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Original poster

Candlelit church wedding

53 replies

GW297 · 08/09/2012 23:03

My friend has asked me to help her plan her wedding. They want a small, understated affair in a little church they have found by candlelight for about 50 guests. There is a short walk to a hotel for the reception. They want fireworks and a singles table with male/female singles sitting alternately.

Did you have a wedding similar to this or have you attended one? What made it special/fun?

OP posts:
Chubfuddler · 08/09/2012 23:05

Weddings in churches have traditionally had to be held in daylight hours, so I'm not sure that what your friend has in mind is possible.

joanofarchitrave · 08/09/2012 23:05

Sounds gorgeous, but just a question, is the wedding in the UK? I thought UK weddings had to be during the hours of daylight? Though many churches get v dark before the sun goes down I guess.

4goingon14 · 08/09/2012 23:06

I believe there are regulations in the UK that the vows must be said before 6pm. So I guess in the depth of winter when it gets dark at 5pm it would be possible...

Original poster
GW297 · 08/09/2012 23:09

Thank you for your responses. She is thinking mid February time and late afternoon...

OP posts:
CointreauVersial · 08/09/2012 23:11

My cousin had a similarly dark/wintery wedding. The dress/ties/flowers were all in purple/berry shades which went beautifully with the candlelit atmosphere.

wonkylegs · 08/09/2012 23:14

A friend had a Feb late afternoon/early eve wedding where it was dark & candlelit in the church. It was very pretty although also very cold.

Original poster
GW297 · 08/09/2012 23:18

Purple/berry shades sounds beautiful.

OP posts:
Bue · 09/09/2012 16:41

The ceremony sounds lovely but please ask your friend to reconsider the singles table! I'm sure it's with the best of intentions but no one likes to be used as a matchmaking experiment. I'd suggest she put half the singles at one table and half at another, along with some couples. That way it's not so darn obvious.

Original poster
GW297 · 09/09/2012 18:18

Bue - thank you. I will ask them if they might reconsider, but I think she thinks that all their single friends are ok with it.

OP posts:
fivegomadindorset · 09/09/2012 18:20

We went to a 5pm wedding on New Years eve once, lots of ivy and candles.

CointreauVersial · 09/09/2012 18:59

The worst thing you can do to a single at a wedding is stick them onto a table where everyone knows everyone, or worse, next to Aunty Gladys. I think putting them all onto one table sounds like a good plan.

Original poster
GW297 · 09/09/2012 19:02

I think she is pretty set on having a singles table, but as it's quite a small wedding I'm not sure how many singles there are going to be!

OP posts:
fivegomadindorset · 09/09/2012 19:07

Singles table sounds awful, sorry.

joanofarchitrave · 09/09/2012 19:07

I have been on a singles table at a wedding, i really enjoyed it, though I must say half the table already knew each other which helped as well.

cookielove · 09/09/2012 19:13

We had a singles tables, not because we wanted to set them up, but because it just worked out easier that way. They were all fine with it, as it's only a couple hours any way.

My wedding was last Saturday and was smallish 42 adults day around 65 altogether in the evening. We kept it personal by doing alot of the things are selves.

We had thistles, white roses, blue flowers and berries in the bouquets, those kind of colours would lovely in candle light.

The candles sound lovely, but as some one pointed out earlier it will probably be cold. In one of the many wedding magazines i read, a bride had set up in a basket a stack of pashmina's for the guest to keep themselves warm, i thought that was a lovely idea!!

Original poster
GW297 · 09/09/2012 19:15

I have mixed feelings about the singles table. Another friend of mine went to a wedding where there was a singles table and met a gorgeous Irish guy, which is what gave us the idea in the first place. joanofarchitrave - thank you for sharing your positive feedback from personal experience. Did anyone pair up?!

She is thinking cornflower blue bridesmaids dresses and ending the night with hot chocolate liquors after the fireworks! I feel as though I am not being much help, as I don't have many ideas, which is why I thought I'd start a threat on MN.

OP posts:
CatOnAHotTinFoof · 09/09/2012 19:17

I wouldn't mark out the singles table - that would quite patronising. But I agree with Cointreau otherwise.
Candlelight sounds lovely. But it might be a bit wearing if the reception was candelit too.

Original poster
GW297 · 09/09/2012 19:25

cookielove - I love the pashmina idea! Congratulations on your wedding last week. I hope you both had a lovely day.

CatOnAHotTinFoof - the Reception is not going to be candlelit too as far as I know.

I am so pleased I will be able to offer some helpful suggestions and ideas when I see her later this week like everyone else!

OP posts:
D0G · 09/09/2012 19:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cookielove · 09/09/2012 19:34

We had the most amazing perfect wonderful day Grin

We had a bouncy castle which probably isn't in keeping with your friends wedding, but it was brilliant, there is many a photo of me and my bridesmaids and other guests on it.

Yes i think is best to keep the reception with normal lights.

If it is a short walk from wedding to reception could you continue the theme of candles and using jam jars with tea lights in decorated with shell buttons on string dotted along the path ways?

Original poster
GW297 · 09/09/2012 19:54

A bouncy castle would be so much fun!!! I love the tealight path way!!! So glad I asked for ideas now!!! Thank you.

OP posts:
FeersumEndjinn · 09/09/2012 20:05

We went to a late wedding in early January which was like this - it was Up North so even darker than it would have been in the south. It was really lovely - but yes the vows have to be made "during office hours". I'm sure it will be amazing - good luck!

LittlePicnic · 10/09/2012 06:54

I thought there had been a change in law so you can marry at any time of the day? Not sure whether churches agree, but just read an article discussing weddings at midnight!! Not for me but interesting.

Original poster
GW297 · 10/09/2012 09:17

I don't think everyone will be able to stay awake until midnight!

OP posts:
Keepthechangeyoufilthyanimal · 13/09/2012 17:21

I'm unsure about the legalities of marrying when dark.
We had a winter wedding (In England) and IIRC we legally had to be married before 5pm but I could be wrong so definitely worth advising your friend to investigate further.
I am very jealous that you have been asked to help organise a wedding - I am gagging for a task like that at the minute!
Everything you have suggested so far sounds lovely!

A couple of ideas/things to bear in mind off the top of my head:
Drinks and canapes reception after ceremony - we had hot winter pimms (so yummy!) and hot chocolates with cream & snowflake shaped marshmallows. Both of which went down very well! (Also had beers, wines, soft drinks etc but the warming drinks were very welcome!)

We got married at 2pm and it was dark by 4pm so limited time for outdoors photos (although we planned it this way as we wanted to limit the time outside due to the snow and cold for guests!)
As it got dark so early a lot of people got in the night time party mood early on.
Evening buffet was hot roast pork with stuffing and apple sauce in bread buns which went down extremely well! (Would have gone for hog roast but was about 3x more expensive and couldn't rely on weather being ok to do it outside) These were received very well!

As there are so many christmassy themed decorations etc in the shops we didn't need or have any flowers which saved us a fortune! (although we didn't have a christmas wedding - it was January so didn't have xmas trees and the like)
In terms of decorations we had lots of fairy lights, candles, silk flowers and wicker garlands, hearts and wreaths.
We had a subtle snowflake theme, which we incorporated on the invites & favours & little features like tea lights around the venue
Lots of diamante/glittery bits in the day made it all sparkly and wintery. e.g. my dress, table decs. etc.
Helped by the fact that we had snow on the ground for the day!

um... can't think of anything else just now but feel free to ask me any questions - I am obsessed with weddings, especially winter ones!

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