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Weaning

Find weaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Weaning forum. Use our child development calendar for more information.

Original poster

Hv advised to wean early, but want to BLW.

42 replies

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 22/01/2009 19:24

My ds is 21 weeks and I am not convinced he is ready to wean.
My HV says I should start as he is not gaining enough weight and dropping down the percentile chart.
I have a dd (nearly 2) but she never saw a health visitor, so I had no idea if she was gaining 'appropriatley' I went on instinct and she is/was fine.

However for some reason I am doubting myself, as hv said my BM must be 'poor' quality and I should feed him.

Firstly I felt hurt and insulted by the comment of my BM being shite poor quality, secondly my ds can't even sit up unaided yet, never mind pick up food and find his mouth accuratley. (suprised HV didn't check this first tbh)
I really wanted to wait till 6 months and blw.

I am under the impression if my ds really is hungry then surely there are more calories in BM than in the tiny amounts of food I would be offering him.
I have offered the smallest amount of food, although he seemed to enjoy the expereince IYKWIM, he still has the tongue thrust reflex and pushes it back out.
It doesnt seem natural to just keep trying to shovel it in.
So what advice would you give if he isnt gaining enough weight with BM.
Sorry for waffling
TIA

OP posts:
constancereader · 22/01/2009 19:27

Your breast milk is NOT poor quality.

I think you are right to wait. There are more calories in breast milk, you are right!

Talk to a bf counsellor about adding another feed, or switch feeding.

PetitFilou1 · 22/01/2009 19:27

I'm no help as have started early but shall watch with interest

macaco · 22/01/2009 19:27

not an expert on bf at all, having only managed 2 months of mixed feeding but I wouls say it sounds like you are right nad he's not ready to wean. More frequent bf? Have you tried posting this on the breast and bottle threads and asking for tiktok's advice?

PortAndLemon · 22/01/2009 19:28

What has his weight actually been doing?

I strongly suspect, however, that you're right and she's wrong. She sounds to be going altogether too much by the charts and altogether too little by your DS himself.

If he's gaining some weight and is happy, healthy, alert, etc., then I'd ignore her, keep up the bf, and try BLW at or very close to six months.

PortAndLemon · 22/01/2009 19:29

(well, she definitely is wrong about the "poor quality" bit. My suspicions are in relation to her being completely and thoroughly wrong on all points)

FCH · 22/01/2009 19:33

I don't think I know any babies who have really followed the centile charts, most of them seem to bounce up and down through the lines at various times. I think the relevant question is how healthy do you think he is? It can't be a good thing to be obsessing about his weight if he is gaining steadily (even if slowly) - but I'm not an expert - I'm sure one will be along soon.

Original poster
no1putsbabyinthecorner · 22/01/2009 19:38

HI pf
Thanks, He is almost 22 weeks, and at last weigh in (2 weeks ago) he weighed 15Lb 9oz. The last weigh in 4 weeks previously he weighed 14lb 10oz.
She said it wasnt as much as they would like. He started above 75th and dropped to below 50th.
Yes he seems fine to me, and I know I am probably doing the right thing, but was just interested to see if anyone was in the same position. I had already been through this and told myself to ignore her (thanks pf et al) but I just keep thinking that what if he is hungry and my BM is not enough???
Obviously don't want him losing weight or going hungry.

OP posts:
PortAndLemon · 22/01/2009 19:48

If you look at the growth chart specifically for breastfed babies (who tend to put weight on faster than formula fed babies to begin with and then level off and put it on more slowly) then it looks to me as though he's barely dropped centiles at all -- perhaps from just above 50th to just below 50th?

ChairmumMiaow · 22/01/2009 19:49

no1 - I'm not an expert but I'd definitely go and get a second opinion. Can you try another HV? Ours run drop in sessions and you can go to any in the area.

I went to a different HV because I happened to be at a BF group with one attached and got a lecture about iron levels - but my normal HV never said a word.

Has your DS had a cold or any other sort of illness over the last few weeks? My DS dropped centiles at about 9 - 10 months when he was ill for a week. Haven't had him weighed since but I'm willing to bet he's regained his centile line.

