Going on mat leave

[Habesha91]

I will be going on mat leave next week and will be sending a goodbye message to the work group chat. Of course I will be telling the manager when baby arrives too and for the news to be shared. However, will I need to tell colleagues that I'm close to when baby arrives or are they supposed to reach out once they hear the announcement from manager?

The two people im close to have group chat between us too but one of them is on bereavement for the last three months so it has been quiet for a while. For reference, I've been initiating contact with the one on bereavement for the last few months as I would like to check on her but she never reached out to ask about my pregnancy or me since she lost her parent.

Do I need to let the two people know when the baby arrives, send pics on the group chat etc or shall I leave for them to contact me? Also the group chat has been quiet since the other is still on leave. I'm just unsure what the best way to approach this.

there isn’t even an emoji to show the expression reading this has just made my face contort into😂

You don’t need to tell anyone anything
but if you’re close you can.

I messaged my manager when baby had arrived as she wanted to see photos.

I would leave whatsapp etc out of anything with colleagues.

I emailed (on her work email address) the colleague I was closest to, several days after the baby had arrived. Then they forwarded it to relevant team members/ manager.

Then I didnt think about them or work for several months.

Oh dear. If this is preoccupying you, I imagine we’ll be seeing a LOT of threads from you once the baby arrives, and then nursery issues, then school issues….

We put a note in our weekly newsletter If the person wants us to say they will be on mat/pat leave. If they send us a photo & baby details we will ask if they would like us to share in the weekly news. If they want to share the news with work friends, that's up to them. We send cake but don't expect updates or visits.

Do whatever you want. There are no rules.

The only person you usually tell is your manager and of course any friends you want to. Your manager needs to know what date your mat leave starts and when your baby is born usually. In our place it’s customary to send a picture of the baby and you if you want to; and then that’s shared around

Oh, I find this such a sad post. What's happened that people no longer chat and support their colleagues? I can't comprehend working in an environment like this.

OP, tell who you want. I'd personally expect you to share with everyone but that's obviously considered unacceptable on here.

OK, so my youngest is nearly 15, and pre WasApp. DS was born on the Sunday after finishing work on the Friday! I messaged my manager. He let HR and the team know. Area manager sent flowers. All fairly standard stuff then. I hadn’t shared my personal email address with anyone, but emailed a couple of close colleagues a few weeks later.

3 years later with DD, pretty much the same. Different manager at that point, who loved babies and lived nearish by, so she delivered flowers on her way home and came for a cuddle.

I’d tell my manager as a courtesy, and because I know she’d be delighted for me and would want a squishy baby photo. I’d also message colleagues who are also friends in whatever way is usual for us, which would be via WhatsApp. Don’t overthink it, people are generally happy to receive good news.

I wouldn’t read anything into your bereaved colleague not asking about you or your pregnancy, loosing a parent is very tough and she may just not be able to lift her head at the moment.

Honestly OP, you are over thinking this. Tell your manager, send a photo if you’re inclined, confirm if you are happy for news to be shared. Beyond that, tell whoever you want to. There’s no right or wrong in this.

What bit is sad? That one bereaved colleague is being quiet?
Genuinely don't understand what you think is happening here.

Remote working!

As for sharing photos, names, weights and DoB, so many parents have their own rules for what can & can't be shared. If they want to give details it's their shout.

Mat leave must start by the time the baby is born. So if you’ve taken annual leave ahead of Mat leave, and the baby is born before you get to the period of mat leave,
at the very least you need to let your manager or HR know once the baby is born, so they can trigger mat leave.