I have been in the same profession for 20 years, not a high flyer or a specialist but a steady pair of hands, a team player, reliable and supportive etc. I have had ups and downs over the years, bad management, poor resources etc at times but essentially the job itself has never really been the issue, it felt like my calling and on the whole I was good at it.
In recent years i have felt boxed in by stress, expectations from clients, targets from corporate owners, financial constraints to treatment. I have turned this in on myself, blamed burn out, compassion fatigue, perimenopause, a lack of resilience, mental health, making it a me problem. But I have had a realisation that the job is so different now, that so many layers of stress and complexity have been added and pretty much everyone else in my position is unhappy/thinking about leaving too. Do we gas light ourselves when we keep saying it’s not the job it’s xyz that’s the problem. Maybe it actually is the job?
But I feel guilty to waste all the training and experience, I do a job others think they’d dream of doing. I have no clue what else I could do and no other particular passions. My work gives me exactly the hours I want, is local and my team are great.
Anyone else been here? What did you do?