Anyone else feel like they can’t switch off without wine?

[Bumblebee2345]

Hey ladies, this is anonymous honestly because I’m so embarrassed 😞 I’ve been drinking a bottle of wine every night since around 2017 and honestly I’ve had enough! This isn’t me making excuses, I just want to know if anyone else is like me. I’m so highly strung and I absolutely cannot stand being bored, my brain is constantly on the go and I genuinely don’t know how to chill out in the evening without a glass of wine. I did Dry January this year and honestly I drove my whole household insane 😂 I’ve tried everything from working out, puzzles, watching TV, doom scrolling, keeping busy etc and nothing seems to switch my brain off.

I work 2 jobs, have a successful business, 3 kids, 2 dogs and 1 husband 😂 We’re not in the best place at the moment for different reasons and even he has said if I stopped drinking it would probably end our marriage. My dad was exactly the same, so I do wonder if I’ve just picked this up from him or if I’m actually dependent on it now. I know a bottle every night is a lot and I really want to stop, I’m just scared because I honestly don’t know what I’ll do with myself in the evenings. Has anyone else been like this and actually managed to stop? 😞❤️

The problem with these threads is other heavy drinkers always say there isn't a problem.

The OP is drinking 3-4 times the weekly limit, is binge drinking every day and has no alcohol free days.

Well, first you have to acknowledge that you have to deal with serious alcohol dependence really, not just 'give up drinking'. A bottle of wine every night for 9 years? That is alcoholism. Please don't take this the wrong way, but you seem to be in denial of it.

Plus it's so bad for the body, particularly the female body. What is the current guidance, I know it is far less than the safe limit for men.

Hahahaha. MN bingo!!!

A bottle every night is concerning. 14 units max per week with some alcohol free days is the recommendation by the NHS. Seeking support sounds like a good idea and I wish you the best of luck.

235 days today no wine.. I used to sink a bottle a night. Now the smell makes me feel sick 🥴 it’s a game changer!

No-one gets severe withdrawal from drinking solely in the evening because she’s not drinking for about 16 hours straight a time. If it were the case she’d be at risk of getting severe withdrawal she would be waking up shaking and needing to drink then. Educate yourself, you’re very ignorant about this.

Plus going to the doctor has resulted in people getting driving bans and life insurance issues. Many many people drink at these levels.

Congratulations, it won't have been easy.

Yes, many people drink at these levels. That’s why there are around 8000 alcohol-specific and 22000 alcohol-related deaths a year.

You sound like me when I was self medicating ADHD. May I present to you: online gaming. Continuous dopamine hit that stops divorces and makes life without wine possible.

I’ve tried I’m just not way inclined! But happy to try any recommendations 💜

No. I wonder if it’s worth going to the GP who may be able to signpost you to something. Isn’t Mounjaro supposed to help with alcohol cravings as well?

Honestly I occasionally fancy a beer or glass of wine, but a whole bottle would kill me, I just about never would even want that much. Do you not have to drive anywhere? That’s the limiter for my husband, who will happily down 8-10 pints on Fridays/Saturdays but not in the week because of work/driving…
Good luck..,

I used to drink 2 bottles over Fri-Sun. Pizza on a Friday and wine. Then my 18 yr old son passed his test in April and I haven’t had a drink at home since then.

being menopausal and worried about things, my inner voice says “don’t drink” just incase he broke down, had an accident…

im not one for going out out anywhere, and ive had a glass of wine with my daughter in uni, and DS was with us so i was chilled, but just the one and TBH i didn’t really enjoy it.

i know i wont go on like this, im not teetotal neither. But i aint bothered anymore.

it affected my sleep and i love a good night sleep so it was also a factor for stopping.

i love water, non alcoholic lager and bought myself a nice china cup for my tea🤣

Yes, my Father, a functioning alcoholic drinks at this level. Hes addicted and can't stop despite several hospital stays with multiple doctors telling him his liver is failing.

I'm guessing you drink at this level which is why you are so determined to normalise it.

You do you but don't give people dangerous advice.

The hypocrisy of calling ME ignorant. Ffs

I used to do very similar for a very long time. Then I decided to just drink at weekends, and that was actually worse. I can’t just drink one.

I tried loads of things. I really struggled with sobriety.

I decided to stop altogether in April, and see what happened. It was easy somehow.
Now I don’t miss it at all.
I had a really stressful day yesterday, and remembered that my old solution was wine.

Not sure why it’s easy now, and wish I could figure it out.
I did decide to start outdoor barefoot walking, at the same time I would usually drink wine. Gave me something else to do.
I’m feeling way better in the mornings now.

@Bumblebee2345I’m exactly the same. Want to stop cause it makes me out weight on in my tummy. Recently diagnosed with adhd and the wine seems to stop the noise for a bit. Not sure what else to do

It’s because you drink a bottle of wine a night. I was drinking much more than that. I stopped 3 years ago. I now find it very easy to switch off. I’m a very relaxed person. I’ve had the best holidays ever sober in these past few years. I truly come back refreshed. My lifelong insomnia is gone. I’m fairly late perimenopause now, don’t even need HRT. I feel great. It’s the alcohol that’s making you feel this way.

My very first thought was ADD/ADHD.
See your doctor asap and tell her everything.
You need as assessment and support now.
Your partner can do one with comments and an attitude like his.

I habitually drink a gin and tonic of an evening as a way to unwind but I do limit it to one. Someone remarked that this is alcoholism, I disagree. In our house a bottle of wine is 3 glasses. Maybe try cutting down buy the mini bottles?

@Mixymaxymoxy this is a helpful post without judgement. As an habitual early start wine drinker myself....taking the water idea very much on board ! the fact I can have delivered within 15 minutes if I didn't get out to the shops doesn't help tbf 🥺

To be fair probably but it didn’t go away in January not for the entire month. I’ve just always been this way. Like since I could remember even before when my kids were small. Even when I was a child/teen, this is a little deep but my mum used to buy prescription sleeping tablets when I was little and give me half some nights when her patience had run out! 🤦🏼‍♀️ I’ve always been too much my entire life I’ve been told calm down, your too loud, sit still and I physically can’t.

Good grief @Bumblebee2345 that's quite the backstory ! Yes get thee to the GP as your body / mind has been conditioned to need 'blotto'. What a thing for your mum to do ! I am really careful around zopiclone as I know I could come to rely on it really easily (but you also shouldn't drink with it, which I have) One deterrent has been brutal hangovers which does temper my alcohol intake, but I am not young and they def get worse.....get yourself some proper care OP 💐

Yeah I’ve tried with the zopiclone before but they will only give me 5 day course. I spoke to a couple of friends and they have said try some codeine to chill me out but I’d really like to not replace it with another substance. Xxx

ADHD

Name changed to my former alcoholic name.

I was on 2/3 bottle Mon-Fri and a bottle and a half at the weekend and dreaded being on call at work as I had to stay under the driving limit even though technically I was supposed to completely abstain.

Both my parents were alcoholics so you think I’d know better?

I used to drink the majority of my calories and ended up with a BMI of 42. I started Mounjaro for help with weight loss but it’s really helped with my alcohol intake and can now take it or leave it and have one glass on a Saturday night.

It’s been a game changer for me health wise and hopefully I’ll live longer than my parents now.

Why do you say that?

I ask, as I have every ADHD trait known to man.