Which wedding would you choose?

[Usernamesarenotmyforte]

I was half tempted to post on AIBU but I’m too chicken.

We recently got engaged and were originally fairly set on getting married in 2021 (so our baby daughter will be a bit more aware of everything) with a medium ish sized wedding (about 60 guests), nice and relaxed with a lot of money saving DIY stuff.

However, we have also considered the possibility of getting married sooner (in the next year or so) with just close family and friends (15 including us) at a nice registry office with a lovely meal after.

I am completely torn. Originally I was so sure I wanted the first choice. Part of me thinks I still am and may just be freaking out about organising it. Money isn’t particularly the issue, beyond my lovely mother’s financially frugal nature having instilled in me a distrust of spending several thousand on one day...

I don’t want to ramble on so I guess I’m just interested to know what people would do/ might have done in similar circumstances and any words of wisdom.

I had both. A secret registry office wedding and a bigger one in a glamorous of settings on the Cote d Azur with a fabulous reception.

I can say that if I had to choose only one, the secret wedding would win. It’s just more intimate and you can focus fully on the moment ( and remember it all). My French wedding was utterly fab but you do miss things, there’s lots more worries in front of lots of people ( even if they are your best friends and family) and you spend so much time doing socialising rather than enjoying the experience. Not to mention the stresses of organising.

It’s also great spending less. Once the day is over you will appreciate not having spent it. The whole show really doesn’t matter as much as you think it might.