How do i ask for a reference?

[PithyMauveZebra]

Im a teacher. We have to ask in advance. Dont ask whg its this way. It just is. I dont want to have this conversation in person. The head is rather intimidating. Can anyone help me draft an email. Words are failing me rn

"Hey babe, I want out of this dump. I need a good reference from you or I'll tell everyone what happened at the Christmas party. Laters potatoes"

all references should be asked in advance so thats not unusual.

I wouldnt email either,especially if she's intimidating - it looks as though you're afraid to ask her face to face.

Just say "would you mind giving me a reference for ................. because ................

and thats really all you have to say.

I’m a HT and I get reference requests all the time. Just send them an email if you don’t want to see them in person.

Dear Headteacher,

I hope this email finds you well.

I have recently reflected on my career development and future aspirations, and an opportunity has arisen at Mumsnet School for a Head of Department position. I believe this role would allow me to utilise my skills and experience effectively while continuing to add value within a leadership capacity.

I would be very grateful if you would be willing to support my application and provide a reference should one be requested.

Thank you for your continued support.

Kind regards,
pithy

Have you spoken to your line manager before approaching the head? Might be worth giving them the heads up too!!

I like something friendly and personal.

Hi Jetlag, I've really enjoyed working with you all - I love the Christmas party and us making best target in xxx (always mention a positive you've been part of). I also really appreciate all the training you've give me on xxx

I've seen a great new role and they're going to ask you for a reference - hope that's okay?

I absolutely love my team to progress and want them to get great jobs

Dear HT,
Hope you are well. I'm writing to ask if you would mind being added as a reference for .....

I do think teaching is bizarre in its recruitment methods. Most jobs don't require upfront notification that you are looking to move elsewhere. I was told that if you turn down a teaching job offer then the HT would be very likely to phone around all the local schools to tell them you're not to be trusted.

This was some years ago, during a brief teaching career, but I don't get why teaching thinks it's a special case.