Cutting out morning feed for grumpy toddler?

[ShirleyEllis]

My 21 month old is down to one breastfeed in a 24 hour period - the morning one, usually at 5am. I hope that if we cut this out he might start sleeping through til 6am.

He usually feeds for about twenty minutes and then about 60% of the time falls back to sleep in bed with me (the rest of the night he's in his own room) for about 45 minutes (90 if we're lucky!). He's happy when he wakes up the second time and I don't offer more milk. The other 40% of the time I can't get him to go back to sleep so we're up for the day (and he's grumpy!).

I am apprehensive about dropping this morning breastfeed as he always wakes up in a massive rage first thing and it's the one thing that makes the start to our day calmer.

I have visions that the only way to get through this is by taking him straight down to breakfast but I just worry that every day is going to start with a huge tantrum and it will be tricky to calm him down enough to eat. I'm also so reluctant to say goodbye to that precious extra time in bed!

I would love to continue having cuddly mornings in bed but think if I do this he will go even more nuts as he will just expect a breastfeed.

Any advice? Anybody been in a similar situation and survived?!

I am on my own with him so there's nobody that can take him in the mornings instead.

I'd like to have him off this last feed within a month if poss.

I’m not sure that if you cut it out he’ll start sleeping longer tbh.
Is there a reason other than that that you want to stop?
DD was formula fed but still had morning milk at that age (just cows milk in a cup)

What I mean is it might be best to wait til he naturally drops it or at least shows signs of taking it or leaving it

Thanks for replying! It's mostly that I know he's not getting enough sleep when he wakes at 5am and wonder if he's waking at 5am FOR the milk? But also that I am ready to give up the breastfeeding myself now.

Ah ok fair enough. If you didn’t want to stop then I’d say just keep it up, then everyone gets some extra time in bed!
I’d say if you want to stop and he won’t go back to sleep with a cuddle, then getting him up and about prob only option.
I’d like to say they grow out of the early rising but my 3yo was up at 5.45 for no good reason!

Thanks Lorna! Sounds like I have to bite the tantrummy bullet!

Ha yep, indeed. Good luck! I hate the early mornings, both of mine are pretty early risers, but also occasionally sleep til 7 or 8. I was the same when younger so just karma really!

My DS 20 months also wakes in a rage, between 5 and 7. It takes 2 cups of cows milk to placate him. Sometimes he'll go back to sleep. Sometimes it's an early start.

Sorry a bit late but just saw this and thought I would post as I went through something very similar with DS at almost exact same age. If you search my username you might find a post from me about it!! Basically I went cold turkey and started offering him a cup of cows milk and a cuddle in bed instead then we would get up after 20 mins. It was really hard for the first 10 days or so - if you find my thread you’ll see that I thought he would never sleep past 5am again or forgive me for stopping his feed. But then it just clicked, he stopped asking, accepted the milk and in fact started to sleep until gone 7 and has done pretty reliably ever since (now 3.5). You may have already started but just wanted to give you my experience in case you are finding it tough and some hope that you may even end up with more sleep in the long run. But be prepared for it to be tough, I hadn’t factored in the hormonal/emotional side of dropping that last feed and I think that’s why I was struggling when I posted but like you I was ready to stop and it was the right decision for us. Good luck.