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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

not sure whats going on here

46 replies

maypole1 · 19/07/2011 08:57

right I will start at the start, three weeks ago my son wanted to ask a girl to the prom so I said well yoU better ask the mum first because she might not like it so he asked the mum she seemed very pleased that he had taken time out to ask her first,

She gave the green light and my son asked the girl the next day the girl said yes so I talked to the mum after and said we will make arrangements in a couple of weeks

Mean while son has been Saving pocket money to buy a corsage for her two weeks ago we were at the flower shop I text the mum asking what colour the girl would liked she didn't text me back for 3 days saying she had left her phone at her sisters hmm

Then I text her with the details last week prom is tomorrow btw saw her 2 days after she said she didn't get the text and had lost her phone so I asked her if she could send me her address so we can pick the girl up she said she has ny number written down at home and she would text it to me

Now I still haven't received anything , do you think this lady is messing a about Or what

To be honest I don't really care if the girl comes or not but she did agree and if she dose not want to come any more I really think the mum should just say instead of making excuses and then just not bothering

Do you think she is just leaving it till tonight ?

Do you think she or her girl have changed their mind ?

Do you think it rude not to just have
a quite word with me instead of pretending she will text me ?

I have told my son he may be going solo already.

OP posts:
usualsuspect · 19/07/2011 08:59

I think its up to your son to sort his date for the prom out

SenoritaViva · 19/07/2011 09:01

How old is your son? I would have thought the girl and your DS would be organising it between them? Nevertheless she does sounds like she's avoiding you. I'd sit your DS down and warn him today so that he can try and 'get over it' and still enjoy the prom tomorrow.

She might just be utterly disorganised too.

InfestationofLannisters · 19/07/2011 09:03

Is it a Year Six prom? If so I feel sorry for your DS, poor chap.

Original poster
maypole1 · 19/07/2011 09:04

He is 11

OP posts:
filthyfunkproject · 19/07/2011 09:04

She's changed her mind definately and not socially intelligent enough to be honest with you ( hence the pathetic excuses about the phone )
it's not so much rudeness - just embarrassment and as I said, not sure how to handle it.

usualsuspect · 19/07/2011 09:05

oh I thought it was a year 11 prom

still I think dates for a year 6 prom are a bit ott

can't he just go with his mates

SenoritaViva · 19/07/2011 09:06

Oh Year 6, bit different from school leaver then.

I would have thought the mother had the social skills to tell you the. Warn your DS, tell him it's not his fault and he'll have much more fun chatting to his mates than looking after a girl.

hiddenhome · 19/07/2011 09:06

They have proms in Year 6?

That's just asking for trouble Hmm

InfestationofLannisters · 19/07/2011 09:07

Sad The girl's mother is being a bit rubbish.

It was very sweet of him to save for a corsage. I'd probably be adding money to what he'd saved to treat him to something nice.

Hope he enjoys himself regardless.

InfestationofLannisters · 19/07/2011 09:10

Year Six proms are a terrible idea. It'll be dark when DD's finishes tonight so she'll need collecting. No chance of a glass of wine until after nine!

filthyfunkproject · 19/07/2011 09:10

Year 6? - I thought it was year 11.

Crikey - you're arranging dates for an 11 year old? My son is in year 6 and he doesn't know what a girl is yet - ( thank god) and what is it with this American 'prom' bollox -,?

onadifferentplanettoday · 19/07/2011 09:12

I agree with Usualsuspect dates at 11 is ott .I think you are maybe coming accross to the girls mum as a bit pushy about it all. let him go with his mates.Saw some pics on FB this week of a friend's daughter and her 'date' while Mum .Dad and the rest of the family seemed to be enjoying it daughter and her 'date' looked really uncomfortable with the whole thing. Let them be children.

Original poster
maypole1 · 19/07/2011 09:12

12 mothers from his class held meeting last week and booked a limo myself the girl and some little french boy whose english is not very good were not invited to the meeting others either cannot afford the limo or have made their own arrangements

You have no idea about the school gate mafia in my son school

Btw this girls mum is not involved with them as she is new and the majority of the children get home alone now so I am one of the only parents she actually knows

OP posts:
Original poster
maypole1 · 19/07/2011 09:14

Well as she and the french boy are the only ones not going in the limo he thought they could go together

And to be fair he did ask the mum before he approached the girl why didn't she say no then

OP posts:
filthyfunkproject · 19/07/2011 09:18

I know all about the playground mafia - every school has one - I still think 11 is too young to be going on 'dates'

usualsuspect · 19/07/2011 09:19

Me too ...I think the school is in the wrong to encourage bloody 11 year olds to have dates

MumblingRagDoll · 19/07/2011 09:20

Is it possible she has got her daughter a place in the limo? Or perhaps she's been put off the idea by someone? Had second thoughts about dates at 11?

Very rude..

MumblingRagDoll · 19/07/2011 09:21

Our school doesn't have proms but if they DARE suggest one when my DDs are in year 6 I will bloody tell them it's not on. It's far too young. I am tired of seeing my friends little girls on FB in innapropriate frocks!

Original poster
maypole1 · 19/07/2011 09:22

Never mind good life lesson for him .

People can be a bit rude

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 19/07/2011 09:23

If they are new maybe they aren't even bothering with the prom?

Birdsgottafly · 19/07/2011 09:24

I think that it sounds a bit heavy for 11 year olds.

He hasn't 'asked her to the prom', its her prom as well, he is asking her on a date, is there a chance that while she thought that it was cute the DH hasn't been happy and they have been trying to talk him round to the idea.

Once they are at the prom they can sit together, why do they need to go as a couple?

BTW girls no longer need a chaperone, they can go were they like, on their own, especially to their own prom.

Or have i got it wrong, its her prom, isn't it? you said that you don't care if she goes or not, why would she not go to her own prom? surely being with a boy would alienate her further if she hasn't made friends yet?

InfestationofLannisters · 19/07/2011 09:25

It's the added expense that gets me. I can't believe what some people are spending at an expensive time of year with secondary uniform to get, especially if you have other DC of school age.

My DD is going alone, walking there and wearing this with a tiara from Claires Grin

BertieBasset · 19/07/2011 09:26

we had a leavers disco in yr 6 when I was a school, same thing really.

Do people still have discos? Grin

I think it is always rude to make arrangements and then ignore someone so yanbu.

usualsuspect · 19/07/2011 09:27

I can't believe 11 year olds have proms

BertieBasset · 19/07/2011 09:27

at school, I am not large enough to qualify as a whole school just yet

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