How to ask for sick leave for mental health at work

[Hotmess17]

Hi all

I am new here and this is my first post. I am Looking for some advice on taking sick leave from work for my mental health.

I am not someone who really takes time off work sick at all, it was always just drummed into me from when I started working when I was younger that you go to work unless you have a leg hanging off and just work through it when you’re feeling unwell, this is what I seen my parents do and just something I’ve always done too, so I find the thought of approaching my manager about it really daunting.

This is a bit different as due to some things that have happened in my personal life this year I have found myself to be constantly frazzled, mentally overwhelmed and panicky a lot of the time, getting upset and becoming snappy at my husband very easily, and it hasnt seemed to get any better.

i would like to take this week off work which would be Monday to Thursday for me. I have a week of annual leave booked for the following week, but no more annual leave available. I believe doing this would really help me to reset and rest mentally. However both my parents and husband aren’t very supportive of this and don’t understand how I’m feeling, so I’m starting to wonder if I’m wrong or weak to be taking time off. It seems quite a big deal to me as it’s not something ive ever done really.

I am also not sure how to approach my manager about it, I thought i could maybe send an email today detailing that I need this time off, but I’m worried they will want me to check in each morning to let them know if I still need to be off. Im also not sure what to say. Is requesting sick leave in this way acceptable?

any help would be appreciated! Thank you x

You don't ask. You wouldn't ask if you broke a leg or contracted norovirus or meningitis. You don't need permission to be too unwell to work and that applies just as much to mental illness as physical.

Are you too ill (mentally) to work? If so you can report in sick but you need to be mentally unwell not just tired, fed up, too much going on at home, none of that is mentally unwell, if actually mentally unwell you are entitled to time off as having a broken leg

Sorry you’re feeling so low at the moment.

Never “ask” for sick leave. You are an adult and you know how bad you feel, you don’t need anyone’s permission to be ill. I suspect you’ve not been truly honest with your family about how bad you feel which is why they don’t seem supportive.
Dont contact work today as that looks planned. Tomorrow contact your manager by whatever means your organisation’s policy is for reporting sickness (I have to ring my line manager before 9am) and tell them you are very unwell and won’t be in this week. You self certify for 7 days and then you would need a Drs Fit note if you’re still unwell.

But make sure while you’re off you take steps to address whatever is causing the issues and put things in place otherwise you run risk of just relapsing again.

I hope you feel better soon

Yes I believe at this time my mental health is stopping me from doing my job properly as I can’t concentrate on my work, and I am starting to feel physically unwell because of it too. It is more than just tired and fed up. I enjoy my job but I am struggling to do it just now because of the way I feel . I also have a very ill family member too which is causing me a lot of stress.

Most places require you to ring in every day when you’re self certified.
I would go and see your doctor, if you feel unwell enough to not be working then perhaps you need some counselling or meds.

Just ring in (or whatever you policy is) and say you’re unwell and won’t be in. You might need to phone in daily.

4 days off would be self certified rather than needing a doctors note. Maybe use that time to seek support.

I'd just go to the GP and get a note saying I can't work for a few weeks due to MH. They should give you that? Then tell work about it?

You need to report per your policy - which may be to ring each day for the self certify. You may need to say what the issue is or may be able to say simply you’re unable to attend work as unwell. Depends on your employer and your manager.

GPs won’t usually give you a sick note until you have self certified for a week so it can be a bit of a catch-22 and a factor in causing a lot of stress at an already stressful time!

I’ve been in this situation so really empathise with you - I felt really guilty and didn’t feel I should take the time off and by the time I did I was literally at breaking point and justified it ro myself because I felt I was highly likely to do something catastrophic at work.

What I will say having come through the other end…it was not a big deal, I am really glad I took the time for myself, it was absolutely the right thing to do and I wish I’d done it sooner and with less worry.

(This might be not the case for you but also something to think about just in case - I realise with hindsight perimenopause was a big part of it. There was a load of situational stress and life shit happening too - but peri was definitely impacting my ability to cope with that and I definitely felt a lot better a few months later when HRT had kicked in. So maybe consider if that’s a possibility for you, I was younger than “typical” so this had been dismissed and GPs can sometimes be unhelpful in this area and a bit trigger happy with prescribing anti depressants or anti anxiety meds).

I’m sorry that your family aren’t being supportive about this. But you look after yourself.

Hope you’re feeling more yourself soon x

You mention you have annual leave booked. Probably worth checking you are allowed to proceed to A/L, with some employers it is at the manager’s discretion. Also, if you are going on holiday, you may need to tell your travel insurance that you are mentally unwell (if anything happened they may use your illness to wiggle out of covering you).

Get a GP note saying you will not be fit to work for a week. Mental health leave is like anything else — you need to take it when you first start feeling unwell, not wait until you’re in crisis. The latter will end up requiring a much longer stretch of leave.

Also, pay no attention to what your parents or DH say. Trust your own sense of how you’re feeling and what you need. I ignored this in the past and my mental health deteriorated rapidly and had an enormously negative impact on my career. If I could go back and tell myself one thing it would have been to take time off early.

Who are you to say none of that is mentally unwell because all of those can certainly make you mentally unwell