Health Anxiety - Smear Test

[stressingOout]

looking for some perspective, and/or a kick up the arse. I’ll start by saying I have always had bad health anxiety.

Well, I’ve had ‘THE’ letter, summoning for my regular smear appointment. I’m not too worried about the appointment, I know they take minutes but I’ve convinced myself that the news will be bad. I can’t focus, I keep getting myself in such a tizz about how I’ll cope if I have to go back for regular follow-ups, or worse.

My others have been fine, but since my last, I have had chlamydia (a story for another day 😥) but now I think that because I’ve had an infection, I’m more likely to get HPV. Literally, convinced myself I’m going to die. Also, that because I’m being so negative about it, it’ll happen….as if I’m talking into existence.

My last was in September 2019 but I’ve already had the reminder letter. Im due to go on holiday in September and I’m convincing myself to leave it until I get back so that If it it bad news, I won’t be distraught on holiday and ruin it for everyone else.

how silly am I being on a scale of 1-10 (before anyone asks, I’m a fully grown woman! I’m not a child but I’m well aware that i sound so immature).

I daren’t voice my concerns irl but I’m torturing myself x

Get it done ASAP. Putting it off will only increase your anxiety. The imagination is a powerful thing and the not knowing is the worst!

I had an 'inconclusive' smear years ago, followed by and 'abnormal' one. Had to have a colposcopy. Turns out it was caused by inflammation due to HPV. I've never had an STI in my life. Over 90% of sexually active people get HPV at somepoint in their life, it doesn't mean cancer.

I had follow up smears every 3 months for a while, then every 6 months, then annually.... this went on for a few years before I was finally put back on the normal screening schedule. Never had HPV since (they specifically test for it now) and never had another dodgy result.

Long story short, put yourself out of your misery and just get it done, before your holiday. Then you can relax and enjoy it.

I have health anxiety too BTW, I deal with it by taking control, not avoidance. That's what works best for me.

@WhatIsModeration thanks for the taking the time to reply to me 🌸