Is it horrible to make ds walk

[Whyohwhy99]

Am I horrible making ds walk for 40 mins to and from school because I want to avoid the bus?

He isn't walking on his own. OP is going with him.

Sounds very autistic of you. And no, you can't just get over being disabled by a bit of will power. Masking can be quite harmful if done too often/too long. You need to play the long game and not risk autistic (ADHD) burnout. You've got a good few years of parenting yet.

And no it is not unreasonable to walk that far. Good coat, good shoes, umbrella. Exercise will be good for you both. You are not going to get understanding of ND/PTSD on the main boards.

Get someone else to teach him buses.

Good luck!

OP, I'm not going to comment on the impact of your needs because I know nothing about it.

However, a 40 minute walk is fine. There seems to have been a trend for parents recently to drop their DC at high school in the car. When I was at high school this would have been social suicide!! (I do appreciate there can be different levels of support needed at an SEN school) Parents seem obsessed with not letting their kids walk and as a consequence we have much lazier, less independent children. I think this translates to loads of posts saying you are horrible and unreasonable.

All the evidence says walking is good for mind, body and soul. He can change at school if it is rainy and you can wear coats.

Can you have a back up option eg: uber/taxi when the weather is truly too bad to walk in? Although this is much more rare than people seem to think.

Absolutely. Push too hard and end up in burnout. Depends on the cause as to what is best.

15 minutes? That’s a mile or so. Millions of children walk more than that to school. Living within a mile of your high school can’t be that common. The difference for the OP is that she has to walk it 4 times herself.

Have you read the OP's updates? The child is going to an SEN school and isn't capable of navigating the journey on his own yet.

Walking is healthy and I think it would be a great habit to get into for your DC. You don't need a reason to walk. No such thing as bad weather, just poor clothing choices so make sure you both have really good waterproof coats and footwear for the winter.

Similar to me. I occasionally caught the bus home one time I did I slipped down the stairs because the driver slammed on the brakes just before the stop. Bent my coccyx. I had my cookery basket and satchel - no backpacks in those days - think I might have had my tennis racket as well. Then still had to walk from the town to my home. There was always some walking as the buses didn't really fit in with where I lived to get me to school so I had to walk into the town to catch the bus.

Once my brother passed his test he sometimes dropped me off in the morning otherwise I walked or rode a bike - my mother never learnt to drive.

It is incomprehensible to me that people think an 11 year old child walking to school is causing suffering and that it is cruel.

I run and swim too! That’s partly why I don’t always want to walk!

No such thing as bad weather, just poor clothing choices

I agree - up to a point.

Sometimes the weather is just too awful to be in even with the right clothes. We have had several occasions where it has rained then frozen, and the pavements were like an ice rink and just about impossible to walk on. I doubt that most people own spikes and ice picks.

I'm very active.

I would rather my children spend this time preparing for their lessons.

OP's son has SEN

I'm not a neglectful parent.

🙄

What preparation do they need to do in the morning?

Me too, there is no one 'solution' for different needs within ND and you're not diagnosed. We support children with ND to absolutely develop tolerance to difficult things and difficult situations, they wont get through live by avoiding things.

Having said that, a 40 min walk to school fo ryour son is fine, that isnt really the issue here.

Each to their own, she asked for opinions and I’ve given mine. That’s great your child managed to find friends. I suppose it also depends where you live.

She is going to walk with him. He has special educational needs and he goes to a special school. He can't go alone

He wont be 'preparing for his lessons', he'll be waiting around for buses and then on the bus. OP has explained its a arduous journey on the bus which would take the same time.

I think people are really either ignorant of, or underestimating the benefits to walking before work or school, it calms the mind, it provides thinking time, on the way home it provides wind down time, there is a chemistry involved in terms of the left/right dominance while you're walking which is beneficial. Not to mention muscle use and heart rate.

Preparing for lessons happens at home or while sitting at school, its a ridiculous claim.

This is why there is a MH epidemic among children, not wanting a 13 year old to do a 40 minute walk alone, dropping them and picking them up from a bustop? I had a 2 hour paper round at that age on a Thursday night, come rain or shine, I was also baby sitting for neighbours.

What skills is she learning here? To be frightened of the world and to have mum on her coat tails every minute.

At 13!!!!

Well, I spend time with my children in the morning to review their classes for the day and make sure they're on board.

Before you leave the home presumably? What relevance does that have for this thread?

Many children prepare for classes at home before heading to school. It's called revision.

Yes, I agree that exercise can benefit children; however, some do not enjoy it, especially during heatwaves or extremely wet weather.

You do that on the way to school, not before you leave the house? And it takes 40 minutes? And you think it would be easier on a crowded morning bus?

You realise this child has to get to school somehow right? It's not walk or stay at home revising. Those aren't the options.
Not that 11 year olds should have morning revision to do anyway.

Either, depending on my schedule. I drive; therefore, it's easier for me.

I see children reading books and taking notes while on public transportation.

Personal preference. I wouldn't want my children arriving at school soaking wet and uncomfortable.

I thought revision was home work?

But there's nothing ds need to do before school lesson wise.

Ah so now it's personal preference rather than neglect? Glad we've cleared that up.