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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Experience of being the child of a Trans parent?

19 replies

Dorian1984 · 19/12/2016 11:19

Apologies if I am in the wrong place but I am looking for members with trans parents - especially MTF as I am having a hard time with this at home :(

OP posts:
BeyondIBringYouGoodTidings · 19/12/2016 11:32

I'm sorry you are having a hard time. Is it you/your partner who is trans? In which case I know there is a board for LGBT parents. Or is it your own parent?

BeyondIBringYouGoodTidings · 19/12/2016 11:33

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/lgbt_parents

Original poster
Dorian1984 · 19/12/2016 11:44

its my own parent

OP posts:
Original poster
Dorian1984 · 19/12/2016 11:45

thank you for that link

OP posts:
BeyondIBringYouGoodTidings · 19/12/2016 11:53

If it's your parent then relationships might be a better place than LGBT parents, or here is fine too. I know there are a few posters in the feminism section whose lives have been impacted by transitioning family members.

BeyondIBringYouGoodTidings · 19/12/2016 11:54

I'm not one, so not sure how much help I can be, but would you like to get it all off your chest? :)

SelfCleaningVagina · 19/12/2016 11:57

Wouldn't it be better to put this in a more sympathetic topic, or go to one of the support forums designed specifically to help with this sort of issue?

If you know anything about MN at all then you will know that the Feminism board isn't going to be the best place to have a balanced discussion about your issue.

If you are not very familiar with MN then I can't imagine why you would have chosen Feminism to discuss this. Then again, if you do know MN and you still chose the Feminism board for this post then perhaps you knew exactly what you were doing.

Xenophile · 19/12/2016 13:16

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time, a parent transitioning must be a difficult experience for you.

I'd also recommend that you repost this in LGBT Parents, not because you won't get a fair hearing or unbiased information in FWR, but simply because they might know where you could best access targetted help. You could also try a group such as transgender trend, where there are lots of links to helplines for people in positions such as yours.

Sadly, it seems that SelfCleaning is unable to keep her ill informed views about people on FWR to herself and feels she has to repeat the equally ill informed views of other AIBU posters on here. A sham, but not unexpected, they do seem to be impervious to reason or sense in that forum.

Original poster
Dorian1984 · 19/12/2016 14:16

SelfCleaningVagina because there are similar threads in this section. I am pretty new so there is no hidden agenda

OP posts:
Prawnofthepatriarchy · 19/12/2016 15:05

In which case, if you've read previous threads here, Dorian, you may be in the right place. Would I be right in thinking you're not too pleased at losing a father and gaining a (second) mother?

Shallishanti · 19/12/2016 15:47

tell us more, Dorian
is that your birth year? do you have any brothers/sisters? what about other relatives if your parents generation?

Milliepede · 19/12/2016 16:27

First post here so hello everyone.
Have recently read this rather interesting article by a professor of paediatrics. It is fully referenced so might give you some proper information besides Mermaids' propaganda.
quadrant.org.au/magazine/2016/12/gender-dysphoria-child-surgical-abuse/.

Milliepede · 19/12/2016 16:29

Read ou r post incoreectly (that's toffee vodka for you). The article still provides pertinent information and links. Good luck anyway

Devilishpyjamas · 19/12/2016 16:33

Are you able to access counselling OP? It's a pretty big thing to deal with.

PoochSmooch · 19/12/2016 17:12

Don't be put off, Dorian, despite what some people might say, people here are quite capable of being supportive and helpful.

I'm not aware that there are any posters here who are in your situation, but perhaps your post will encourage some to come forward? I'm not aware of any specific resources for people in your situation, though I know a few for women who are or have been in a relationship with someone who comes out as trans if they would help at all?

The feminist writer Susan Faludi's father came out as trans - this article might be of interest?

BeyondIBringYouGoodTidings · 19/12/2016 17:20

There is a Facebook group for people whose family (they deal with both partners and children) have transitioned, I have seen it mentioned here before. I can't for the life of me think what it is called though, so hopefully someone with a better memory than me will know what I am on about!!

And I want to second that feminists are perfectly capable of providing sympathy! I hope that much is obvious Flowers

JillyBoel · 19/12/2016 17:44

Hi Dorian. I'm also going through this, although at an earlier stage (saw your other thread). I'm still trying to sort out my feelings about it.
I'm a veteran lurker on FWR, although not a contributor (insufficiently eloquent!), and have followed the evolution of the trans conversation over the last few years (and all the Spartacus stuff) so it was at least something which I had thought a bit about and had a view on, iyswim - not sure what your position is on it.
At the moment it's all fairly new, and the main point is that I love my father and he is currently happier than he's been in decades. But I don't know what I'll feel when there are bigger or more public changes.
I don't think that's very helpful, sorry Sad

Prawnofthepatriarchy · 19/12/2016 18:46

Thanks for the link, Millie. I've read it and bookmarked. Very interesting, particularly with it being packed full of references.

DameDeDoubtance · 20/12/2016 07:34

Dorian, do you have siblings who you can talk to as well? How is everyone around you handling the situation.

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