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Original poster

Mythical chocolate box village hall

33 replies

Usernamegone · 18/08/2015 22:15

My DP is driving me to distraction concerning his unrealistic wedding budget expectations. It was agreed that I would go and research wedding venues in/near Exeter which I did and then provided him with a shortlist to pick from. However, he claims that all the venues are too expensive but then goes on about 50 people is not enough (as he doesn't seem to realise that the more people you need to feed the more the price goes up). He keeps going on about having a village hall venue (which will apparently cost 50p to hire and £2.50 to feed 100 people). So I have told him to speak to his friends and will find out where this mythical village hall venue is, but apparently it is my job to find the venue! I have explained to him that I presume if you find an idyllic chocolate box village hall (when we live in a city) that you would need to arrange everything seperately including caterers? Is this correct? I have explained to him that I would rather go for a package as I have a really stressful long hours job which involves me travelling all over the country so I simply don't have time to organise everything separately or to spend weeks before the wedding hand making everything and days dressing the venue (and there is no local family to assist)
Can anyone let me know if you anyone is aware of any pretty village halls near exeter where the do everything for you or have contacts that will!

OP posts:
Lj8893 · 18/08/2015 22:20

I seriously doubt any village hall will do an entire wedding for you. I have never heard of it anyway!!

We did a DIY wedding (as in organised everything separately, handmade some bits and decorated the venue) it was very intense!!

RosesandRugby · 18/08/2015 22:25

Perhaps a wedding planner could help? I'm afraid I'm not local to you so I can't advise on anyone to use but they can arrange almost anything and will have all the contacts to plan it for you.
My friends wedding planner charged 5% of the total cost of the wedding which worked out at around £500 but she got everything she wanted within the budget she had set.

Alternatively try a local WI hall as an alternative and they should be able to help with catering too.

Original poster
Usernamegone · 18/08/2015 23:00

I don't want to spend 20k on a wedding or anything like what the wedding magazines quote for an 'average' wedding as that is madness. My ideal wedding would be to elope to Las Vegas/Gretna green and not invite anyone. However, DP is insistent that we get married locally as he wants to invite all of his family. Which I am ok with doing as long as I can book a venue I like. However, I have enough money that I have saved (not DP) to pay for a decent reception and my family are likely to help with the most of the rest of the cost of the wedding. It is simply that he doesn't spend more that an absolute minimum! I have been searching for 6 months and I can't find anything that is 'good enough' for him yet meets his price criteria!

Tbh I am the least artistic crafty practical person (and most unco-ordinated and clumsy person) in the whole world so making stuff and decorating venues is my worst nightmare on top of the 60 hour weeks I work!

OP posts:
G1veMeStrength · 18/08/2015 23:05

'apparently it is my job to find the venue!'

Says who? I'd tell DP I had delegated it to him. Cheeky fucker.

Original poster
Usernamegone · 18/08/2015 23:31

G1ve I told him earlier that if he didn't like the venues I had suggested he could go out an research his own and come back to me. I also suggested he speak to some of his friends who have apparently got married in these mythical village halls (where it is a chocolate box building but you can hire it and feed every one a three course meal with unlimited booze for 50p) and tell me where they had there reception!

OP posts:
marshmallowpies · 19/08/2015 08:05

I do know of someone who had their reception in a Scout Hut very cheaply - sounded idyllic, tea lights in jam jars, walking through woodland to get to the venue, lovely outside space - but the scout hut wasn't a cute little wooden cabin, it was a prefab building more like a classroom. Still, they got it very cheap and it looked like a lovely wedding.

emsyj · 19/08/2015 08:14

We almost hired a very nice village hall in a pretty village - it would have been £120 to hire including tables and chairs and you could get a caterer or provide your own food and drinks. We cancelled it after visiting and realising it was smaller than we expected and it wouldn't have fitted all our guests in. Eventually we hired a former town hall owned by the council. They don't advertise it for hire but I made a few phone calls and they did offer it for hire, it cost 500 quid including kitchens, main hall with tables and chairs, separate room for laying out the evening buffet and no restrictions on bringing your own food or using a caterer. We had a caterer in who did 3 courses with choice at the table for 17.50 a head plus evening buffet for 6 quid a head. We had to use the venue's bar but it was really cheap - we bought our own wine and they charged us 3 quid a bottle corkage and for that the licensee came with a van and collected it from our house the day before, chilled the stuff that needed chilling, provided glasses, service and jugs of iced water and laid out prosecco ready for welcome drinks. Overall it was as cheap as you could find for a beautiful old building with good food and unlimited booze. Try local civic buildings rather than village halls, and ring he council if there's a building you like that does not immediately appear to be for hire.

