Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Trapped toddler parents: Inspiration and support needed through the summer hols!!

990 replies

PinkDaydreams · 09/07/2021 12:59

Following on from the previous trapped toddler thread!
Sorry for rubbish title!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
61
Lostthetastefordahlias · 06/11/2021 07:40

Good luck @squishymamma! Hope DH not feeling too bad and is able to pull his weight Grin. We are going out for lunch (always less fun than you think it will be) and to a big park and playground today. Hope everyone has a lovely Saturday.

Motherofmonsters · 06/11/2021 07:51

My no shouting didn't last long. DS chucked his cereal on the floor as I put it in the green bowl and not the blue one... Then kept screaming when I said he couldn't have any more as it's a waste and to have toast/crumpet instead. He then screamed at his sister for daring to touch his drinks bottle. Going to be a looong day. DH is actually home today though so that's something.

Chocolatetrifle · 06/11/2021 12:03

My oldest is really giving me a hard time, since he turned 4 I have to say it's become really hard and I thought 3 was bad. He's been to a football class and been an angel there this morning but at home it's like a different story.

I'm wondering if he's just completely overtired. He's whinging about every little thing and full on scream crying if he doesn't get his own way. Have driven him around in the car to get him to nap to see if sleep will reset him somehow! Is this a new phase of the 4 year old?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
Motherofmonsters · 06/11/2021 18:31

I'm really struggling with DS as well @chocolatetrifle, they do have a hormone surge around 4 so that could be part of his meltdowns.

DS will not do a single thing you say, I've got to ask him ten times and then keep threatening to take things away before he will do it. I literally have got no idea what to do and it's really getting us down, I don't want to be falling out with him continuously. It's very very tiring.

BertieBotts · 06/11/2021 19:35

DS1 was so tough at 4, I really struggled that year. For me I think I was a bit crap at boundaries? I'm always a bit reluctant to go nuclear for anything but as a result I get quite stressed when they don't hang on your every word any more and you need cooperation with something and they just decide not to do it Hmm

Anyway I found Andrea Nair good but she hasn't really updated her page since then, which is a shame, she apparently brought out an app with useful phrases but it got removed from the play store and never came back :(

Janet Lansbury is great too, she has a free podcast. I also found the tips in How To Talk really get into their element at 4.

On the topic of cooperation though I've had a mini potty training success! I could tell it wasn't really helping DS2 (3y2m) when I brightly suggested using the toilet or even tried to persuade him, but someone on a parenting group reminded me of the slightly cheesy response "I know you'll use the toilet when you're ready." So every time I have the urge to plead or try and big it up in a fake way I just say that instead and this morning, with no prompting at all he decided to take his nappy off and wee in the toilet! Then he put shorts on instead of another nappy, and did a poo a bit later! Wooo! It all got waylaid again when we went out, but it's a start :)

squishymamma · 06/11/2021 19:55

Evening all!

Sounds like it's been a trying day for many of us. People never talk about the 4 year old stage - I naively thought the "terrible twos" would be the worst until I heard the word "threenager"...and now 4 year olds too. Sending you all support Flowers

We've had a very mixed day. DS is sick again with a fever and a bit of a cough, we haven't tested him but DH has something very similar and his test was negative. We'll see how he is tomorrow I guess and decide whether to test him then. RS virus is going around at the moment so fingers crossed it's not too bad. We had a lot of TV time, played with toys and took a little walk out, nothing too exciting.

I'm hoping for an early bedtime tonight because I've got that pre-illness feeling myself, but also haven't slept so well the past week, so maybe a good sleep will sort me out!

Hope everyone has a good evening.

squishymamma · 06/11/2021 19:57

Oh also meant to say great news @BertieBotts! I've heard that too, for lots of situations - so good to hear that it seems to actually work! Hope your progress continues Smile

Lostthetastefordahlias · 07/11/2021 06:46

Hope your little DS feels better soon squishymama. Its so exhausting when you and they are under the weather.
Congrats on the potty training progress BertieBotts and thanks for mentioning Andrea Nair - I have been reading her website while doing the early shift with my early waking 3 yr old and it is really interesting.
Hope you have an easier day Chocolatetrifle. Remember to look after yourself when things are challenging! Can you do something that DS loves today and make it an easier day for yourself maybe, and plan something nice for yourself this evening? I am already looking forward to a bath and a new Simple Things magazine Grin

Chocolatetrifle · 07/11/2021 07:59

Good morning everyone. Hope everyone had a good sleep?

We've been up since 5 .45 today. Gosh it's interesting isn't it, there must be something about turning 4? I keep hearing about a testosterone surge but I'm not sure if that has actually been proven. I've ordered a book called 'Calmer, easier, happier boys'.

@squishymamma how is everyone in your house this morning? Are you all feeling any better? Hope so.

@BertieBotts, fantastic on the potty training front!

@Motherofmonsters, we could be at similar stages with our boys then? Understand how you feel. I think we just have to give them space to express themselves however they feel in that moment. I'm really going to try to make sure I listen to him properly too. Going to try harder today.

@Lostthetastefordahlias, I'm with you on the self- care front. It's vital to not feel lost I think. I'm just colouring my hair now and hoping for a pamper tonight in the bathroom. I've decided to do something crafty for me too perhaps some sewing or something if I can.

What is everyone doing today? Hoping for a quiet day but I don't think they exist!

squishymamma · 07/11/2021 08:33

Morning!

Did you have a nice evening @Lostthetastefordahlias?

@Chocolatetrifle that's an early wakeup, hope you get chance to rest today. Let us know how the book is!

