Anyone interested in cutting down - especially not drinking wine at home during the week

[Lemonsaretheonlyfruit]

Hi

I'm probably in a fairly common situation on here and have been going round in circles for a few years with this.

Single parent to 2 DC. Pretty stressful job and am on average a bottle of wine a night. One of my parents was an alcoholic and so I am only too conscious of the damage it can do and the merry go round that goes with It.

If I could cut out the wine at home and only drink when I went out or had a friend over (2 nights a week on average) then I think I could settle with that. It would be a whole lot better than where I am now.

Things I know.

I think the expression in AA is 'sick and tired of feeling sick and tired' - I am definitely sick of it all. The waking up feeling like shit. The carbs I eat the next day. Not giving the best of myself to the DC, no motivation to exercise and the subsequent 2 Stone weight gain.

I can't have one or two glasses. I have no off switch. So the dry nights have to be totally dry so that means no booze in the house and no trips to the shop- DCs (Both at secondary school now so easier to nip down to corner shop than when they were younger annoyingly)

I stopped for a while before and the thing that kickstarted it was the v popular 'The unexpected joy of being sober' so am re reading now. It really helped.

I have just had the first Saturday night in as long as I can remember without wine and I feel so pleased and happy and clear today. I'm going for a swim. I need to remember this.

Are there others out there who would either like to do either .. no drinking at home or it could be .. only 2 nights drinking in a 7 day week (well aren't they all 7 days ? )

Had a rubbish day yesterday at work and had wine in evening. Still managed a workout though.
At eating disorder clinic with dd this morning so will see how that goes x

Hope its helpful Hedgehog.

@candycane222 I might give no-alcohol beers a try again. I have only once tried a Peroni one thinking it would probably be one of the better ones to try but it was a bit meek. I would never really think to have a hot drink at night. I only usually have a couple of coffees in the morning, water all day which is probably why I look forward to wine every most nights.

Strangely looking forward to Monday coming around so I can frame myself and cut the drink.

Hope you got on ok with DD @HedgeHogFoxBadger

Hi can I join in too ? I am to a single mum to dc n drink mainly 5/7 out of 7. I believe whether you drink a little or a lot every night it's a real trap and addiction like smoking or addicted to eating fast food ! Not for a second should you feel guilty for your drinking as this is called the alcohol trap, it's made god this reason. I am too on a diet so I've switched to vodka instead of wine which to be honest doesn't taste the same!! X how you all doing ?? Xx

Hi lily! well I managed two out of my three but was working very late on Weds and last night and I'm afraid I couldn't (or perhaps I should say didn't? Take back the power etc) resist a glass before bedtime to wind down both nights - so now there is an opened bottle on the side....

You're absolutely right, it is a trap. There are all sorts of other ways to wind down. Why does wine taste and feel so blimmin nice??? That's a couple of hundred calories I absolutely didn't need. Deadline will be out of the way today, so we'll see how next week goes.....

How is everyone?
I managed last night with 1 can of g and t. Was quite proud but still had alcohol. I was thinking rather than having a bottle of wine a night to switch to having a can of g and t or 2 (I don’t really enjoy g and t so hoping it might help me cut down)
However my dd messaged me when I was on my way to a meeting this afternoon and said she’d cut herself. I really thought we’d got over this and she hasn’t done it for about 9 months. I spoke to her and dressed it. It’s not deep but they are all up her arm.
I brought a bottle of wine tonight 😢

I've drunk nearly every night for the last week only maybe 2 glasses a night but it's gettin ridiculous! So now today I will not b touching it or even buyin it for another week !! How is everyone doing ?? Xx

Hi all, I've stumbled across this post and it has really resonated with me. Can I join, please? I'm a lone parent to two DS - 17 and 11. As my autonomy has increased (ie they no longer need my constant attention), my alcohol intake has increased. What worries me is how I can polish off a bottle in say, 3 hours and generally not feel that pissed, merely pleasantly numbed. I don't generally suffer hangovers - I wish I did. It's what I call the witching hour that gets me. I come home from work, clean, make dinner, the boys do their thing, sometimes we all gather together but invariably, I'm left to amuse myself - opening wine/pouring gin has become what I do. Does this resonate with anyone else? Is it habit?

Hi how often are you drinking ?

Hi pancakes
Yes I do the same. When I don’t have my 5 yr old and my older 2 are at home I can find myself drinking earlier in the evening and polishing off a bottle in 2.5 hrs.
Friday night had wine, woke up yesterday morning with headache and felt crap and the same this morning. I’m just laying in bed wasting the mornings away when I could be at the gym!

This could have been written by me. Tho sometimes i can easily sink 2 bottles and wake up like death currently just starti. G to feel better after a drink on friday. Im not stupid but certainly act like it. I also have no stop switch so would have to be completly abstaining have knew for a while now i need to settle down. Would be great to have some support 😊 and support others aswell.

I need to join, drink too much wine every day. I decided that no wine at home on school nights would be the best rule but it’s half term now

Hi all. Have been rubbish really. Although two nights last week I only had two glasses of wine.

