You know you've been on Mumsnet too long when...

[WhatIfWhatIf]

... your six year old comes out with the line, 'Mummy, did you mean to be so rude?'

(In my defence, I wasn't actually rude, just chivvying with a little more enthusiasm than usual, which they were clearly not impressed by!)

You go to the supermarket and see someone in parent and park with no kids.

You pass a couple in a restaurant and hear the man compliment the woman and your first thought is that she is being love bombed.

You accidently say ‘how’s your DC?’ when asking someone about their children!

There’s a list in the bottom of your trolly and your first thought is chat or aibu

When my husband says “ see what mumsnet thinks( about,y,z)

You start calling your salad a big salad.

You just know half the threads on here in the last couple of weeks are totally made up.

How am I going to make 6 meals out of this chicken 🐔

You start planning diagrams of inconsiderate parking

Someone says "give your head a wobble" and you lock eyes and they know they've outed themselves as a fellow viper.

When your reaction to a normal yet unpleasant situation is to report it to the police

When someone in real life mentions a car parked in the wrong place, you ask for a diagram.

When your husband doesn't appear to do his fair share of housework that week and you think 'wait to the mners hear about this - no energy due to a secret family'

When a situation crops up and your first thought is, I wonder if anyone ever started a thread about this on MN!

When instead of writing your husband's name in a text to a friend, you find yourself writing "DH", and then frantically tapping the back button.

When you plan a piccy tea with naice ham. And yes No is a complete sentence. No?

When you have a mysterious friend who recommends helpful things but really you just read it on Mumsnet.

When you have a RL conundrum and to resolve it you ask yourself what MN would come up with in Chat or AIBU and which responses you'd go with

When you can hear everyone telling you to LTB! And they’re right! And you know it!

You too? 😂

I swear I've nearly outed myself as a MNer so many times now. 😂 I even caught myself thinking of him as DH once, and logged out for the day!

When your husband fails to unload the dishwasher and you think, just ltb

Massive, surely 😉

You mean you've decided that they're made up because it's NEVER HAPPENED TO YOU

You write YANBU on ranty FB threads about dog poo