On or off diets - need a happy medium

[Uphillanddowndale12]

Hi my pattern seems to be either on a diet or off it and put the weight back on. When I'm on a diet I stick to it with avidly, hardly ever wavering and lose all my weight getting down to a size 12 or 10. During a diet I get upset by the comments of friends and family (not dh) like "you're not getting anorexic are you?", etc. Then when I finish the diet I chuck all my big clothes out and buy new smaller ones and generally feel great. After about a month, I then get into a post diet mode of eating anything, almost like I need to prove to those critical friends and family that I've a normal healthy appetite, and before I know it the weight has gone on again and I'm back to a size 16.

I need to stop this pattern of good /bad, diet/no diet, obsession/abandon. It's obviously not working in the long term and it can't be doing me any good health wise and I'm sure my family and friends must think to themselves every time I go on a diet "here she goes again"

I want to lose weight but not in such an obsessive way.
Can anyone help? Does anyone else do this?

Anyone????

We bought the hairy dieters cookbooks, and found them great, plenty of tasty healthy recipes that don't seem like diet food at all. We have had friends request the recipes when they've come to dinner :)

I have decided to diet every second day. I hate being on a diet all the time. People say "oh just eat the right things!" but that doesn't work for me. I need to monitor what I eat. I've tried the 5:2 and it worked but it was so hard. I'm not doing it again. I have ten pounds to lose and in the last two years I've lost five pounds only to crack and go back up to 9 stone ten again.

So, looking for the same type of solution you're looking for I've decided to diet quite strictly every second day. This is my third day of keeping to 1000 calories. After the 5:2 it feels quite manageable! TOmorrow I will eat normally, still vaguely trying to be good.

So far, so good. Compared to 5:2 it feels like a breeze and I know that tomorrow will be normal. I don't over eat on my normal days. I think I eat healthily but clearly, I must be eating about 1.15 more than I need (approx). As I could do with losing a tenth of my body weight.

I will let you know how I get on if you like.

ps, I don't want to follow any particular diet, or buy diet books, but myfitness pal can be useful.

ps, what you said about ''proving you have a normal appetite'' strikes a chord with me.

It's as though, after months of deprivation, you want to try on that role of the naturally skinny person who can just eat, the sort of person who confuses you! There are a few at my work. I see them eat rounds of toast at 9am and 11 am then lunch then biscuits at 3 and then dinner with wine.

I think you (and I) need to accept that that's not us. It aint fair but it's how it is. I can't prove the unprovable!! I have to watch what I eat closely or I get fat. That's my truth.

Ps, I should mention I'm only 5'1". 9 stone ten probably sounds slim if you imagine I am about 5'7" but I assure you I look like a barrel at the moment.