BikeRunSki · 19/08/2015 08:20

The WI in Dh's village (not near Exeter) used to do this for local school, (v chocolate boxy village too), but stopped before we got married because they got fed up of people thinking they could feed 100 for £2.50 a head. They would have done it for us (MIL is WI county president or something) but neither of us wanted to get married there.

artyone · 19/08/2015 08:32

I had a village hall wedding and it was cheaper than a package place would have been but still by no means cheap. Also had to rope in family and friends as it didn't come with any staff to pour toast drinks etc. food was separate, booze was separate, we had to decorate ourselves. I did love it though, it was just the way I wanted it.

Gooseberrycrumble2 · 19/08/2015 08:34

I think it's really doable but silly that it's your responsibility.

  • firstly post on various local Exeter FB town page asking for names of attractive village halls/woodland huts with kitchen and outside area. Ask tourist information also. Google, then drive round all the suggested locations. Peep through windows to nail it down. Arrange to see the inside of the ones you like.
  • buy a barrel of beer for 100. Buy pimms on offer after the summer. Buy some prosecco on offer.
  • you could cater by asking people to bring a dish. Meat salad cake.
  • or arrange for a company to provide a hog roast salads cakes
  • decorating - bunting, t lights in jars, table cloths, flowers in jars on tables, music on CD's, disco? You could ask your bridesmaids and best men to help with this.

Hire the venue for two days to allow for cleaning up dishes, sticky floors etc.

artyone · 19/08/2015 08:34

We got our hall for free, through family connections. But we paid about £10 per head for food and £400 total for booze. We had just under 100 people

Gooseberrycrumble2 · 19/08/2015 08:35

Town halls and church halls also could work

artyone · 19/08/2015 08:36

We decorated with hops (September wedding), flowers in beer bottles from families' gardens, candles, balloons.

CheddarGorgeous · 19/08/2015 08:43

DSS had an afternoon tea type thing in their village hall, before going on to a restaurant for the wedding breakfast proper.

It was very pretty but only after hours and hours of intensive decoration with home made / eBay sourced bunting, tablecloths, crockery, table decorations. Honestly, DDIL is the most creative, artsy, productive person I know and she only pulled it off with a lot of hard work and everyone pitching in.

Village hall did not provide any catering, cleaning, set up, we did it all. All the guests cleared the tables at the end and swept up etc.

PM me if you want a link to the blog which covers it. It was beautiful and on a budget but it was a LOT of work by the couple.

CheddarGorgeous · 19/08/2015 08:44

Oh, and your DHTB is behaving like an arse.

Nolim · 19/08/2015 08:49

So I have told him to speak to his friends and will find out where this mythical village hall venue is, but apparently it is my job to find the venue!

This would really irritate me.

itsraininginbaltimore · 19/08/2015 08:57

Why don't you look at booking out a section of a really village pub? Yes you'll have to have caterers, they possibly have their own, but it needn't be a big sit down affair, you can go a lovely but casual and low key buffet with informal seating like a garden party type thing. That is a good compromise I think, cheaper than a swanky hotel or function suite with a fancy meal.

I think he's being a twat if he expects you to use your savings and do all the donkey work to provide the kind of wedding HE wants. He needs a good talking to about that.

MrsAukerman · 19/08/2015 08:59

And if his mates had weddings at these places then surely you were there???!!!

Pootles2010 · 19/08/2015 09:01

I think best village hall wedding i've seen is where they basically put the inside of a marquee, inside a village hall, you know the drapey bits? So all the vile wallpaper/curtains etc are just covered up. Then prettify from there.

But it's still going to look like a village hall from outside, and you're going to have to organise everything, which doesn't sound like what you want.

Spickle · 19/08/2015 09:07

How about a pub that has a private room for hire. Friends of ours did this and it was lovely. Staff at the pub decorated the tables, served bubbly for the toasts and served our meal. There was wine and water on the tables and after that you bought your own drinks. The couple organised a DJ in the evening plus there was a small buffet for evening guests. No idea of the cost exactly but surely must be cheaper than one of those all day wedding packages at a country house and considerably less effort than having to decorate the hall yourselves and supply food and drink.

itsraininginbaltimore · 19/08/2015 09:16

To be honest any nice, small village pub will probably be only to happy to allow you to take over the whole place for the night without charging you for it if it's in a location where evening business is very slow. They'll be grateful for the bar sales and may let you provide the food separately. You can find a small local caterer to do a nice buffet, or hire a hog roast van and ask some relatives and friends to provide bowls of salads and side dishes.

Gooseberrycrumble2 · 19/08/2015 09:37

Pub sounds a great compromise

Buttercup27 · 19/08/2015 09:44

If you want an all in one package Google licenced wedding venues Devon and the county council should have a webpag7with all venues (glos does).
You would be really surprised at the variety of places and price ranges available. We got married in a v large independent school built in the 1900s and it was really reasonably priced.

Gooseberrycrumble2 · 19/08/2015 09:51

www.fivebells.uk.com/ABOUT-US/24/Frequently-Asked

Caters for up to 50 midweek. You could let everyone buy their own drinks.