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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Have I made the biggest mistake ever?

45 replies

knittynoodle · 25/07/2011 16:15

Ok Ive just let my DP take my son to my MIL's because Im unwell and I feel like crying. Hes just sent me a picture of my baby (7mo and small for his age) in a forward facing car seat. Hes not big enough for it yet and Im so worried something could happen. Before he left I said take his own, but they said no, my DS's cousins seat is in the car.

I have sickness & diarrhea but should I go and deliver his own car seat?

(I know this sounds overly panicky but theyve done some really stupid stuff in the past. Letting him get bitten on his fontenelle by his cousin, poked in the eye by him, they've tried to feed him stock cube noodle soup, chicken legs and highly salted cheese, and they let him fall out of his bouncer because he wasnt strapped in, among other things)

Do I drop off the seat?

OP posts:
ExitPursuedByAGryffin · 25/07/2011 16:17

How far away are they? As an inveterate worrier I would advise you take it - you can always bame your anxiety or your illness

Tsil · 25/07/2011 16:17

If you could then yes if only for your peace of mind so you can rest.

ExitPursuedByAGryffin · 25/07/2011 16:18

on your illness

Original poster
knittynoodle · 25/07/2011 16:18

They are 15 mins drive but they are true idiots. His sister drives like a moron.

OP posts:
TheOriginalFAB · 25/07/2011 16:19

Has he driven the child in the seat or is he just showing you a photo of him sat in it for his own reasons?

InFlames · 25/07/2011 16:20

YANBU ... Take imodium and drop seat off. Or ask DP to come back and collect it, leaving DS at MIL's?

BabyDubsEverywhere · 25/07/2011 16:23

Make DP do and explain to him that he is letting his child down by not lookin after his safety the nobber!

pozzled · 25/07/2011 16:24

Can you get your DP to come back (without your DS obviously) and pick up the car seat?

Snuppeline · 25/07/2011 16:29

If there's an accident they are both in trouble for not securing the child accourding to the law and a 7 month old IS too young for a forward facing car seat. With all the rest of the issues - personally - I'd never let them be responsible for my baby/toddler/young child. Not even if ill, but I am an eternal pessimist...

Snuppeline · 25/07/2011 16:30

by the way I hope you get well soon!

HampstersDontSwim · 25/07/2011 16:33

I would get Your 'H' to come without your DS to get the richt seat.

I would not drive 5mis up the road with a 7th old in a ff seat -I dont want to cause you more worry, but its really a very bad idea.

HampstersDontSwim · 25/07/2011 16:33

richt=right

FannyFifer · 25/07/2011 16:36

Why on earth would your partner think that was ok?
I would go and get child and just bring him home,sounds like the stress is not worth it.

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 25/07/2011 16:36

Make him come and fetch the proper seat. I can't believe he's so uncaring of his own son's safety!! What an idiot. YADNBU but you would be to drag yourself out when you're not well - unless of course he refuses to come back, in which case, take the imodium as suggested and do it. :(

diddl · 25/07/2011 16:37

Why has baby been taken to MILs?

Can partner not look after him in your house?

(Can´t quite make out who is crap at looking after baby here)

cestlavielife · 25/07/2011 16:38

depends how much the 7 month old weighs - is by weight not age.

  • if he a big baby will be ok in forward facing (9 kg)

Forward-facing child seat
Group 1: for children weighing 9-18 kgs (20-40 lbs) roughly from 9 months - 4 years.

www.childcarseats.org.uk/types/index.htm

moominliz · 25/07/2011 16:48

Like others have said I think your DP should come back for the seat.

Also, why did he send you a photo? Was it just for the sake of it or is he concerned as well and wanted your opinion?

A little off the main topic but is your DP aware of your concerns over his family?

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 25/07/2011 17:00

OP has stated that the 7mo is small for his age.
She is also ill, so probably couldn't go on the visit to the MIL's, as she otherwise might/would have done.

Original poster
knittynoodle · 25/07/2011 17:01

They all are responsible, SIL has a 18mo son of her own, she should bloody know!!! Im FUMING! I dropped the seat at the door, rang the bell and left because I might actually have spat in their faces. Then I text DP and told him he and his sister are stupid cunts and that I'll collect my son when the time comes because I dont want him in the car with that dumb cunt shit faced bitch ever again!

Then I said I hated him.

Wow. Im angry. (and crying now) Sorry for all the cunting in this post!

OP posts:
Original poster
knittynoodle · 25/07/2011 17:01

And Im so ill... its been days [cries]

OP posts:
Original poster
knittynoodle · 25/07/2011 17:03

And I realise that dropping the car seat off seems crazy now that Im picking him up, but sometimes they pop to tescos etc with FIL.

OP posts:
TimeHasToldMe · 25/07/2011 17:03

that is a lot of cunting Grin

hope your bum recovers soon, OP.

RumourOfAHurricane · 25/07/2011 17:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
knittynoodle · 25/07/2011 17:08

I know. All the anger at family in law came out really. They are just so lax with child safety in so many ways. DN has been in alot of near misses.

DP sent me the picture because my son didnt know what to make of the seat and was waving his hands excitedly. He must have thought Id like to see it.

OP posts:
throckenholt · 25/07/2011 17:10

I think you are over-reacting because you are not well. I don't think the text is going to have helped much to be honest.

DP should have used his own seat - but as a one off I wouldn't be too stressed.