Puberty/sex education books for 9 year old boy

[BakedBeansBang]

My 9 year old son turns 10 in June, and I'm planning to have a talk with him about what will happen to his body and girls' bodies, about healthy sexual relationships (age-appropriate of course) and consent, about the fact he may see porn and why it isn't (generally) a true representation of consensual sex, etc.

I have always been open with him about where babies come from, why I bleed and have to wear pads, etc, and we have The Body Book by Claire Rayner, but I'd like to find a book to give him that is a bit more grown-up and discusses puberty, feelings, relationships, etc.

I am posting here because I absolutely don't want said book to contain inaccurate and harmful gender ideology.

Can anyone recommend a good book?

What happening to me? Series by usborne books. I bought my boys the girls one as well because it's important to understand both sides.

Thanks. I thought Usborne could be a bit TWAW, but as long as the books themselves are factual, I don't mind. Good idea to get both versions - I hadn't thought of that.

I have the usborne boys version - though a much older edition as it was second hand. No gender ideology and a good book. I was warned off the girl version though as it focuses too much on hair removal/make up and is in danger of inadvertently conveying the message that being a woman = changing your appearance to look pretty for the men. So for DD I got a different book, i think it was written by Anita Naik

Thanks, I'll have a look for that author. Agree re negative messages about how women should look.

I got mine the Dr Ranj book. Havent given it yet because I havent finished going through it but it's seeming sensible so far.

I have just been looking at that online and the reviews are very positive. Please can you update if it turns weird?!

I’d like recommendations for the same sort of thing, so watching with interest.

I think Dr Ranj is great. He explains sex v gender; lots of talk of boys having penises and girls bleeding from their vaginas every month. The drawing even shows a clitoris LGBT includes "those who identify as transgender". There's some stuff on porn (v non-judgemental).
Seems reasonably sensible.

Thanks @PenguindreamsofDraco. That sounds v promising then. Does the gender explanation continue onto the next page?

It does, theres a perfectly reasonable about being transgender. I can photograph it in the morning.
The glossary jarred a little - sex is described as the gender you're born with and gender as the sex you identify with. But given whatever else is out there, I thought it was a decent book. And lots about mental health etc for boys, which i liked.

Thanks Penguin, I appreciate that.

That does sound reasonable - is it suitable for a 10 year old do you think?

I used “What’s Happening To Tom?”. It’s intended for autistic boys and there’s a girl’s version “What’s Happening To Ellie?”

They explain exactly what’s happening to a child going through puberty without the additional information more suitable for older children.

@Catabogus

That does sound reasonable - is it suitable for a 10 year old do you think?

Well my son is 10, and a young 10 at that, and a lot of it is certainly fine. I think it will grow with him - he needs to know the basics at this stage and the more detailed stuff we can go back over in more detail as and when. I have to say I liked it - the tone was nice and supportive.

The Lets Talk books by Robie Harris and Michael Emblerley are brilliant. There are 3, aimed at different age groups, and the middle one is probably the most detailed. Covers everything in a very accessible way with comics and pictures. I have an older edition (2014 I think) and there's nothing in it about transgenderism. Plenty about homosexuality though. Also covers masturbation, adoption, birth and puberty.

Thanks @MountainWitch, I’ll check this one out too.

@BakedBeansBang

Thanks *@PenguindreamsofDraco*. That sounds v promising then. Does the gender explanation continue onto the next page?

This is the follow on page.

Thank you. That is perfectly reasonable. Good old Dr Ranj!

I was specifically looking for this thread and recommendations as I remembered seeing it and I wanted to get a book for my DS.

It's worth mentioning that the Lets Talk book by Robie Harris and Michael Emblerley has been 'updated' when I looked at it, although it might only be the Kindle edition.
I've had a look at the sample and it's quite bizarre. It starts by acknowledging that sex and gender are different then goes down a weird gender rabbit hole.
It says babies who are born with a penis are 'most often' labelled a boy at birth and it also actually says Some babies are born with a mixture of male body parts and female body parts. If a person is born with that mixture, their sex is "intersex", which is the word that is often used to describe that mixture."
Then it starts going on about how birth certificates are a record of 'gender' which can be changed later and that parents can now choose gender 'X' as well as male or female on birth certificates in some states (is this true?). It also says gender identity is defined by the clothes we wear, the way we behave and the way we look, and keeps conflating gender and sex.
It's a right mess. Link here for anyone who wants to check it for themselves: www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B08LKL5ZRQ?tag=mumsnetforu03-21
(When I preview this, it appears with a mumsnet tag at the end of the link for some reason, but you can cut that off at the end of the B08LKL5ZRQ and still see it fine. What are the tags for?)

That's really disappointing. DD has the twentieth anniversary edition (not kindle) and none of that is in it.

There is a tiny (appropriate) section on transgender (4 paragraphs).

Everywhere it is very clear about what is different / the same between the sexes.

That Kindle version is terrible!

That Kindle version is terrible

More specifically apart from the obvious, it is really hard to understand what the author is saying (maybe unavoidable as it makes no sense). It's such a shame, I always thought the author was a sensible person who would stick to the facts.

I'm delighted to hear Dr Ranj is sensible, I've ordered the book for the 9yo.