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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Facebook supports rape?

908 replies

MotherPanda · 04/10/2011 13:53

Have we a thread on this yet?

www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2011/oct/04/facebook-hate-speech-women-rape?newsfeed=true

I am really shocked.

OP posts:
giyadas · 08/10/2011 22:22

And it's not about who's mates with who. You do seem to come here to stir up a bit of drama, Custardo. I've always been disappointed that you don't identify as a feminist,(not that that's important, but I hope you know what I mean) as you show some very feminist characteristics, I've read your reasons and they make sense, and I can respect them, but I don't understand the hostility when you post here. It comes across as baiting.

Tortington · 08/10/2011 22:22

well frothy short of posting an equiv experience i will come across as nothing short of devoid of feeling. if i did post my experiences if would come across as competitive - lose - lose.

you said something really rubbish actually. and im not the only person to point it out. this shoudnt detract from yours mine or anyones life story. this shouldnt come across as competitive or belittling. we are all women who should actually be suppotting each other in their experiences,. but i simply coukdnt post anything here ever ever ever.

you posted somethng out of order and thats that

Tortington · 08/10/2011 22:23

actually ella you did suggest that i dont have my own mind and that i cannot be impartial.

which is clearly untrue

EllaDee · 08/10/2011 22:24

Fortunately, I did not. Re-read my posts, they are quite clear, and only occasionally mis-spelt.

Tortington · 08/10/2011 22:25

actually ella you did suggest that i dont have my own mind and that i cannot be impartial.

which is clearly untrue

DontCallMeFrothyDragon · 08/10/2011 22:26

What did I post out of order?

I'd rather have quotes so I know what I'm defending myself against, please?

EllaDee · 08/10/2011 22:27

Fortunately, I did not. Re-read my posts, they are quite clear, and a fair few of them actually discuss feminism and/or women's rights. Some only discuss bottling gin with cherries.

chibi · 08/10/2011 22:31

Is this like that time when river song couldn't kill the doctor and then time collapsed and shit kept happening over and over simultaneously and it was the same time forever?

StewieGriffinsMom · 08/10/2011 22:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DontCallMeFrothyDragon · 08/10/2011 22:32

Chibi, I suspect it is...

Tortington · 08/10/2011 22:32

actually ella you did suggest that i dont have my own mind and that i cannot be impartial becuase i am rhubarbs friend. which tbh is really rubbish acutally. becuase rhuabrb and i rarely agree on anything. in fact she is a feminist an i don't identify myself as one.

judging fro this thread thank god i din't identify with a siterhood who think that i cannot have a seperate opinion from my friend.

EllaDee · 08/10/2011 22:33

Possibly, chibi, possibly.

frothy - yes, I agree with SGM. Please don't let this get to you - it is not worth taking seriously (whereas you, and the original subject of the thread, are).

KRITIQ · 08/10/2011 22:33

Someone seems to be looking for attention tonight!

Tortington · 08/10/2011 22:33

SGM. and me? my pain? my experiences?

sisterhood my arse. no wonder i don't identify.

Tortington · 08/10/2011 22:34

sorry is that then competitive as i previously mentioned?

oh ignore my feelings them becuase i am attention seeking clearly

KRITIQ · 08/10/2011 22:35

Then don't let the screen door slam you on the butt as you leave the Feminism room.

EllaDee · 08/10/2011 22:35

custardo, for goodness' sake read my posts, you'll see what I said. You pretending to be another voice agreeing Rhubarb deserves an apology carries less weight when you are clearly not interested in the actual subject but only in your friend. It's not rocket science. Your opinion otherwise is doubtless fine, but if you'd cared about the actual topic, you'd have posted about it, not just about your mate.

DontCallMeFrothyDragon · 08/10/2011 22:36

SGM, I'm ok right now. Better than I have been, anyway. But I am stepping away, regardless, before I let rip. Thank you, btw :)

Tortington · 08/10/2011 22:36

its fine derail belittle whatever - make my posts seem insignificant.

say my words are not valid becuase

i am seeking attention
i am rhubarbs friend
i dont hold my own opinion
i am drunk!!!

cheers feminists.

StewieGriffinsMom · 08/10/2011 22:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tortington · 08/10/2011 22:39

many are dismissing my opinion.

its less valid apparently because i havent typed up a back story.

my story is MINE and my opinion is just as valid

giyadas · 08/10/2011 22:43

I posted a very reasonable post to you Custardo, but you ignored it in favour of starting a bunfight. I think that makes your motives clear.
I didn't dismiss your opinion, but you dismissed everything that you couldn't rail against.

Tortington · 08/10/2011 22:45

giyadas, i have had to defend myself against every other poster here. so please. please. don't say that i have ignored you, rather recogise that i have had to defend myself against muliple posters. and maybe my intenton wasnl;t actually to start a bunfight, and that maybe im really busy typing posts.

or it it easier to just say im the kinda person who starts bunfights? cos thats a bit mean no.>?

giyadas · 08/10/2011 22:49

I love your posts on the other parts of MN, but these posts just clash so much... I find it hard to reconcile them. I wasn't trying the 'easier to' option

DontCallMeFrothyDragon · 08/10/2011 22:55

Custardo, this is my last post on this thread, btw.

No one is dismissing your experience, regardless of how much or little of a backstory anyone has posted. I do feel sad that you've suffered. Very sad, in fact, to an extent I don't think you'd recognise.

I understand you and rhubarb are friends. But please. Don't let that be your sole reason for defending her. Read this thread as someone detatched from the people involved. Should I have posted something upsetting on this thread, I'd have expected the people I call friends, sisters or any other name (and they know who they are) to call me up on it. They would, and in my early days in this section, they frequently did. And I'm glad they did.

Please recognise that it is not helpful to tell a rape victim that there are "signs" that make a potential rapist noticable. It doesn't help. If anything, for a lot of people, it'll make things worse. I'm not sure how you felt internally about those posts, but they were the cause of my flashbacks. It may be worth noting that several people related their stories after that. Please approach this thread without the anger you seem to be feeling right now. It's natural that you may wish to support your friend. But would you really accept her telling you that you could have prevented your experience?

I wish you the best, and I never intended to belittle your experiences. I'm sorry you read my posts in such a manner. I merely tried to point out why myself, among so many people, had problems with what rhubarb had said, and why we responded the way we did.