I’ve lost my mojo

[WasntSupposedToBeLikeThis]

I know money is not the be all but we are in a situation where we were comfortable. Not rich but we could go for a coffee if we wanted.
DH has his own business and he lost a big client last year and so far hasn’t been able to replace him as yet.
There are so many things in the house that need doing. It’s getting me down because we can’t afford to do anything. We need new carpets because they are really grubby but we can’t even afford to get someone in to give them a deep clean.
we can’t afford to do anything nice anymore. Not even go for a coffee.

We have had to have a mortgage break which is coming to an end.

I work but don’t earn anywhere near enough.

DH can’t claim benefits as he has his own business and still has a couple of clients but they don’t bring in anywhere near enough business.

We do go out for walks etc but sometimes I just want to stop at a cafe like we used to.

DH has tried to get PAYE employment but he’s 63 and finding that nobody will employ him.

Both of us have worked since we were 16 so have paid our fair share into society. It just feels sad that it has come to this at this stage of our lives. We have depleted our savings and even dipped into our pensions.

Its making me miserable.

I get it isn't easy but he should keep going with looking for work. My husband was made redundant twice in his sixties. He wouldn't get paid as much but we survived. Can either or both of you pick up extra part time work? I appreciate you may have health issues that make that impossible. My husband only just got through as his health made it more and more difficult to continue in his manual job.

Otherwise can you downsize at all? I would then just clean the carpets.

I know that walking is more fun if you can stop for a coffee, but can you take your own and both agree to make it enjoyable?

Good luck to you

We've had a bad run of it the last couple of years
I took had a mortgage break and it impacted my credit file. Please check that as they are able to mark it A ( arrangement), mine wouldn't! Mine is trashed. No credit again in the foreseeable future.
We are similar ages to you and you can't turn the clock back. We had our DC late and are still paying for one.
I've never experienced ageism in the workplace but plenty of sexism! Would your husband be able to work in the civil service or civy side of the forces/ police?

Rug doctor is £20 or so and they're brilliant. Otherwise I've seen Vax on marketplace.

This sounds tough op. What do you do for a living and are you full time? Just wondering if we can help make suggestions for improving your income, even just a little bit so you can afford to go for the odd coffee and rent a rug dr.

We were financially screwed over by the GFC in the late 2000s when we were in our 40s with a primary aged child. Prior to the GFC we had luxuries, not rich but we could afford the odd dinner out, hobbies and a holiday abroad. I was made redundant as I worked for a construction firm and had to take a job with a lower salary, my dh was also self employed in the tourism industry and had a huge drop in profits. Arguably two of the most affected industries. Dh died soon after, so I was a single income after that (although I can't blame market forces for that).

It's hard to see that standard of living wash away, but there are lots of joys in life. My dd never talks about her holidays abroad, but the seaside holidays she had with her grandparents and cousins. And you do come to appreciate things more, I remember finally renovating my spare room after I received some inheritance and it was like magic. We renovated most the house yet I never experienced that feeling when I saw my fancy sash windows.

To be blunt, nearly 20 years later and as I approach my retirement age I have never financially recovered, but I have made my peace. I have a home, which could although be in better condition it's still a roof over my head, I have a wonderful child, and great family/friends.

I work full time already so no potential to up my hours. I work in an admin related role.
DH’s business is finance related.