Saying your BM is "poor quality" based on a drop in centiles alone seems extremely dodgy, and on the basis of that statement I'd discount her advice generally and get some more, as I said.

mothersmilk · 22/01/2009 19:49

hi there iv just posted a thread on breast and bottle about how little hv ad gp's know about bf as a breastfeeding helper today i had three ladies all in your postion all with babies under 6months all being told by the hv to top up or wean early because they either didint have enough milk or it wasnt good enough if your baby seems healthy happy and content keep feeding on demand and wait your bm is all he needs its got everything there for him and is the best thing on the face of the earth for him!!
my bf ds was born at 8lb now at 20 weeks weighs 15ld 13oz he's always been up down and all over the place on his charts i personally think we weigh babies too much (thats my personal opinion though some will dissagree)

kittywise · 22/01/2009 19:54

no1, don't worry, you are right she is wrong.

My last baby was born on 75th and spent the next six months free falling down to the 9th and HV was all a quiver. Skinny as a bird he was.
He's still doesn't like food much, loves his milk. I just let him get on with it!

Original poster
no1putsbabyinthecorner · 22/01/2009 19:55

feel silly now, yes he has had cough and cold since december, as has dd.
HV says as his birth weight was over 10lb he is hungry.

Will try to forget what she said and carry on as i am and wait.
Thanks

OP posts:
Original poster
no1putsbabyinthecorner · 22/01/2009 19:58

What really annoys me with some hv ia that there is so much conflicting advice.
One hv said chart was based on ff, and one said it was based on bf and ff babies.
No wonder some people doubt what they are doing.

OP posts:
kittywise · 22/01/2009 19:59

Don't feel silly!

HV seem to know just how to stir things up and make you feel inadequate!

I remember mine saying something along the lines of "Well we don't line them to drop down more than three lines from their birth line"

Obviously this isn't a guidline written by babies

I've had fat babies get skinny, skinny babies get fat, fat babies stay fat and skinny babies stay skinny!

PortAndLemon · 22/01/2009 20:01

Old/normal chart is based on babies with undifferentiated feeding (i.e. some bf, some ff). However, given bf rates most of those will have been ff at least after the first few weeks.

JollyPirate · 22/01/2009 20:02

As a HV can I say your HV is a loon. YOU are right - far more calories in breastmilk than in tiny bits of pureed stuff.

I post on here regularly that too many HVs have NO idea how to interpret centile charts.

Babies are weighed so much that we pick up every tiny little aspect of their growth and many HVs seem under the impression that if a baby is on one centile when born they should remain there. What they SHOULD be realising is that the centile a baby lies on at birth often bears NO relation to the one they are following at 12 months.

You are right and your HV is wrong. Ignore her and carry on with what you are already doing.

Poor quality milk indeed - it's designed for your baby and your HV knows NOTHING about breastfeeding.

mothersmilk · 22/01/2009 20:02

thats all iv been ranting about today sorry its really p#*!ed me off no wonder breastfeeding percentages are so low when women are led to believe that there milk isnt good enough or they dont have enough.
you'd think they all get the same training there for they should a work by the same rule unfortunatly this seems not to be the case

mothersmilk · 22/01/2009 20:05

jollypirate can i come work along side you as a bf helper you talk alot more sense than my hv

Original poster
no1putsbabyinthecorner · 22/01/2009 20:07

jollypirate thankyou. I hope you didnt think i was generalising about all hv. Thats why i said some mothersmilk i too would think the training would be the same for all.

OP posts:
MarlaSinger · 22/01/2009 20:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JackBauer · 22/01/2009 20:10

She sounds like she is using the wrong charts (again) BF chart and FF chart are very different.
Plus at that age they are a bit more active so are burning up more calories than when they were a cute little lump taking up floor space!

warthog · 22/01/2009 20:12

what utter bolleaux!

my dd1 dropped from 90th centile to 25th and hv was twittering about weaning / not gaining weight. but if you looked at her you could see she was a really healthy, fat, happy little baby.

so i stopped taking her for weigh-ins and blw'ed her at 6 months. never looked back.

i don't weigh dd2 now either. i know she's smaller than her peers. i make small babies! get over it hvs'.

Original poster
no1putsbabyinthecorner · 22/01/2009 20:23

Think I may stop going to weigh in.

OP posts:
moondog · 22/01/2009 21:19

Shame on that HV.
Shame on her.
What a scandalous disgrace!

'poor quality'

Fuck me.
And they wonder why this country has exacrable breastfeeding rates when the very people meant to support it are subverting it like this by talking shit.

No!, ignore her (but put in a formal complaint about her).

hellymelly · 22/01/2009 21:33

I would ignore her,really.My eldest started at the 50th and dropped to the 25th where she has remained,pretty much.She had very little in the way of solids until 7m and she was clearly healthy,chubby little legs,never ill,she looked fine and she was fine and so is yours by the sound of it,hv talk a load of rubbish most of the time,I have only met one really sensible one!