I went to WW on Saturday and the talk was the road to success. Just saying I will stop drinking or I will drink less is a bit woolly. So instead of putting myself under pressure to abstain completely or just have one or whatever, my goal for this week is to switch to white wine with soda. Which I’ve done before and don’t mind. I pour half a glass of wine - usually low alcohol - in a long glass with sparking water and some ice. It’s quite weak but I like the taste. Two of these a night is one glass of wine and as I said usually low alcohol. I have a bottle of normal white open in the fridge from last night so it won’t be low alcohol but will switch to that once this bottle is done.

Alcohol is so bad am still feeling down from friday. Cant shake it! Need to get a grip! Would love to tell people av not drank for 6months and stay that way

So today I’ve decided I’m starting weight watchers and not drinking wine. I so want to do it!

Good night last night for me.

One white wine with soda which I took all evening to drink and didn’t even finish.

Slept well too.

I’m doing WW too @HedgeHogFoxBadger. Had a good day yesterday both food and wine wise so feeling good for the first time in a while.

I failed. Drank wine and feel crap this morning. I am not going to allow myself to do it tonight
Well done peridot!

Can I join you?
I need t cut down big time. I used to have a (large) glass of wine every evening..then it became two. Can't remember the last time I didn't have a wine.
Realised that though I fuction fine, I AM dependent on wine to get me to sleep...
I want to cut back so that I have at least a few days booze free..and back to one large glass not two!

I work in education so am off this week, so seems like a good time to attempt sleep without my wine crutch. Last wine (3 glasses!) was saturday night so I'm two days down. But dear god my evening feels boring without the glass to look forward to. I'm trying to keep myself busy, but still...

My Dad was a functioning alcoholic and I'm well aware that I have tendencies that way so need to curb it now. I don't want to be alcohol free... just week free!

May I join you as well?
Over the years my relationship to alcohol has changed.
Before kids I used to be able to not drink and most importantly not crave the drink that much- true we had a parties some weekends and were getting purposely drunk- but my relationship to the alcohol was different.
Since I have kids- alcohol became my stress relief.
I'm not drinking over the week and not every weekend- but problem is- if we have any alcohol left in the house it is temping me to get a glass or two in the evening- the crave is so urge at some points.
Then if we buy for ie wine or something stronger over the weekend- I'll have two glass/ couple of shots and then quite often, as soon as I get that booze I can't stop drinking- I have no off-switch - I literally get so drunk that I don't remember things.
My father used to have problems with drinking- and I can still remember to see him- but when I'm in the mode of drinking everything to me seems brighter.
I had many embarrassing drunken moments- but still...
I would like to have 1-2 glass limit some weekend evening only.

Hi, can I join too? That all sounds pretty familiar, Medusa! Education work is stressy so you feel like you’ve earned a little reward in the evening, I guess it’s finding something that’s not alcohol all the time, and recognising that the feeling the next day can negate all the ‘treat’!

I’m happy to carry on drinking with friends, and even DP at home at the weekend but, like PP, it’s the mindless drinking on my own during the week at home I need to address. I’m a little bit overweight and trying to tackle that but all my good work goes out the window if I start drinking and then you need loads of carbs the next day and skip the gym! It’s not all the time but if i’ve Really hammered it then it gives me a kind of IBS and anxiety which is crazy to put myself through that!

Ugh, good luck to us all and well done to those who have already made a start.

Dreading friday already, i work term time so have been off since for a few days. Have planned weekend with kids to keep us busy but know theres always time when i can have a bottle or 2 of wine. Dont even know if i want to stop, but know I shud. It makes me ill both physically and mentally. Its just became such a cycle.

Ooh can I join? My work has been so stressful lately and I've been drinking a LOT!

Have rejoined the gym and booked some early evening classes.

Tonight I had a lot of work to do and normally would hit the wine to help with the stress... I didn't and am planning an early start to get finished. I feel good!

Glad I stumbled across this thread!

Third night wine free managed. And I got to sleep ok.. which is huge for me (I average about 5 hours)..went to bed at 12.30 and woke at 7.30 so that was a good sleep!
I need something nice to sip in the evenings tho.. can't drink anything with caffeine in it after 6pm or I'm doomed to insomnia. Had blackcurrent and lemonade last night but any suggestions welcomed.
I've had a headache for 3 days straight which I assume is my body going 'where's my wine?!' but I'm ignoring it.
I'm hoping it will get more natural to not get the wine glass as the days go on.. will have some friday night tho..
I'm probably going to check in here daily if that's ok.. I need motivation!

Aww! Well done! I’ve managed two nights. I don’t feel as well as i had hoped, in fact I slept for ages, prob about nine hours, but still feel a bit done in.

Will aim for gym and dry night tonight. Good luck everyone.

Herbal tea is nice in the evening , especially when it's so cold outside.
Chronic illness and related meds are curbing my drinking , I just don't have the energy for the late nights .
I've got a bit obsessive about sleep now , using my Fitbit to track it .