My take on the narcissism element.
The narcissism is a deep part of the personality structure and beneath the trans stuff he’s currently channelling it through. It was always there.
I agree that the moment he feared that SP would rally others round to her view is key. His narcissism would prevent him from feeling able to SURVIVE being denied access to the CR. A feeling of overwhelm and powerlessness so all-consuming that he actually cannot imagine living through it.
It was life or death, to him. If he was denied access, he couldn’t come to work and face (and walk through) the humiliation of having lost. (He is not capable of imagining how having done the same to SP might feel.)
In the same way, he is demanding an apology from SP. If he is asked to apologise to HER, he feels he will not be able to survive that. He will not be able to do it, due to not being able to tolerate the overwhelming feeling of perceived shame. He will feel unimaginable terror at the idea of it. Life or death, to him.