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Original poster

Where did I go wrong financially?

331 replies

ogfs · 10/10/2023 16:45

I know this will sound bitter and I definitely do appreciate all I have in life. But here goes… I feel like I have messed you massively financially. I’m in my late thirties and despite thinking I had been very savvy with money, it turns out I am way behind the curve compared with most people. I have been an accountant since I was 25, I started on 30k and now earn 68k, I’m 38. In that time I have only managed to acquire 180k equity in my home and I have debt that is currently interest free. My car is on finance as I have never had enough to buy outright. I thought I was doing ok, that I had been sensible with money (credit card debt was to pay legal fees for house move and a down payment on a car). I have 4K savings, not used for debt as debt is serviced interest free.

It turns out that literally everyone I know is in a better financial situation. Nobody I know is in debt at all, people on much lowers salaries. Nearly everyone had paid off their mortgage. Everyone seems to buy nice cars, much pricier than mine! I don’t know if I missed the boat on investments or something? Or perhaps they didn’t have student loans that I had been paying off until last year? I can’t understand why I feel so financially precarious when other people in much less well paid jobs seem to have been much for astute about money. Obviously I feel even more stupid given I’m an accountant… I really thought I had been quite savvy with money. I can’t really change it now can I? It’s too late. I’m way behind the curve and have 60% loan to value on my home so never going to pay it off anytime soon. Where have I gone wrong?!

OP posts:
Original poster
ogfs · 10/10/2023 16:45

*messed up massively

OP posts:
Littlegreene82 · 10/10/2023 16:46

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pinkfondu · 10/10/2023 16:46

Are you dingle and they are couples?

Original poster
ogfs · 10/10/2023 16:47

I am single now but haven’t always been single, only the last 3 years

OP posts:
Littlegreene82 · 10/10/2023 16:48

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YaWeeFurryBastard · 10/10/2023 16:48

Nearly everyone you know has paid off their mortgage at 38? Seems hugely unlikely tbh it’s perfectly normal, I’d even say slightly better than average to have 60% LTV at 38.

RedHelenB · 10/10/2023 16:48

Sounds like you're very well off to me, with plenty of time to get richer. Enjoy what you have.

UsernamenotavailableBob · 10/10/2023 16:48

Being single is expensive. That said you've got significant equity in your property where others have perhaps channelled the money into a savings pot. How long until you're mortgage free?

Littlegreene82 · 10/10/2023 16:48

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Original poster
ogfs · 10/10/2023 16:48

midlands! Nowhere expensive

OP posts:
BarnacleBeasley · 10/10/2023 16:49

Have you got a decent amount of pension savings? If so you're probably ahead of a lot of people in that respect, especially if you've been working full-time since 25.

Littlegreene82 · 10/10/2023 16:49

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FrenchandSaunders · 10/10/2023 16:49

I think people you know are bending the truth. It sounds to me like you're in a great position for your age. I didn’t have a pot to piss in at 38.

Original poster
ogfs · 10/10/2023 16:49

UsernamenotavailableBob · 10/10/2023 16:48

Being single is expensive. That said you've got significant equity in your property where others have perhaps channelled the money into a savings pot. How long until you're mortgage free?

@UsernamenotavailableBob everyone I know has tiny amounts left on their mortgage, last week I learnt that my closest friends will be mortgage free next year! I just don’t get how. And I have overpaid my mortgage too but still got loads to go.

OP posts:
cryinglaughing · 10/10/2023 16:50

I wouldn't be all woe is me if I was in your position.
Have you considered that maybe all these debt free, mortgage free friends may be stretching the truth?

Original poster
ogfs · 10/10/2023 16:50

BarnacleBeasley · 10/10/2023 16:49

Have you got a decent amount of pension savings? If so you're probably ahead of a lot of people in that respect, especially if you've been working full-time since 25.

@BarnacleBeasley 8% of my salary goes to pension, I don’t know if that’s a lot or not compared with most

OP posts:
jesmonabullets · 10/10/2023 16:50

Have your friends had help from the Bank of Mum & Dad?

Original poster
ogfs · 10/10/2023 16:51

cryinglaughing · 10/10/2023 16:50

I wouldn't be all woe is me if I was in your position.
Have you considered that maybe all these debt free, mortgage free friends may be stretching the truth?

@cryinglaughing maybe but I don’t know why they would?

OP posts:
Temporaryname158 · 10/10/2023 16:51

If you only have £4k in savings to at
s a small cushion compared to what
you earn. I would review your finances and cut them down to only essentials.

what does that leave you with a month? Use that to boost savings and overpay the mortgage.

im saying this gently but not everyone has a car on finance. You made this financial choice. Lots of people buy out right. Saving up until they can afford a small/cheap car. Wha
t car are you driving and how much do you pay a month?

£68k is a lot of money. You need to work out where yours is going and make adjust
ments as you see fit, to mat
ch the priorities in your life.

UsernamenotavailableBob · 10/10/2023 16:51

ogfs · 10/10/2023 16:49

@UsernamenotavailableBob everyone I know has tiny amounts left on their mortgage, last week I learnt that my closest friends will be mortgage free next year! I just don’t get how. And I have overpaid my mortgage too but still got loads to go.

Show quote history

It's a position of extreme privilege to have cleared the mortgage before 40 and sounds like they've all done it in a partnership. You're either over thinking it or you know you're in a good position compared to others.

towriteyoumustlive · 10/10/2023 16:51

At £68k you take home £4000 a month ish.

You can do one of those "SOA" (statement of affairs) things to see where it is all going.

£180k equity is great if you bought in the last couple of years, but not so great if you bought aged 25, as most of that would have then come from the price increase rather than you repaying the mortgage.

I don't have a car on finance but I'm going to guess my 9 year old car (that was 6 years when I bought it) is much older than yours...?

Lots of people spend far more than they realise.

Beezknees · 10/10/2023 16:52

Jesus. I'm 33, earn £22k and have zero assets and only a couple of grand in my pension. What exactly are you worried about?

Original poster
ogfs · 10/10/2023 16:52

Temporaryname158 · 10/10/2023 16:51

If you only have £4k in savings to at
s a small cushion compared to what
you earn. I would review your finances and cut them down to only essentials.

what does that leave you with a month? Use that to boost savings and overpay the mortgage.

im saying this gently but not everyone has a car on finance. You made this financial choice. Lots of people buy out right. Saving up until they can afford a small/cheap car. Wha
t car are you driving and how much do you pay a month?

£68k is a lot of money. You need to work out where yours is going and make adjust
ments as you see fit, to mat
ch the priorities in your life.

@Temporaryname158 i literally could not work without a car. I don’t know how I would have been expected to save to buy a car outright.

OP posts:
Littlegreene82 · 10/10/2023 16:52

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Hygeelady · 10/10/2023 16:53

I wouldn't believe them! Most people are paying their mortgage til they are 60 odd and that's normal. Lots of people get cars on finance and pay monthly. I think its normal to have some debt given the cost of living!