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Original poster

Useless household articles

84 replies

TheHauntedPencilCase · 08/01/2023 15:12

I admit I'm having a bad day, partly provoked by not being able to find the 4 packs of discounted Christmas cards I bought in Monday having had to pay a fortune last minute this Christmas.
Anyway I also acquired a melon baller and sat down to enjoy my healthy fruit based lunch but rather than creating delightfully delicate bubbles of melon I ended up with wet strips of melon. It may well have been my technique but I'm blaming the bastarding melon baller. Tell me what arsehole household articles you have had to grapple with recently. Also if you know what I did with the cards please share.....

OP posts:
Mossstitch · 09/01/2023 19:32

DelurkingAJ · 09/01/2023 14:30

@Mossstitch I have one and adore it. The trick to get the cork out is to hold her arms down and keep turning…the cork then twists right off the corkscrew.

Thank you, think I've tried that but will try again next time.............. Have to admit I've resorted to screw tops😂

Original poster
TheHauntedPencilCase · 10/01/2023 22:32

I've had to Google pasta stirrer!

OP posts:
ThePug · 10/01/2023 23:53

Were you using the melon baller like an ice cream scoop, dragging it across the flesh? You're just meant to dig it in and rotate it to create a ball, so in the end you have the skin left with lots of craters in it. I think, I don't own one but remember doing it once, possibly with my grandmother.

Misty666 · 11/01/2023 00:48

Love this......i have a tempremental iron, a cooker that is in a bad mood and refuses to work, a washing machine that needs coaxed into life and i recently nearly sliced my thumb off due to a lack of a corkscrew. But...i have one heck of a cherry de-seeder.....if that's even the technical term ? haha

GoT1904 · 11/01/2023 00:51

Fucking tuppawear.

Bigslippers · 11/01/2023 00:59

Teeny frying pan for one egg.
Great concept but totally shite

mackthepony · 11/01/2023 02:09

But surely it's a wate of melon? Or you end up with uneven, half balls?

Oh the angst

Clevs · 11/01/2023 02:17

Mentalpiece · 08/01/2023 16:09

Silicone egg poachers.
The idea is that you crack the egg into it and then drop it into the boiling water.
Except when you ' turn it inside out ' to remove the egg, it either flips out and lands on the other side of the kitchen, or it breaks up and goes everywhere.
Egg poacher 0 - kitchen bin 1.

Get a spoon and run it round the edge of the cooked egg to loosen it away from the side, then use the spoon to slide it out onto your toast/plate etc.

Original poster
TheHauntedPencilCase · 18/01/2023 20:43

ThePug · 10/01/2023 23:53

Were you using the melon baller like an ice cream scoop, dragging it across the flesh? You're just meant to dig it in and rotate it to create a ball, so in the end you have the skin left with lots of craters in it. I think, I don't own one but remember doing it once, possibly with my grandmother.

Oh @ThePug I was! I didn't know this thank you.....Will buy another melon tomorrow

OP posts:
Original poster
TheHauntedPencilCase · 18/01/2023 20:48

@Misty666 does it waste a lot of cherry? I really want one but wasn't sure how practical they were

OP posts:
SlatternIsMyMiddleName · 18/01/2023 21:06

I love my melon baller. It came from my granny and must be well over 50 years old.

Scissors are much better at cutting pizza.

My contribution to the thread - a soup ladle. Who actually uses a soup ladle?

longwayoff · 18/01/2023 21:13

Just unplugged the charged Dyson and it worked for approximately 2 minutes. I really HATE the bloody useless expensive thing.

Crimsonripple · 18/01/2023 21:25

I have an olive spoon, I love it. Ours has drainage in it so it doesn't leave much residue juice.

Fluffyowl00 · 18/01/2023 21:30

Having also had lots of rubbish kitchen junk …I now recommend OXO Good Grips tin openers, potato peelers and pizza cutters. Amazing things and very reasonably priced.

