Why would a (non single) friend want their friend to stay single?

[ThePlotIsLostt]

What reason would you think that a friend who’s in a fairly toxic long term relationship would want their single friend to remain single?

Are you the single friend, hoping the non single friend leaves his/her partner for you?

Because if single friend becomes loved up with a nice person, they can no longer make the other person feel that they are the better off of the two. Which is fucked up, obviously, as it’s better to be single than in a toxic relationship. But that’ll be it.

Unfortunately some women still think any relationship is better than none, and being with someone, however unkind, controlling, abusive or nasty puts them in a superior position to their single friends.

Huh? I genuinely have no idea how you came to that conclusion.

Because the friend is then no longer at her beck and call - she'll have a partner to pay attention to instead.

That was what I was thinking. Sad really ..

Because they're in a toxic relationship and they want better for you!

Yep

Because they really Like their friend and are aware that for women being single is better than being in a relationship?

No it isn’t 🤦‍♀️ Not all of us end up in unhappy relationships. My relationship isn’t perfect but I’d be much less happy without my partner.

My friend who was in a long term relationship liked it when I was single because she liked the funny stories about one night stands and awkward dates, she had been in with her husband since they were 14 so was living vicariously thorough my free and single stories.

not true and what a sad life you must have if you believe this

Because if you get into a good relationship it will highlight quite how toxic their relationship is. Couple dating also.

And if you are single you couldn’t possibly understand …….

Lol 😂 what now? What kind of relationships have been in/witnessed? Emotionally healthy supportive relationships with clear boundaries whether romantic or not are life enhancing

Understand what?

That’s not the situation here.

I’ve also found that a bit patronising. I’m sure that’s just me.

I worked with a woman who had been with her husband since college and would always say things like “I’m so glad I never had to date” .. almost like a smugness.

But that would be on the presumption that all relationships are toxic? No matter who I dated/was in a relationship with it would be toxic?

I think that’s untrue. I’m very dependent, good job, own house, car etc so I’d only be in a relationship if it added to my life.

I’m under no illusion that any relationship I ended up in would be perfect. But I think to assume women should all be single is extreme.

Are you single?

Yup. And, I love it! Peace. Freedom. Hobbies. Friends. I accept it's not for everyone, but, crikey, I love it. ( have been in several relationships before, lovely ones, including a 20 year marriage, but it's a complete no brainer). For me. Everyone's different.

You don't necessarily see relationships as a positive if all you're ever known are toxic ones, though. Your head might know they can be great and life-enhancing, but your heart might panic for your friend.

Your non-single friend knows things that you have yet to learn.
She is trying to be kind.

Wish all the people who’ve been in unhappy relationships would stop projecting onto OP. If all your relationships are bad maybe YOU’RE the problem.

Do you think I’m a teenager about to start my first relationship?

Because otherwise please elaborate. Would you not want your adult single friend who’s already been in relationships to be in a new relationship because you don’t want her to learn lessons?

Because their relationship is toxic and they think people are better off alone than in the same situation as them?