Old fashioned way FTmum

So few mums fit a stereotype. None of us are fully old fashioned or fully organic or fully attachment or fully disciplinarian or whatever.

Don't label your friend. It makes you sound very judgy

Don’t want to pile on but I’ve spotted it in other threads. You’ve had one? Two? Babies you’re not the font of all knowledge. I was baffled when my sister asked the best way to burp her newborn. I dunno, but here’s the 50 things I tried let’s see what works.

I have friend in European countries who act like we (in Britain) are Victorian in our attitude to child rearing so it varies massively but by and large everyone is getting their babies to adulthood.

OK, this wasn't clear from your op at all, but I see now without the need for block caps.

My point stands though- there's just no need to double down on your advice if she disagrees with it. Her plans aren't unsafe, just different

My only input is that we all have completely different ideas about how we will raise our children until the reality. When she meets the baby and realises what it’s like she may well change her mind about a few of the things you mentioned.

This. She'll have her ideas and then the baby will have their own ideas when they arrive, and they'll work out a routine which works for both of them. There's no point taking issue with anything she says at the moment because (i) it's not your place, but (ii) she may well choose to do things differently from how she planned when the baby arrives.

I am sure she is now coming up with other labels, maybe ones she is not telling you about

Honestly when I look at some of the hand wringing that goes on about the simplest thing these days I think the old fashioned ways are quite possibly the best. Common sense seems to be something that's scolded out of us when we have babies now.

The point doesn’t stand, a “typo” isn’t an excuse for a pile of garbage.

Oh so people don't lose babies or pregnancies. What an unpleasant sanctimonious viewpoint.
But well done on being perfect.

Why is any of this your business?

FWIW I don't think this is cultural. It's just someone disagreeing with you.

Back of and stop judging.
Many people don't bring stuff in before the baby. In my country pram is kept with family or neigbours for example and comes into the house after the baby to not jinx anything.

People do things differently in different places and different healthcare systems have different advice.

I don't see tjat friendship going on much longer and pretty sure she is rethinking taking the old stuff from you.

I'm British and had a friend who took it upon herself to "pass on information" and stuff. I found it incredibly overwhelming, irritating and upsetting. She was also far more excited about my baby than I was.

My husband and I have taken to calling one of our oldest friends "You should" in private.

Because of everyone we know, she's the one who can't pass up a chat without saying that "you should do this/that/the other" - including statements about how we should feel, and how she doesn't think we're acting excited enough.

Whereas my oldest friend casually asked how we were feeling, and laughed when I said "Yeah, we're excited, but we're us-excited. It's never all singing all dancing, is it?"

Because that's the sort of people we are, and reasonable people don't expect you to completely change personality because a baby is on the way.

You know, not everybody is bubbling over with excitement at being pregnant, right? That's not abnormal. Plenty of my friends absolutely hated being pregnant, showed zero enthusiasm or excitement. But that changed once the baby was actually here.

I have a friend who was much like this when pregnant - referred to it as "it", spent a lot of time wondering how to arrange childcare/ put it in its own room asap, didnt' seem excited at all. She was fine once the baby arrived. Anxiety mainly I think.

She was British btw. Not sure what you make of that given your seemingly very strong need to pin this on your "friend" being foreign.

We put ds2 in his own room at 8 weeks. Discussed it with the health visitor who told me that just because the nhs guidelines recommended something, didn't mean we had to go along with it.