How to address a possible bad reference when job seeking?

[BedSlug]

I haven't worked for 20 years due to being trapped in an abusive relationship, but now we are getting divorced I need to get back to work. When I left my last role, my OH managed to persuade me that I shouldn't work my notice of a month and so I left and only gave a week's notice. Doh.

How should I address this?

It doesn't help that the employer before that doesn't exist any more, but the one before that does, and should give a good reference.

It was 20 years ago.

No one at that company will give the slightest shit about it, even if its on record. You'll be lucky if they even manage to confirm your dates of employment.

Really? That would be great!

No one will keep records that long. It's many times more than how long these should be kept. As pp said, they will probably not even be able to confirm your dates from that long ago

I wouldn’t worry, as others have said they probably don’t have the records anymore and you can’t give a bad reference anyway x

OK thanks very much, I've been so worried!

Nonsense. You absolutely can give a ‘bad’ reference if it’s factually correct.

E.g. “while at Bloggs Inc, Fenella Footman embezzled £70k and was convicted of fraud. We would not re-employ her.”

The 20 years out of work is going to be your biggest hurdle. Sorry.

I was 8 years out of work in a private occupation and was unable to get references as people had lost contact/moved. They took character references in placement.

Just not true. Of course you can give/ get a bad reference, otherwise what is a reference for? What you can't (or shouldn't ) do is give a dishonest reference. So if by some miracle the employer still has records saying the OP left the job without notice they could choose to include that info if asked for a reference about OP.

The problem here is that nobody gives a reference after 20 years (or at least highly unlikely). @BedSlug you won't be able to get a reference from that employer at all good or bad, so you will need a reference from an alternative source. Have you ever done any voluntary work? Or unpaid helping out e.g. babysitting or gardening for a friend? They could give you a personal or character reference instead of an employer reference.

I had a Christmas job in 2023 I could possibly get a reference from. How about if I do temping work or agency work? Could I do that without references and use that to build a reference history?

Well usually agencies want references too. My best advice is apply for what you want to do and think you would be good at, write a really strong covering letter/statement if this is accepted with the application, use the 2023 reference, anything really old won’t be much good. If they need a second reference ask if you can use a character reference instead. Some industries are stricter than others on references. If you’re really not getting anywhere, do any in-person part time college course to upskill and ask the tutor if they would mind giving a reference.