10 month old has no interest in solid food

[IntrepidDad]

She started out quite good at six months taking puree on a spoon as long as she helped but within weeks she started clamping her mouth shut. So we started giving her finger food - often what were having. She would bite a little off but mainly just play with it.

Over the last three months there has been little progress. Her finger skills have improved a lot but the food mainly gets spat out and very little gets eaten. It is mainly smeared around as a new abstract art form. She has recently learned to shake her head as well as clamp her mouth if I try and offer any food at all.

We have tried all kinds of foods and always sit with her eating together. Even at times eating with out hands or out of the same bowl as her. But nothing has helped.

She never took to a bottle and is exclusively breast feed. She is following her weight curve well so the health visitor says there is no issue. The problem is my wife returns to work in the New Year and I am not sure how our daughter will deal with her food source disappearing!

Is she going to a childminders/nursery when your wife returns to work? They can often eat really well in childcare compared to at home, due to seeing their peers and joining in.

Are you doing food about an hour after a milk feed, so she's not too hungry but not too full?

It will be me looking after her. We moved breakfast to an hour or so after her morning feed but that didn't result in any real improvement sadly. Lunch and dinner tend to be about two hours after a feed.

Does she ever eat with other children? I think that's why they eat at nursery/childminders, because they copy other children.

She doesn't generally eat around other children. I am not quite sure how we would make that happen in the short term either.

She will change, you dont need to worry. Once the breastmilk is not available all day long, she will start eating food.

DS wouldn't eat until he could feed himself at ten months. Water biscuits and poppadoms - he wanted crunchy sensations, never, ever let a spoon of purée in his mouth. Still like that at ten YO! Going to child minder got him eating in the end.

Try some textures, you have a while. It's hard work though

If you're going to be looking after her, I would try yo take her out to eating places now and then. Cafés, play dates with other children, softplay etc. She may just need to see food in a social setting.

My youngest refused to be fed. At 8 months he would shout for his older brother's plate. In the end, I just gave them both identical food, and he fed himself. He just copied his brother.

I know it's hard, but try not to worry.

I wouldn't worry, babies main source of calories under a year is milk. Food is for then to enjoy, don't make it a battle now. DS didn't really eat until 10/11 months. We sat at a table and ate together, he had a bowl with the same food as us (minus any chilli or salt) and got the hang of it in the end.

Does she drink milk from a cup or bottle? As impossible as it seems, she will be fine. One option is that to start with she will just have most of her calories when your wife is there. This might be a nightmare for your wife if she feeds lots at night. But she should quickly realise breastmilk I not an option in the day and start to eat more. Also a lot can change in a couple of weeks, she might just 'get' it. I have just returned to work and my husband has our 9 month old. She does eat quite well but loves breastfeeding so I was worried how she would cope, but she has been fine.

Obviously you are both anxious. Is there any way of having a back up plan e.g. doing some half days or you visiting at lunch time, to reassure you both? If not, I would just be prepared for a couple of grouchy days, maybe with lots planned to distract her, whilst she figures it out.

We have recently given her baby biscuits which she really enjoys munching on but she quickly worked out she could use her lip to remove the crumbs from her tongue!

Thanks to everyone I feel a little more reassured that things will work. She is getting the hang of a cup with water now - she couldn't work bottles out and just tried to bite them. Hopefully it will just be a few grouchy days at worst. There is no backup so I guess we have no choice but to work it out.

Maybe even the various family dinners over Christmas will help her. Plenty of children about for her to copy.

My DS is slightly younger than your DD (8l and was a spoon refuser, only wanted to feed himself, so some going in but still drinking a lot of milk. He improved massively seemingly overnight, taking a spoon and generally eating more and dropped a milk feed. So it may just happen! There appeared to be no reason for it, other than I'd been trying for weeks and weeks to get him to take a spoon and first day back at work my DH managed it! Awkward baby maybe?!

Woops, that was supposed to say 8 months!

My ds is almost identical except he's just turned one and I've decided to go hardcore and use refusal by distraction when he wants to bf during the day. He's helped himself to a little bit of mashed fruit today and had a small glass of water. No advice other than to keep trying and keep your chin up. It will work out one way or another.

I had been rather optimistic but we are in the second week now and she is still not really eating. My wife breast feeds her just before her bed time, when we go to bed, and then in the morning. So she is missing out on her previous two daytime feeds.

She basically refuses to eat anything in the morning and may have a couple of sips of water. In the afternoon she has a few bites and a few more sips and just becomes more agitated as the day goes on. She is hardly wetting her nappy in the afternoon.

