the pretend radfems/conspiracy theorists on the feminism section on here. Cuckoo. Weird how strange men sit and try to tell you at times that the moon landing were faked and then you meet the krumbums who think the partiarchy run the world. So you mean it's not the Rothschild's or the Getty's

Cuckoo

Why do so many women wear make up, wax etc if it isn't because of socialisation? Coincidence?

once the is dealt, it's time for me to go

this thread illustrates to me the extreme difference between "I'm alright Jack" mentaility and radical (meaning the "roots of how things come about in a male-led society not extreme) feminism

because some women think they are empowered by their choices and equal pay is sorted, the feminism "fight" is over

and still, rape prosecutions run at 6%

yep, it's definitely over, we can hang up our balconette bras, ladies and give up the good fight

indeed

have a yourself while you read the report about the 14yo boy who got no punishment for raping a 5yo girl because he "was influenced by porn and his hormones got the better of him"

we can spend our time getting vajazzled instead of thinking about that, can't we ?

'fight it' how exactly? By not shaving? So I should make myself feel uncomfortable to FIGHT THE SYSTEM. Bollocks. I think I'll stay bald as the day as I was born because that's how i like it.

Anyfucker I find your comment insulting.

Shaving ones pubes is in no way contributing to rape. Feminism doesn't stop rape.

Nope I'm saying this is how it is and it is important that you make a choice to fight it.
Patriarchy and capitalism work hand in hand so...

it's great we get the "choice" to rip out our pubes by the roots

I expect the "choicey" women on here think prostitution is a "choice" too

lovely

What do you think the PURPOSE of feminism is then secretplace?
It is to bring equality to women and a HUGE part of that is freedom from rape, one of the main aims of feminism is to stop sexual abuse!!

SP, you can choose to argue about the "choice" to rip your pubes out by the roots

like the women on this thread, who think feminism has done all it can because they know some women who have good jobs and "choose" to have shaven havens

I'll look a bit wider than that, if its all the same to you

Some woman do choose prostitution and some don't. Choosing to depilate or not has got nothing to do with prostitution or rape convictions.

You really are deluded and stuck in a conspiracy theory world if you think there are linked but then tenuous links re what your theories are all about cause after all the world is out to get you. The patriarchy is after you. NOT

You have again misunderstood. An individual woman shaving her pubes does not cobtribute to her getting raped (that would be victim blaming)
But a society where women alter their bodies to look like porn stars contributes to the rape culture where men see women as sexual toys. That's not blaming the women it's blaming the societal pressure.

Yawn.... Your nonsense points are quick laughable Krumbrum.

So you can't see any issue with the fact that huge amounts of women are forced into prostitution and raped. That's just 'how it is' you can't look any deeper at it and work out why this problem only affects women and so many of them? Well it must just be 'choice'. THINK, at least a little!

Is it easier to pretend that sexism doesn't happen? Is that why some of you do it? Just keep ya head down and try and pretend everything's ok?

But the same thing could be said about gaming ad the boy who raped a 5 year old. Violent games have been used as a defence in murder cases. If someone then copies an aesthetic from the gaming world does that mean they are also likely to commit murder?

Also does feminism recognise women are never going to be full equal to men?

What? Well the aim is for women to have equal rights, opportunities and freedoms.

Women and men will never be fully equal surely that is glaringly obvious

wow a lot of posts

dunkey

"Yet the culture on the "beach" was to have none poking out the side of the swimsuit, and no underarm or leg hair. Not to have it all off."

So you are talking about something completely different then.

Many women do choose to work in brothels or sell themselves as escorts. Spain is full of legal brothels as well as some illegal ones. The illegal will always happen no matter what. Men will get mugged and so will woman. Crime happens. Some crimes are notoriously difficult to prosecute. You've no chance of getting any property that is burgled from you back again. That's the nature of crime.

There is not a global patriarchy contolling woman to allow crime to happen to them. The rapist no doubt does not give too hoots if he encounters pubes or no pubes. HE'S a RAPIST AND WOULD DO IT ANYWAY.

Well they won't ever be biologically the same no but they can still have the same freedoms.

Are people really saying that it does not hurt to have all of your pubic hair waxed off?

For all but a tiny minority of people with weird nerve endings, that is simply untrue.