Should I tell mum my brother borrows from her account?

[Cheesestrawz]

Hi,
I have a dilemma

. Brother and I manage our mums finances. She has capacity mentally but she struggles with other health issues so asks us to sort out anything finance related. She’s fortunate to have quite a healthy amount of money saved.
my issue is that my brother sometimes borrows from her account without asking. He always repays it but I think it’s wrong.
his view has that mum has lent him money before and told him that he can always borrow. I know this is true but it’s the not asking that I don’t like. He says she would stress over it and would just try and give him the money.
I’ve told him that it cannot happen again. Do I tell mum?
I

In that case wouldn’t she be aware he was borrowing cash anyway.

if not, i would still let her know.

As long as your sure it goes back and him borrowing it dose t leave her unable to have her quality of lifestyle . If you know for sure sne would be happy to lend him it aslong as it's repaid I dont see the issue. I also don't see his issue with asking her when. She would likely agree anyway 🤷 . completely different if it wasn't repaid or mum wasnt the type of person to agree . Think you have to use your own judgement here op .I'd see nothing wrong with it give. It's always repaid and mum isn't left without .

No - it says that OP and her brother look
after the finances as their mum has health issues, so it appears that she doesn’t look at her accounts.

But she HAS given permission for the brother to borrow money AND he always pays it back so I’m not sure what OP would be telling her mum that she doesn’t know and consent to anyway.

I'm sure when she said he could borrow money from her that at least he would ask first.

Do either of you have POA?

Why does he need to keep borrowing from her?

I think you should refresh the 'it's ok to borrow' statement at the least, but if I was him I would stop doing this as it puts him at risk of being accused of financial abuse even if your mum is currently able and happy to make this decision.

Yes. Absolutely.

he needs to ask her, every time.

i am currently dealing with an estate where the child started out like this, then as their parent got less able to manage took more and more until they had taken over £100k. They had removed their other sibling from POA as it was “easier” if just one of them managed.

make sure you always have access if he does. Willing to bet he’s only repaying because he knows you can see if he doesn’t.

but yes, if she’s competent he need permission. If she isn’t she can’t consent so he can’t be borrowing.

Yea