We had an interesting night, DS was up a little at the beginning but was knocked out by Calpol in the end and slept until 7.30am Grin DH was also up and down because he's not well, so he's still in bed now. I'm still in my pyjamas, but DS hasn't got a fever any more so I'll get dressed soon and hopefully take him out to play. It's raining though, and my raincoat doesn't fit over my bump any more...otherwise a quiet one for us, no plans!

Chocolatetrifle · 07/11/2021 17:18

Ho ho ho, have just had a mince pie. It's not too early really is it? How's everyone getting on today?

squishymamma · 07/11/2021 18:21

We had a very quiet day and DS had no fever all day...but then suddenly before bathtime it's 38.4?? How is this even possible? He seems perfectly fine in himself so I'm strongly considering just sending him to nursery tomorrow (if his fever is gone in the morning)...what would you lot do?

DH a bit better now. I've just hoovered and mopped all the floors as they were disgusting but did a half assed job because I'm so large now Grin planning to read a little of my book and have a nice long shower, and hope we manage to sleep well tonight...

Chocolatetrifle · 07/11/2021 20:13

@squishymamma. See how he is overnight and in the morning I'd just make a judgement call and send in if no fever. Hope your night goes ok and you all get some sleep. My boys are sniffing and snuffly so have got the vapour plug in and olbas out.

squishymamma · 08/11/2021 05:04

Well we are up and have been since 5.15am, DS is sick with a cold again and I'm not feeling great so I've resorted to TV (though he was happy to play a little too, so maybe isn't feeling absolutely terrible). Quiet day again for us i think!

Hope everyone else has a good day.

Chocolatetrifle · 08/11/2021 18:30

@squishymamma oh, that was an early start. How is DS now? Hope he is feeling better? How are you? Hope tonight is a better night.

We've had preschool this morning and then a playground visit this afternoon. Not much else to report from here at the moment. Looking forward to bedtime as per usual 🙂.

squishymamma · 08/11/2021 18:51

Glad to hear you had a relaxed day @Chocolatetrifle, sometimes it's nice when nothing major happens...

DS is worse tonight, just sat listening to him cry through the baby monitor whilst DH is in there trying to calm him down Sad the main issue is his nose, which is blocked and causing him to cough and wake up. Then he cries a lot which obviously creates snot and saliva, prolonging the problem...it's going to be a long night! I'm feeling the anxiety, which is always way worse when pregnant - I wasn't so anxious when DS was ill and I wasn't pregnant. Just trying to stay calm and take deep breaths!

Motherofmonsters · 08/11/2021 19:17

Oh @squishymama that sounds stressful, hope fully he'll settle down shortly and you can all get some sleep.

DS and DD have woken up with super snotty noses and DD has probably sneezed a hundred times. DDs nursery has shut as they've had two positive cases so she'll be home for the week and I'll be on edge at any coughs/throat clearings

Chocolatetrifle · 08/11/2021 19:53

@squishymamma do you have any saline nose spray for your ds? That can help sometimes if he will let you spray it. Hope you get through the night

@Motherofmonsters, oh no, sorry you've got snotty nose there too.

We've got the snotty noses too but fingers crossed nothing else materialises. Hope everyone gets some sleep.

Motherofmonsters · 08/11/2021 20:48

DD has woken up twice already so it's not looking great for tonight. I'm assuming it's the snot waking her up. Bad time to be out of plug in refills. I've covered in vapour rub so hopefully that'll help

squishymamma · 09/11/2021 02:33

Almost morning here...DH and I have done shifts tonight, so now I'm on mine. The worst thing is when they wake up crying inconsolably and you have to calm them down Sad DS has managed to sleep a little but it seems to be max an hour and a half before he's up again needing comfort. Often sooner...things nobody really tells you before having children eh?

squishymamma · 09/11/2021 02:33

Hope you're all managing to get some sleep @Motherofmonsters!

Original poster
PinkDaydreams · 09/11/2021 12:43

Oh gosh there's still so much sickness going round. DS had his flu vaccine yesterday which I was thinking he'd be a bit poorly today but thankfully fine. I had mine as well and have my covid booster tomorrow which I'm not looking forward to as I was terribly ill after the other two.

Has anyone started to think or book any Christmas activities? I don't think we will be doing much as (ASD) son doesn't properly understand yet and he's not good with queues/crowds. I've got some Christmas sticker books and some of that make your own snow in a test tube. Also make your own Christmas garlands.

OP posts:
Motherofmonsters · 09/11/2021 13:32

No sleep here, she just kept waking up. She's full of cold this morning, I've tried to clear her nose with saline spray but I can't get anywhere near her to it. There's no way I'll be able to test her so we will just stay away from people for 10 (long) days.

I haven't booked anything @pinkdaydreams, I feel like I should but I think it's just the pressure of 'making memories' all the big stuff is booked up so may try and find a garden centre Santa

Chocolatetrifle · 09/11/2021 14:40

How is everyone? How are the poorly little ones today?

I've just made the mistake of taking both DS to the car wash, thought they would like it but both ended up crying!

Original poster
PinkDaydreams · 09/11/2021 14:43

@Chocolatetrifle

How is everyone? How are the poorly little ones today?

I've just made the mistake of taking both DS to the car wash, thought they would like it but both ended up crying!

Funny you've said that as I was only thinking yesterday about taking Ds to the car wash as he loves his car wash toy and we set up a car wash in the garden in the summer which he liked........then I had flashbacks to the time we took him through the car wash last year and he was hysterical!!!!! I think it's because it's so loud, the brushes and the jets on the car.
OP posts: