confusion over when to give milk/ meals with BLW - DS not progressing!

[VandT]

I know I shouldn't but I am getting quite stressed out by the fact that DS who is just 8 months hasn't really progressed with his eating. I know I should probably relax, and that its about fun and exploration, but I can't help worrying when I hear of so many other babies gobbling down food (both pureed' and BLW babies!). He is not at all fussy in terms of tastes, but rarely puts more than 1 or 2 pieces of food in his mouth, and more often than not throws it on the floor without eating a thing. He will sometimes let us hand feed him a couple of things, but at other times will adamantly shake his head at the sight of food, just not interested. He will however eat breakfast - banana/porridge.
I am wondering if it could be due to timings, when do other BLW give lunch/ tea? after milk/ before? how long between meals etc - would be a real help if I could have some advice...

I try to treat the two things separately - so I feed milk on demand but give three 'meals' (ie opportunities!) with soilds a day, breakfast at about 8 (in practise this is always after milk as I always feed her when she wakes) lunch between 12 and 2 depending on when she naps, and tea at about 5.30. The milk feeds are still anywhere from 5 to 9 times in 24 hrs...

It has taken me a while to get to a place, mentally, where I just trust that she will eat when and what she needs as long as I make it available...

It sounds like your son is doing pretty well, remember whatever your approach you can't force him to eat!

oh I should have said my dd is 8 months this week and has literally just started eating more than a trivial amount this week (hope i haven't jinxed it)...she has just done her first solid (ish) poo!!! [proud]

ds is 8 months and still not eating much.

he only eats at dinner and will do so irrelevant of whether he has a belly full of milk or not.

he refuses to eat any other meal unless it's pancakes or french toast!

i'm not worried yet and won't be for some time... as long as he's getting enough milk and is exploring his food that'all that concerns me

thanks, as you say (caughtintheact), it is probably more about me getting to a place mentally where I can relax and let him take the lead. The re-emerging panic has a lot to do with spending Easter with my mum who kept on saying 'it is just so much easier when they are on 3 meals a day', and advising me to cut down on his milk... argh. Having felt confident and relaxed about it all the doubts began to creep in... (but tbh I also do worry about what will happen if he continues like this after the age of 1 - i.e, what about iron etc..?)

i don't have time to answer fulsomely but have a look at the FAQ section of the www.babyledweaning.com blog and you'll see that a lot of the yahoo mums found their babies didn't really get the hang of it til about a year (in the 3 meals a day sense). you are making me giggle a bit about the fact that you're worrying already that he won't have changed by a year. that's a whole half-lifetime away for him, he's only had 8 months on the planet so far... imagine i said to you that i didn't think you'd change over the next 15 or so years. (actually i'd be thrilled, but you take my point i hope.)

yes, put that way it makes me giggle too! I will check out the link. over the last 24 hrs we have discovered that he is a far happier and better eater 'en famille' - won't tolerate being in his highchair on his own, but if is brought up to the table and we eat at the same time, its a different story.