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Should I raise concerns about my child's diet at their dad's?

32 replies

HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 18:37

Hello
Got a nearly 9 year old. Have 30/70 with dad. Dad feeds dc absolute rubbish ie chocolate crossaints, chocolate cereal, McDonald's. I dont.
Dc is currently 130cm and 34kg and look chunky. Ex is extremely difficult. Do I bother breaching this or just hope being with me and being active off sets it?

OP posts:
beaglescurleduplikebagels · 23/08/2026 18:38

No.

Beachbeach · 23/08/2026 18:39

Oh that’s so tough. I would try to encourage healthy eating and thinking at yourself for quite a while before I would consider talking to them about it as a last resort

GoldMoon · 23/08/2026 18:43

Is you dc eating it because they want to or that type of food is the only thing in the house / on offer ?
Can you talk them into making better choices for themself or to tell to their dad what food they would like in the house ?

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BillieWiper · 23/08/2026 18:47

I think you mean broaching. You can do but if it will lead to animosity and he won't actually change what he feeds her then there's little point.
If you had a decent relationship then sure but otherwise I'd just focus on feeding her healthily at her main home.

If she's overweight it will be down to what she eats the majority of the time. Hopefully you'll give her a taste for lots of wholesome foods and explain to her McDonald's doesn't have very much goodness or nutrition in it. And it doesn't keep you full but can make you gain weight if you eat it a lot.

HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 18:49

GoldMoon · 23/08/2026 18:43

Is you dc eating it because they want to or that type of food is the only thing in the house / on offer ?
Can you talk them into making better choices for themself or to tell to their dad what food they would like in the house ?

They like rubbish food like all of us but that's all thats on offer. His dad took him to McDonalds on consecutive days last week

OP posts:
Octavia64 · 23/08/2026 18:50

Is she with dad 30 or 70?

either way dad is not likely to change. Most kids like fruit so maybe go big on the fruit and ask him to get in some fruit?

being active is also important - what exercise/activies are there?

Backedoffhackedoff · 23/08/2026 18:50

Is there any point? Does your ex tend to do what you ask him to?

he can feed his son however he likes during his time so I guess it’s just about whether he’ll take your view on board

ShetlandishMum · 23/08/2026 18:53

Who would you raise it to?

Who would pay any real attention to your complain about how dad feed the child?

HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 18:53

Octavia64 · 23/08/2026 18:50

Is she with dad 30 or 70?

either way dad is not likely to change. Most kids like fruit so maybe go big on the fruit and ask him to get in some fruit?

being active is also important - what exercise/activies are there?

30 percent with dad. No exercises with him. With me swimming, footy, bike rides, park. He will eat pineapple and grapes that's about it.

OP posts:
HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 18:54

ShetlandishMum · 23/08/2026 18:53

Who would you raise it to?

Who would pay any real attention to your complain about how dad feed the child?

Edited

His dad ?

OP posts:
HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 18:54

Backedoffhackedoff · 23/08/2026 18:50

Is there any point? Does your ex tend to do what you ask him to?

he can feed his son however he likes during his time so I guess it’s just about whether he’ll take your view on board

No he deliberately makes life difficult.

OP posts:
TaraRhu · 23/08/2026 18:55

He's with you most of the time. I'd leave it. Encourage your son to be healthy and maybe he will say something to his dad

ShetlandishMum · 23/08/2026 18:56

HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 18:54

His dad ?

You think it would do any difference?

Myfridgeiscool · 23/08/2026 18:56

Completely pointless raising a concern; no one will care about this, the bar is very low: as long as he’s being fed, quality seems irrelevant.
Feed a healthy diet while they’re in your care; teach him why this is good for him.
Can you tell I’ve been there, done that?
DD used to arrive at mine desperate for strawberries!

HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 18:57

ShetlandishMum · 23/08/2026 18:56

You think it would do any difference?

No

OP posts:
ShetlandishMum · 23/08/2026 18:57

HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 18:54

No he deliberately makes life difficult.

He might think the same about you. You can't do anything about what food dad is serving the child.

Theunamedcat · 23/08/2026 18:57

I wouldn't bother raising it

SewYellowLikeButter · 23/08/2026 19:00

During his time it’s his time to parent as he sees fit. If you don’t have a good relationship he won’t listen to you anyway.

spritzwiththat · 23/08/2026 19:01

If you raised it with me as his Dad I’d laugh and tell you to F off with trying to control my parenting in my time.

labamba007 · 23/08/2026 19:02

I know it’s not ideal. But could you teach your child how to order better from McDonald’s - chicken nuggets and carrot sticks.

Could they ask for toast instead of chocolate cereal? And explain the importance of eating healthy. I know it’s a lot to put on your dc but I imagine your ex won’t be helpful.

HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 19:06

ShetlandishMum · 23/08/2026 18:57

He might think the same about you. You can't do anything about what food dad is serving the child.

Edited

Yeah maybe but im not the one who barely saw my kid for 3 years so yeah

OP posts:
ShetlandishMum · 23/08/2026 19:06

labamba007 · 23/08/2026 19:02

I know it’s not ideal. But could you teach your child how to order better from McDonald’s - chicken nuggets and carrot sticks.

Could they ask for toast instead of chocolate cereal? And explain the importance of eating healthy. I know it’s a lot to put on your dc but I imagine your ex won’t be helpful.

In real life would a child do this?

HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 19:07

spritzwiththat · 23/08/2026 19:01

If you raised it with me as his Dad I’d laugh and tell you to F off with trying to control my parenting in my time.

Ok well he can treat his oncoming low self esteem and diabetes then cant he ?

OP posts:
Backedoffhackedoff · 23/08/2026 19:08

HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 19:07

Ok well he can treat his oncoming low self esteem and diabetes then cant he ?

Why would he have low self esteem and diabetes?! Come on.

ShetlandishMum · 23/08/2026 19:11

HulkHogansHair · 23/08/2026 19:07

Ok well he can treat his oncoming low self esteem and diabetes then cant he ?

Come on. He will do fine.

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