Bridesmaid of a certain age - WYO ?

[4x4]

It makes me wince but a friend has asked me to be a bridesmaid . There will be several , all in the 38-40 age bracket.
I have four kids under 4 , look dumpy and haggered.TBH I would rather not .Am I being horrid ?

I didn't even think about photographs :0
Was just fretting at the thought of all going into coast and trying identical dresses :0

Are you all crepey hags? Because a bride who values qualities other than decorative ones will, I hope, have a long and happy marriage.

Homage to all the lovely MN crepeys; not insult.

At this age I would flatly refuse to wear identical dresses.

I saw some grown up bridesmaids (all in 30s, with kids) and they all had the same colour dresses (a sort of Mint Velvet pinky/greige), long, elegant, but not massively bridesmaidy. They all had different necklines/bodices etc and looked very lovely.

I think I'll offer to host a fab hen night instead.
I though bridesmaids by tradition are unmarried . None of these ladies are and I suspect all a little reluctant.
My own bridesmaids were nieces aged 5-10 years. I had not wished any but ML asked and actually it made the day as they were so excited and lovely.

Could be a lovely opportunity to have a bit of a makeover, new hairdo, lovely flattering dress?

If you aren't comfortable then don't do it. I was asked by a friend couple of years ago and regretted saying yes almost immediately. It really damaged our friendship, which is a great shame. I am a good decade older than her and I was on steroids at the time which made me massively fat. I was put in stilettos (non-negotiable despite my being an amazon and also on the waiting list for spinal surgery), a strapless purple chiffon dress that was SO unflattering (I nearly cried when I saw it) and hooker make-up that made me look like a rugby mate of the grooms that had invaded the photographs in drag!! I was also on opiates for weeks afterwards from the damage the shoes did to my back...

I'm with Sissy.....could be a lovely opportunity x