…I do quite want a melon baller now though…

Maxifly · 18/01/2023 21:32

Cherry stoning gadget is brilliant. No waste and quick. Shame cherry season is a short one!

WaitingForSummertime · 18/01/2023 21:33

I'll contribute another Alessi product, the lemon squeezer. Beautiful to look at, but broke the second time we used it. As soon as we applied downward pressure to the lemon a leg broke.😡

However, we do use a soup ladle every time we make soup. Otherwise how do you get the soup out of a stock pot?! I guess some people scoop it out with a mug though.

BabyMoonPie · 18/01/2023 21:35

SlatternIsMyMiddleName · 18/01/2023 21:06

I love my melon baller. It came from my granny and must be well over 50 years old.

Scissors are much better at cutting pizza.

My contribution to the thread - a soup ladle. Who actually uses a soup ladle?

I use a soup ladle when I've made soup and need to portion it for the freezer! I also eat the soup with a soup spoon because my mother was aghast I didn't own any and was eating soup with a normal spoon so bought me a set

Giggorata · 18/01/2023 21:40

A complicated looking apple corer.
You're meant to impale the apple on the bit I can't help calling its bum, then place the blade on a spring on the outside.
You turn the handle and the apple rotates, with the peel coming off in nice spirals, and a perfect cylinder being cut out of the middle.

On the first two apples, it works perfectly but by the third, It goes disastrously off course, gouging great lumps out of the side, leaving areas of peel over the surface like scabs, also leaving nasty sharp core bits like nail clippings inside with the odd pip lurking as well.

I get given tons of apples, plus I am growing lots, and I thought this device was going to be a dream come true. 😢😡

SleepingisanArt · 18/01/2023 21:50

I love my VacuVin (wine saver) and have one for champagne too which pumps air in!
Often use a soup ladle and have had my trusty pizza cutter for at least 25 years.....
Hated the ice cream maker - took way too long and it's so much more fun to have different flavours ready to eat when I want them (thank you supermarket!)

Pocketfullofdogtreats · 18/01/2023 21:50

I agree about the apple peeler thing. DS bought one, heaven knows why. I think it's been used once, and it just takes up room in the cupboard. But I reserve my hatred for the salad spinner. I buy organic lettuce and don't wash it. The salad spinner is also a DS buy, and I hate its useless ugliness so much that I make him store it in his bedroom.

Tabitha1960 · 18/01/2023 21:50

I bought a pricey and fancy garlic press and it leaves literally half of every garlic clove uncrushed and sat in the slot as one big lump. One has to put a second garlic clove in to push through the first one, then is left with half of the second one uncrushed!

29052022J · 18/01/2023 21:51

I use a melon baller 2-3 times a week, I don’t find it creates much waste as I’m not bothered about perfectly round little melon balls. It’s also great for deseeding pumpkins and butternut squashes. I actually hate junky kitchen items that you don’t use and got the melon baller off my mum who didn’t use it. Only keep the utensils that you will you and never step foot in a Lakeland or that type of shop ever again 😂

Pocketfullofdogtreats · 18/01/2023 21:54

Yep, I agree about the ice cream maker. Huge waste of space.
Ditto the popcorn maker - we went back to just using a saucepan, so that got chucked out too.

29052022J · 18/01/2023 21:55

SleepingisanArt · 18/01/2023 21:50

I love my VacuVin (wine saver) and have one for champagne too which pumps air in!
Often use a soup ladle and have had my trusty pizza cutter for at least 25 years.....
Hated the ice cream maker - took way too long and it's so much more fun to have different flavours ready to eat when I want them (thank you supermarket!)

Yes love the wine saver, I got one for Christmas a couple of years ago and have since gifted them to other people who enjoy champs/prosecco. Also love a salad spinner, you would be amazed by what comes out and the colour of the water 🤢 Even the pre washed salad there’s always lots of manly bits flying out!

Eyesopenwideawake · 18/01/2023 21:57

Pineapple corer. Just no.