Where do I even start with wedding dresses when all appts charge to look?

[datcherygrateful]

Hi everyone
I'm recently engaged and have no idea where to start when it comes to wedding dresses. This is my second marriage, my first one I walked into a local shop tried a few and went with what suited me best. I've come to discover I have to pay a fee just to look, and that's money I dont want to spend if my dress type is not there. I have emailed around but they don't answer. So I figured maybe buy online?
I'm looking for a bateau neckline plain column dress, that's structured and not flowey, really minimalist and I'll spend the money on tailoring to get it just right. Does anyone here have any tips or recommend shops in the UK that I can start with? I don't mind traveling as have time.

Thank you

What?! I never paid a fee or heard of anyone else paying a fee just to look!

I went shopping with SIL to be recently and she did have to pay a small fee to book an appointment. They’re quite time consuming, presumably it weeds out time wasters. Was not the same when I got married 15 years ago.

She did her homework on the stores in advance, looking at what they sold on their socials, so she could book the kind of places she liked the styles of.

It is unfortunate that a lot charge, but I know from a friend with a wedding dress shop (who doesn't charge) that there's a lot of people who don't show up, or just come for a morning out and a free glass or two of prosecco. Most smaller bridal shops are only open for appointments.

I would start with social media- if you know a couple of designers who do the minimalist style you like, you can Google for stockists in your area. They might not have your particular dress, but you can at least get a rough idea on shapes, etc. Try going onto Instagram and searching for various keywords, and just watch a few videos, like a few posts on those styles of dresses. That should give you recommended for you videos, which will give you designer names, and all of the wedding dress stores near you who pay for advertising will pop up too.

Try Wed2B. They didn't charge or need an appointment.

I can recommend a store in East Yorkshire if you're local to there. And I would message on social media, not email- because stock changes regularly, and it's not something people buy online, a lot of the shops don't seem to use a website, and emails are often missed. Social media is checked multiple times a day.

I suppose this is because people try on (taking up hours of staff time) then try to buy the same dress cheaper online? 15 years ago would be about the right time for that to happen, as I guess in the nineties internet shopping wasn't really a thing.
OP, as you've asked opinions, mine would be find the kind you like from pictures/guides etc, then contact shops to ask if they have Maggie Sottero dress type X, or whatever. Then you aren't wasting money as you know they'll have one you imagine you'll like.
Or don't they do sample sales days now? So if you're lucky, you can get a really nice dress half price.

The high street brands don’t charge. You can order a few on line and see what you like. MyTeresa, Netaporter and others do dresses you can just order. John Lewis too, Self Portrait, whistles etc all do wedding dresses.

The bridal shops have one size and curate about 8-10 for you to try on. You tell them in advance about what you like. It’s around £25-50 for an appointment. More if there’s loads of you. The dresses are not high street though so do your homework about brands first. Alterations might be £600 too so it’s a very expensive process.

Thank you everyone, do we know of any online retailers? I’ve called up a few boutiques and none have most neck column dresses, so I was thinking to scour the internet and just buy off there

Is this the kind of shape that you're after? If so, it's a relatively simple garment to make (if you're an experienced dressmaker!). As you're already considering getting something tailored and know exactly what style you're looking for I'd be tempted to find a dressmaker and get something bespoke.

https://www.ralphlauren.co.uk/en/crepe-off-the-shoulder-gown-100111178.html?dwvar100111178_colorname=Blue%20Note&cgid=women-clothing-jumpsuits#start=1&cgid=women-clothing-jumpsuits

@datcherygrateful Every retailer I listed is on line! You try on at home and can return if not right.

Rixo?
net a porter?
john Lewis?
reformation?

These are just a few from Whistles. Depends what your budget is really. These won’t break the bank but if you want a high end designer then it’s multiples of these prices.

These are Needle and Thread

23 years ago, I had to pay a local baby goods shop to go and look at their prams, so I don’t think this is a new phenomenon. They said it was because people come in, get lots of advice from staff, then go and buy cheaper online, even back then.

catherinedeane.co.uk ? They do modern bridal separates but I'm sure they will do a column skirt and possibly a bateau top.

If you know what you want, contact the shops first and ask if they have anything like it in stock? Then if they do, go and try on. Or maybe design it and see if you can have it made?

I went to wed2b as well

I found what I wanted online- all the designers have their full collection on their website. Found one that fit my very specific brief, found my nearest stockist of that brand- called them to check they had the dress I wanted to try on, they didn’t but were able to order it from the designer- we booked an appointment for a date after it had arrived. I did pay for the appointment but they knocked it off the price of the dress when I purchased it.

I bought a dress online from Needle and Thread for my second wedding. You could also have it made since you know what you want…?

You are better off finding the style you want, get the designer and find out which wedding shops near you stock their dresses.
they may be able to get the style you want. If you want a specific dress you will need months ahead to get it in, off the peg, is instant.
dont tie yourself to one style you’ll surprise yourself by falling in love with one.

Would this suit? https://www.thereformation.com/products/isabelle-silk-dress/1319645IVO.html?dwvar_1319645IVO_color=IVO

Some beautiful Vivienne Westwood on Net a Porter

but the price 🤑😵‍💫

Wed2be don’t charge

I agree that you could get something made to measure for less than a "proper" wedding dress would cost, due to the simplicity of the style.

Worth asking for recommendations for local dressmakers.

Another recommendation for Wed2Be. No appointment, walked in, walked out with a dress an hour later.