Im a retired shoplifter AMA

[WorkingGirlJem]

That's it really. Have been a shoplifter for approx 10 years, and have recently decided to stop.
I'm not proud of myself, am fully expecting to get flamed, but and am hoping getting this out there will help with my resolve to stop permanently.
AMA

Do you get a pension?

Retired? You mean you are not currently committing repeated criminal offences? I'm glad you have stopped but you need some serious help for your kleptomania rather than being on AMA.

What other criminal activity were you involved with in the past? You weren't just a shoplifter.

Walnut??

Did you enjoy the stuff you stole? I ask because I stole some stickers as a child, about 45 years ago, didn't enjoy them at the time as I felt guilty and still do.

I apologise if I have upset or offended anyone by using the word Retired. I see know that it was badly phrased. Ex would have been a better word.

sallygoroundthemoon
I am not a kleptomaniac, as sufferers of that are unable to help themselves. I made a conscious decision to do it.

@kirsty's quote from OP,
'am not involved in any other criminal activity, but I have been in the past.'

Wow. Then you really do need help. So I have a question then - do you consider yourself a bad person?

My expensive and extravagant steal?

Any times you almost got caught?

How did you keep under the radar/get away with it? Any tips

What was the most expensive item you ever stole?

RainintheSummer
This is the odd thing (although I'm sure in the know would be able to explain it easily) I stole stuff that I liked and wanted, however once I had them they brought me no pleasure at all, only guilt.

For the past month I have taken so much pleasure in buying things.
Today I went to the shops and saw a very expensive pillow I would really love and enjoy. It would have been so easy to just steal it, however I got a lovely feeling from deciding to go home, look at my bank statement online and decide if I could afford it this week, or later in the month.

You're lucky that you were never caught.

Largeish Electrical items? How?

When you gave stolen items as gifts, did you ever get asked for a receipt to change/return them? If so, how did you handle this?

Wow! Stop flaming the woman, im guessing all you negative posters are 100% perfect

Not perfect but not a thief.

sally yes I do. But only because of the shoplifting. In the rest of my life I am a kind, generous, patient, loving and moral person.

I cannot exactly remember my most extravagant stolen item, however on one occasion it was 2 Fitbits, another time it was a microwave.
I regularly stole £200-£300 of items in one day.

Pilingonthepounds
no, as far as I am aware I never almost got caught.
I would never post tips on how I stayed under the radar, however I will say that different shops require different techniques, and it became increasingly difficult over the years.

@cherry, she's a thief. We pick up the tab as consumers whilst she's swanning around with her "freebies."

“....im guessing all you negative posters are 100% perfect”

If you define “100% perfect” as never committing a crime or worse, a decade of criminal activity... yup, you’ve guessed right.

How the fuck do you steal a microwave?

Hardly by tucking it in your coat.

Pram involved OP?

How the fuck do you steal a microwave?
(Not aggression, my mind is actually boggling!)

I am a moral person. It's incredible how people can brainwash themselves to avoid admitting to themselves that they are a POS.

For some people its an addiction.

She doesn't shoplift anymore so maybe a bit of praise would be better than nasty comments!

But hey ho, this is Mumsnet, where people love to put each other down!

And im not a shoplifter btw

Oh get over yourself @cherry, a thief comes on to MN and does an AMA - of course people will be judgemental!