She does know how to eat the food but she mainly likes to spit it out. The same for her daytime milk, she takes in from her cup and slowly spits it out. Any attempt with a spoon from me is met with clamped lip and shaking head.

I am starting to wonder if we are going to need to stop all breast feeding to get her to eat or whether she will actually work it out at some point soon!

I don't really have much experience of this exactly but I still feed my 10 month DD twice a day and she will still eat during the day. I don't think stopping feeding would help particularly as it doesn't sound like she is getting too much milk.

My DD is better at eating generally but does have periods of time when she has very little. Are mealtimes fun or stressful? Sometimes they pick up on your moods. We found that completely ignoring her really works. Lots of options in front of her and not bothering whether she eats. She is no longer a fan of spoon feeding - she wants complete control over what goes in her mouth.

Easier said than done though. It's tough when they don't eat. Do you have any support from your local healthcare team (HV or GP?)

I try to keep mealtimes relaxed and leave her to do her own thing. If it is just me and her, I read the paper or something similar with the radio on. Within 5-10 mins she starts to throw food on the floor, smear it around like a wiper and then start shouting at me - I tend to stop then.

I shall keep persevering - just a little worried about whether she is getting all she needs. I shall see what her weight is like at her next weigh-in. She has been following the 95th percentile and so the HV hasn't been interested in her eating habits.

Sounds like you are doing a great job, keep relaxed, she will eat when she is hungry. I only started to replace milk with food when they turned 1, just let her play with textures as you have been doing. Teething had them refusing food in favour of milk too.....

Our DD was even more extreme - she wouldn't try to put food in her mouth, and would gag/spit out anything we got in, then vomit up her previous milk feed to get out anything that she couldn't spit out (a highlight was when she vomited to eject yoghurt...) She did at least take a bottle - if your DD will take water from a cup, will she take milk? That might keep her happier. My DD has slowly improved, but she still drinks a lot of milk, and will only eat about half the meals given to her at nursery, i.e. half the time she refuses to eat anything. (We deliberately chose a nursery where all the children are given the same food so she'd see other children eat. It's helped a bit, but by no means solved the problem.) We collect her at 1pm, so she doesn't go all day without.

What helped me was deciding to be less stressed about it, and knowing that she was drinking milk - she's always been a healthy weight.

Hope your DD is keener on food soon.

She is getting hungrier, thirstier and more and more upset. Our happy smiling baby has gone to a sad, whiny, upset baby. She spent the whole day on and off crying. I tried multiple meals and snacks which she hardly touched. She maybe had 10 sips of water/milk. Tried various cups, even tried a bottle again and no interest at all. She just pushes them away and shakes her head. I tried different types of milks and even at different temperatures.

I could try talking to the HV again but they have been little help so far. I am not sure if they fully understood that she won't take a bottle (or cup) either, so she gets hardly any milk/water or food now in the day.

I literally have no idea what to do but she can't carry on crying all day everyday. I just hopes she figures it out.

Just a thought - could you try syringe feeding her? We had to do that with DD when she was very small as she couldn't latch. It transformed a miserable baby into one that at least slept (she was very young at this point). It's not much fun, but it would make your DD happier. We had a 50ml syringe - though your DD may refuse.

You need to talk to your GP.
She is starving herself rather than eat. This suggests there is another problem. Is she is pain ?silent reflux
Clearly HV unhelpful. This needs a medical (?general paed) opinion x

Just wanted to show some solidarity, mine is now 13 months and has been found to have an iron deficiency so we have to try and get a liquid supplement in him somehow, which is additional fun..

I know what you mean about HV's, we had a nursery nurse come out to try to help from the HV team, all she could suggest was have you tried weetabix or porridge?! I mean come on, I've just said he doesn't put anything in his mouth which could be food and you think trying weetabix will resolve this? Missing the point there somewhat.

The GP said he's not worried because he is a good weight, he worries about the ones who are losing weight yet the parents say they eat plenty...

I'm sorry your dd is upset because of it. I really wish I could be more help. Is she in nursery now or are you at home with her during the day?

She is at home with me in the day.

She is quite volatile with medicines. For both Rotavirus doses she projectile vomitted over me. She also threw up attempts at vitamins until we found she does at least take the Abidec multi-vitmain.

Interestingly the NHS website on reflux does suggest persistent hiccups could be a sign of reflux. She does get hiccups a lot.

It does help to know there are other troublesome eaters out there. I might get her weighed this week and maybe see the GP based on that and how she is doing generally.

If you can persuade her to take milk, toddler formula contains the vitamins she needs - you then don't need to get a multi vitamin into her (that wasn't any fun for us either).