Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Persuade me to go out tonight

27 replies

SatelliteStomper · 09/09/2023 17:37

I have been invited to a party tonight. I was looking forward to going all week but now it's here I can't be bothered and am on the verge of not going.

It's a 15 min walk away. I can always just leave. It could be fun. I don't know many people going. I can't be arsed to get showered, changed. I don't know what to wear. It's hot. There's wine in the fridge and netflix on the TV. I watch netflix and drink wine most Saturday nights. It's a lovely evening. It's too hot to go out. I might meet some interesting people. I don't want to socialise tonight.

Gaaaah! I always do this! Should I go out or not?

OP posts:
Flippingflamingo · 09/09/2023 17:38

Go and come home when you’ve had enough.

SuffolkUnicorn · 09/09/2023 17:39

Go

Gemzee · 09/09/2023 17:39

I find these nights are normally/can be some of the best. Just go and leave early if you're bored - best of both worlds 😊

TheWrenTheWren · 09/09/2023 17:39

You should go. If you're not enjoying it after an hour, leave, go home, and do the wine and Netflix thing. Wine and Netflix are always, there, though, and you say yourself that's what you usually do. Do something different.

mynameiscalypso · 09/09/2023 17:41

I'd go for a bit and then come home and order a massive pizza, have a glass of wine and stay up a bit too late watching TV

NameChangedToProtectInnocentSmoothie · 09/09/2023 17:41

Remember how you met all your friends. At some point they were strangers. Unless you want to be a hermit it does matter to make the most of social occasions.

Moveoverdarlin · 09/09/2023 17:41

Go go go! I haven’t had a night out in years, I’d give my right arm to get dolled up, speak to the opposite sex, have a drink in the sunshine, chat to new people. It’s a glorious day and as I was driving through a busy, bustling market town near me I thought how much I would love to be out on the razz tonight. We have long shitty winters, get out, enjoy it, come home and watch Netflix later.

Original poster
SatelliteStomper · 09/09/2023 17:43

That's a good point about shitty winters.

There will be dancing. I've not danced (in front of other people!) for years...

OP posts:
TheWrenTheWren · 09/09/2023 18:02

SatelliteStomper · 09/09/2023 17:43

That's a good point about shitty winters.

There will be dancing. I've not danced (in front of other people!) for years...

Well, you're walking home, so get take the edge off with a glass of wine? Or just channel your teenage self and sway moodily with your eyes glued to your shoes.

(Actually, that was my teenage self...)

Moofart · 09/09/2023 18:06

I'm the wrong person to advise as I wouldn't want to go either! 🤣 Why do you think you should go?

AuntieDolly · 09/09/2023 18:08

Sounds great - I've had a year of saying yes for my 60th and have enjoyed everything I'd have previously avoided. Life's too short. Come home if it's crap xx

JustWhatWeDontNeed · 09/09/2023 18:10

You should go, though I'd feel exactly the same as you. I hate going out but I stay in an unhealthy amount.

You can be home in 15 minutes.

GreyCarpet · 09/09/2023 18:13

Oh I know this feeling well!

This is what I would tell myself (am telling myself!) about going out tonight.

  1. I'll have a shower anyway. It's really hot and I'll feel better. Then I can choose whether to go out or not.
  1. If I go out, I'll go out 'for an hour'. That way, I've already given myself permission to leave.
  1. I don't need to make a huge effort appearance wise, after all, I'm only popping out for an hour. So that's one thing sorted.
  1. I'll either be home and in bed by 10 or staggering back at 1am having had an unexpectedly great time.
GreyCarpet · 09/09/2023 18:14

Moveoverdarlin · 09/09/2023 17:41

Go go go! I haven’t had a night out in years, I’d give my right arm to get dolled up, speak to the opposite sex, have a drink in the sunshine, chat to new people. It’s a glorious day and as I was driving through a busy, bustling market town near me I thought how much I would love to be out on the razz tonight. We have long shitty winters, get out, enjoy it, come home and watch Netflix later.

I think you should be planning a night out!

Emdubz · 09/09/2023 18:16

SatelliteStomper · 09/09/2023 17:37

I have been invited to a party tonight. I was looking forward to going all week but now it's here I can't be bothered and am on the verge of not going.

It's a 15 min walk away. I can always just leave. It could be fun. I don't know many people going. I can't be arsed to get showered, changed. I don't know what to wear. It's hot. There's wine in the fridge and netflix on the TV. I watch netflix and drink wine most Saturday nights. It's a lovely evening. It's too hot to go out. I might meet some interesting people. I don't want to socialise tonight.

Gaaaah! I always do this! Should I go out or not?

Here to empathise. My other half is a DJ and is upstairs practicing his mix for a bar he’s playing at tonight and I’m lying on the couch thinking how much I want to stay in. I know I’ll be fine once I get out but right now the thought of having a shower and picking an outfit feels like such an effort 😂

Bobbotgegrinch · 09/09/2023 18:18

I always promise myself a reward for going. If I go to this thing then I give myself permission to have a lie in till 11 tomorrow without feeling guilty, or I can buy that big chocolate bar etc.

LookatEsa · 09/09/2023 18:19

If you have agreed then barring illness etc it would be pretty rude not to at least go for a bit. Someone has taken the trouble to invite you and prepare. Netflix will be there after if you want.

Original poster
SatelliteStomper · 09/09/2023 18:23

Moofart · 09/09/2023 18:06

I'm the wrong person to advise as I wouldn't want to go either! 🤣 Why do you think you should go?

Because I stay in a lot, and I quite often flake out on doing stuff that I'd probably enjoy if I made a bit of effort.

I'm getting older and I don't want to become an old boring shut-in who never does fun stuff anymore.

Also, dh is clearly hoping for a night in front of the TV on his own 😂

OP posts:
Original poster
SatelliteStomper · 09/09/2023 18:24

LookatEsa · 09/09/2023 18:19

If you have agreed then barring illness etc it would be pretty rude not to at least go for a bit. Someone has taken the trouble to invite you and prepare. Netflix will be there after if you want.

Absolutely no one would miss me if I didn't go!

OP posts:
ColouringPencils · 09/09/2023 18:24

As soon as I have an event I have agreed to, I start hoping it will be cancelled. There is nothing as welcome as cancelled event, even with people I really want to see. But I think you should go and you will actually have fun. If it's awkward, you are home in 15 mins with your wine already chilled. Get in the shower, get some tunes on, have a great night. Do it for those of us facing yet another Saturday night in!

LookatEsa · 09/09/2023 18:57

SatelliteStomper · 09/09/2023 18:24

Absolutely no one would miss me if I didn't go!

Show quote history

But what if each individual thinks that?

ssd · 09/09/2023 19:40

ColouringPencils · 09/09/2023 18:24

As soon as I have an event I have agreed to, I start hoping it will be cancelled. There is nothing as welcome as cancelled event, even with people I really want to see. But I think you should go and you will actually have fun. If it's awkward, you are home in 15 mins with your wine already chilled. Get in the shower, get some tunes on, have a great night. Do it for those of us facing yet another Saturday night in!

Totally agree. I love a cancelled nightBlush

WonkyDesk · 09/09/2023 19:43

Sod it, go!
I would anyway 😜

ssd · 09/09/2023 22:43

Wonder if she's still outGrin

CeriB82 · 09/09/2023 23:24

Did you go OP?

i went last night. Really didn’t want to go. Just a meal and few drinks (don’t really drink and do pubs in town. Last time I went was Nov 22. Went and it was dead. Seriously dead. Did not enjoy myself. We all went hone 10:15

Tonight was much better. Mountain walk to see the sunset and a cold glass of water! Perfect!