Work dilemma

[Itsenoughnow]

Okay so I will try and keep this brief i am in a new role and my manager is like no one else I have ever worked for I think he’s a bit of a bully in one meeting he banged his fists down on the table in another meeting he said I had quote ‘ made him look like a dick ‘ because he was unhappy with my performance I left both meetings in tears I did ask for a meeting with him and I did say I was unhappy with the way he had spoken to me but he was careful not to apologise but said sometimes he could be blunt. I thought about reporting him and e mailed by old manager but then decided against it as didn’t want to rock the boat, now she has asked to see me what should I do ? I’m worried about saying anything now as he has been a bit better lately but I don’t want to say everything has been great as it hasn’t been.

Why has she asked to see you?

Do you and your old manager work for the same employer? Have you moved department? I don't see how she's involved otherwise.

If you're all at the same company, I presume its quite large and will have an HR team. I'd be talking with HR if I were you.

I don’t think it was at all appropriate to drag in your old manager

nip it in the bud! Have a discussion with HR.

Tell the truth in detail then write down what you said who too etc . I had to complain about a manager once and it so was hard as they picked apart what happened , what was said etc , so record everything .
im so glad I made the complaint as I was believed , I did it to stand up for myself and others who were not brave enough

Just to add she is my current manager he is a team leader

So why call him your “manager”
and her your “old manager”

odd

I am guessing old manager has been promoted higher but was perhaps previously her team leader.

Is there any issue with your performance? Have you made mistakes? More mistakes than before he started? I think I would still go to the meeting with old boss/ manager and ask the procedure for moving teams. You don't need to go into details and put in a bullying complaint unless you want to but he isn't going to change overnight into a nice person and your performance is likely to decline further if you are stressed.

I’m stressed out about it that’s all she is still technically my manager but he has more to do with me than she does now as I’m now in his team

Thanks mexctitedfam and everyone for the advice and support part of me can’t really believe it’s happening as I have been in my profession for such a long time and have never encountered anything remotely like this guy I think I just need to take a deep breath and talk to her, thanks for helping me with this

You were right to go to your manager, his behaviour sounds so inappropriate!

You just need to tell her what you’ve said here, give her as many actual facts as possible. She likely already knows about his behaviour but it takes someone complaining for anything to be done about it. She might ask what you want to happen - do you have any thoughts?

Hope it goes well 🤞🏼