baby at 38.....next baby when ? Age gaps

[banoffeejam]

What’s a sensible time to wait , given that had no issues conceiving (actually conceived just before turning 38)
Had a c section so would need to wait at least 12m (?) to fully heal but then should we crack on if want a sibling ?
What did other people do and what are your gaps as an older mum-dont want to leave it too late but aware that too close together may be tough on my body ?

Personally I wouldn’t wait long. I had 2 babies in my 20’s and last one at 38 and I feel exhausted most of the time. I definitely don’t have anywhere near as much energy.
I wouldn’t plan on having any in my 40’s but that’s only my view many women now do

First DS at 37, hoping to be pregnant next year when I'll be 38 going on 39. Had a c section also. Agreed with pp that I'm exhausted all the time but we're going to try all the same.

Were you told as well to wait at least 12 months for healing ?

My DH was 36 when we had twins and 40 with DC3. I don't know if it's because we already had 2 pre schoolers when DC3 came along or because he was a few years older but he really struggled with being exhausted with DC3.

I'd crack on ASAP!

I conceived easily at 37 and had a hell of a time conceiving again thereafter. So I wouldn’t be trying to plan an age gap.

I thought the advice was 12 months is preferable but a minimum of 6 months before getting pregnant after CSection.

Good luck to you!!!

It might not be advisable, but after I have DD1 within the next few weeks, we plan on TTC again in the New Year, all being well. I was 38 when I conceived (39 now) and it took us 7 cycles. We'd like at least one more.

@justanotherneighinparadise were you successful eventually

I had first at 36 and ttc within about 8 months, had a few miscarriages and eventually had second when I just turned 40 (heavily pregnant at 40) so took 2.5 years to conceive and over 3 til he arrived

Personally I wouldn't wait too long as it may be a bit of a journey as fertility is often reduced the older you get

Agree with ASAP. I had my third at 38 and it’s just so much more tiring than I expected.

Third at 38.
Christ. Shattered all the time. Then again, not sure how much that has to do with my age or with the fact that I have three little brutes, work full time and have no time for myself

ASAP. I didn't have a section but had mine 23 months apart at 37 and 39. Miscarriage in between. It was a tiring few years (I went back to work FT in between the two) but I wouldn't have said exhausting.

[quote banoffeejam]@justanotherneighinparadise were you successful eventually [/quote]
I had three miscarriages inbetween my children and a TFMR at 42. So I’ve gone through the wringer, but yes, eventually, I managed to have DC2.

ASAP!!!

There will be 19m between mine I was 37 when I gave birth to my son and 39 when my twins are due.

I want to enjoy my retirement .. plus the older u are the harder it is.

I wasn't told to wait 12m between sections.

I’m so glad you managed to and I’m sorry for everything you went through x

Same age and C section too here. I was too exhausted and sleep deprived to contemplate another pregnancy for a while but have the benefit of frozen embryos in storage. If they weren’t there, we would have started trying after 12-18 months but I was told 18m after C section minimum.

I had
Dd1 at 37
Dd2 at 38
Ds at 41

I had my second at 42...but we didn't intend that big a gap. Had a series of miscarriages in between and count myself very lucky that it all worked out in the end. By choice it would have been a two year gap.

18 months is the best time to leave after you had a baby before trying for another - it gives your body a chance to fully heal, no matter what your age is.

I had my first one at 37, waited until she was 18 months old and then tried for another (I'm now pregnant). I'll have it just over 40. It took me 3 cycles to get pregnant (2 the first time).

If you're knackered, I'd wait a bit. Another few months won't make any difference in terms of your ovaries, but it might in terms of the happiness of everyone involved.

We had our first when I was 36 and our second when I was 37. I was worried about going back on the pill after our first as I always wondered if I would regret it if we ended up having problems conceiving down the line. So we let fate take its course and ended up with a small age gap. It was hard at the start but definitely worth it now.

I was just wondering if I left a smaller gap yet something wasn’t fully healed and I got pregnant again quickly would I be at higher risk for mc than if I waited more than 12 m and healed fully basically is healing properly more vital than being a few months older or does each month that passes cut my chance significantly due to egg age

Worth thinking about other non-health things - will your career take a bigger hit if you go back to work for less time between pregnancies? Can you afford 2 in nursery FT before free hours kick in (unless you're staying home) etc.

Are you breastfeeding? I ask as around the clock feeds can act as a natural contraception (and the tiredness definitely is!).

Whilst I appreciate you are under a time limit, it's worth waiting 6months before trying as it's going to be tough managing the first trimester tiredness on top of a young baby's night feeds.

I fell pregnant 6 months after having a section. I wasn't advised otherwise, had another c section and it was fine. The surgeon was chatting while doing it and he did say if I had a 3rd it would be safest to go for a section.

I had my two at 38 and 41, two miscarriages in between and one before first. I think I started trying about 12 months.

Miscarriage at 40 was grim. First two I shrugged off as not meant to be but that one was much more 'I am too old, I cannot put myself through hope/disappointment again..' whilst really really wanting a sibling for DD. And then hooray third one stuck and DS is nearly 3 years younger than DD but only 2 school years apart which I always think was very clever of me! Lucky, lucky, lucky.