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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To Be Annoyed At School

65 replies

hairychesty · 08/10/2011 23:11

When my daughter attended secondary school she was taught about abortion. Dont get me wrong.....I think all young people should be taught about the pro's and con's of such a delicate subject.

The fact that it was in R.E. lessons was a bit confusing to me and to be honest I thought they could have chosen science or something.

My real problem with the school is that they only told the students about how terminations were done and then showed them very graphic footage of terminations taking place. Not once in any lesson were they told why some females had to have terminations and that every termination does not mean that a fully formed baby is being terminated.

I just think with such a delicate subject they should know the pro's and cons.

OP posts:

PeneloPeePitstop · 08/10/2011 23:13

winces
dons metal hat and flak jacket
sits on nearest fence
gets splinters in arse

worraliberty · 08/10/2011 23:14

Is it a Catholic School?

Original poster

hairychesty · 08/10/2011 23:16

No. C of E

OP posts:

Kayano · 08/10/2011 23:18

Same at my catholic school... We had a basic bio lesson for sex ed and then it was all about love marriage and relationships .....

GalaxyWeaver · 08/10/2011 23:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ScarahStratton · 08/10/2011 23:20

YANBU. It's a Church school though, and I covered it at home with the DDs first, as I knew they would be upset.

Original poster

hairychesty · 08/10/2011 23:21

Kayano.....were you shown graphic footage of terminations?

I have never heard of that being done before.

OP posts:

Original poster

hairychesty · 08/10/2011 23:23

In fact was anybody reading this shown this?

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1catherine1 · 08/10/2011 23:24

I was thinking exactly the same as Worral. Catholic schools only teach that abortion is wrong - black and white.

I went to a Catholic school and was taught the same thing and when I raised it at home with the schools teaching etched into my mind my mum asked me a few probing questions on how I would feel about it in certain circumstances and I wasn't sure. To this day I don't know how my mum feels about abortion as she never said only pushed me to consider more than the black and white teaching of the school. Maybe you should do the same?

I think if they showed your DC graphic footage then that would be cause to complain. I wouldn't be happy with that at all.

I agree though... the school did it in an RE lesson so they should have been considering the religious aspect on it now the how to. Sounds like they were trying to forge the children's opinion.

ScarahStratton · 08/10/2011 23:26

I was, Catholic school here too, that's why I had the talk with the DDs first.

slavetofilofax · 08/10/2011 23:27

I can't believe that the only thing that was covered in that lesson was how terminations take place and that footage was shown of it. Not unless they have talked about the subject in another lesson, or are going to in a later lesson.

I think it's fine for it to be discussed in an RE lesson, RE lessons often conating the moral issues surrounding ethical issues and people's beliefs surrounding those issues. Presumably they weren't taught anything that isn't true.

If you genuinely believe that no discussion took place, or will be taking place, then you should talk to the school about it.

Original poster

hairychesty · 08/10/2011 23:31

My daughter left school two years ago but it has always bothered me and yes i really wish i had complained.

I did speak to my daughter about why some females felt they had no other option and that everyone must make their own decision.
She was definitely made to think it was a very bad thing to do and after talking to her over a period of time her opionion has changed but it still really bothers me.

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TakeThisOneHereForAStart · 08/10/2011 23:32

I would be talking to the school about this, to find out exactly what was said, what was shown and why.

And if I wasn't happy with what they had to say I would be taking my complaint further.

How did your daughter respond to all of this?

Soups · 08/10/2011 23:34

You say when "When my daughter attended secondary school", when did she attend?

As a teen, late 80's, I attended a church youth group and we were shown anti abortion video, it was pretty graphic. As an adult I did have an abortion after my 20 week scan (took place at 22ish weeks), it was nothing like my memories of that "education".

I don't think it should be dealt with in just one discipline, it could or should come up in biology, RE, sex ed, any discussions on relationships, health, history!

slavetofilofax · 08/10/2011 23:36

Well, abortion is a bad thing, so I don't see why children shouldn't be taught that. But just because it's a bad thing, does not mean that there are not reasons to justify it. There are reasons that mean that abortion is the best thing to do, but it's still a very sad thing.

I would have no problem with my dc being taught about the harsh reality that is abortion. At least that way, if they are ever faced with a situation where it's an option, they will know all the facts. That puts them in the best place to be able to make an informed descision.

Kayano · 08/10/2011 23:36

No I wasn't and I would have kicked off. I am pro choice. Our religious school just skimmed over anythin unpleasant...

It was really bad. Was a while ago now

1catherine1 · 08/10/2011 23:37

After how I was educated in the subject I intend to not allow my child to be educated about abortion in school on grounds that I don't want her to be misled by opinions being passed off as fact. This is the problem with such a delicate subject being discussed in a subject that is used to passing fiction off as facts. (Personal resentment from my catholic education - maybe state schools aren't like this). It isn't really that they say anything untrue, just the words they use "kill the baby", "deprive the baby of life" etc etc... Emotive language and all that.

Groovee · 08/10/2011 23:38

We learned about them at school in Religious and Moral Education

pollyblue · 08/10/2011 23:38

Have you posted about this before? I remember a post a while ago along similar lines - the poster said that a girl in the class (friend of her DD) had had a termination and was left distraught by the film they were shown, as were several others, it was v graphic apparently.

If that wasn't you OP, then it sounds like this approach is not unusual. Personally, I think the subject belongs in science or sex ed, not RE, but then if the school is a religious-based one, there will be a different slant on things I expect.

Tricky!

Soups · 08/10/2011 23:39

Hairychesty, seen now that it was 2 years ago :) Obv other posts happened whilst I way typing.

beatenbyayellowskull · 08/10/2011 23:39

I see your point and I think the graphic images is way too far, but I also think that if you choose to send your child to a religious school then you have to accept that they will have particular views on these sorts of subjects.

slavetofilofax · 08/10/2011 23:39

Hairy, if this situation happened such a long time ago, how can you be so sure that it really did happen as you describe?

Original poster

hairychesty · 08/10/2011 23:41

The bottom line is that dd doesn't disagree with abortion after our discussion but could never consider one because of the horrific things she saw. Not that she felt that way when she came home from school and told me.

The sad thing is, i had to have a termination many years ago now and my daughter knows nothing of this so when she described what she had seen and how it was done i had to leave the room to throw up. I had no idea how it was done.
Dd also realises that they were wr

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manicinsomniac · 08/10/2011 23:43

When I did GCSE RE in 2000 the syllabus we followed was essentially:
Chistian attitudes to divorce, marriage, abortion and charity
Muslim attitudes to divorce, marriage, abortion and charity
Social attitudes to divorce, marriage, abortion and charity

so yes, lots of abortion info in RE lessons (though I don't remember any graphic images, I do think that is unnecessary and upsetting) but it was fairly balanced iirc.

Original poster

hairychesty · 08/10/2011 23:45

slavetofilofax.....dont quite know why you would ask that?

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