still not eating.

[sjwinter2013]

Hello, I have a 13 month old boy who just doesn't eat, he is underweight and does see a Dietrician and his health visitor but they don't seem to be doing anything other than speak to my like a child as if I'm doing something wrong, They check his weight and check his height and ask me what I'm trying to do to get him to eat but I have tried everything, they haven't suggested anything at all. I am hoping that maybe someone on here has gone through what I am now and may have an insight or a suggestion that will help. Thank you.

Could you give us a bit more info? Does he eat anything at all? Does he enjoy milk? Could you give him more high fat food? Use cream and cheese a lot, and full fat everything. And offer snacks in case he'll take a few mouthfuls.

Are his mealtimes peaceful? Could anything be putting him off eating? My friend's DS ate much better at nursery , or at my house than at home, until his mum started eating with him. He liked the company. He would also eat if watching the telly, though I think that was when he was older than 13 months, and I know my friend did do this if he hadn't eaten all day.

Is he very active? It was hard to keep my DS's weight increasing , his appetite was fine but he always wanted to go and play so it was difficult to get him to eat enough to keep him going.

I know there are some good books on getting kids to eat but possibly some more knowledgeable mumsnetters terms than me can remember their titles...

Does he have reflux or tongue tie?

He has his milk (infitrini) which is prescribed for him, it's a high calorie milk.

Basically what I try and give him during a day is....

Morning I try him with porridge in the kitchen (which he screams at he hates the spoon going near him unless he is holding it, so I started putting the bowl on a nonstick mat and giving him the spoon to see how it went, nothing went in his mouth and if it did he spat it back out) I alternate between that, crumpets, toast, sometimes even sausages and bacon and eggs. He chews it and spits it back out or just chucks it on the floor... Sometimes he will eat a little bit but not much.

Lunch I do a platter of finger foods and I sit with him in the living room with baby tv on in the background. The platter usually has sandwiches with two different meats on or soft cheese or normal cheese, cut up fruit and veg like apples, grapes, tomatoes, peppers (sweet) and the kids junk free crisps and kids biscuits. I sit there with him and eat my bit off the same plate so that he can see what I'm doing and that it's not going to poison him! Again he will eat a bit but flies mainly chewing it up then pushing it back out of him mouth and on to the carpet then he rubs it into my carpet. My hv has told me to tell him off when he does this and praise him when he eats something which I do but doesn't seem to be improving the eating, he's just become less messy.

Tea time he has what ever I am having and I sit with him (him being in his high chair) and give him it. I have tried feeding but he will scream the place down and clamp his mouth shut.

I give him is bottles after I have tried to give him food and the lunch one is usually there for a good hour and half to two hours before I even attempt to tidy it away just to give him the chance.

He is very active, I think he is over active especially when even with the milk alone he should be putting on more weight then he actually is. Regarding the peace, there is only me and him and when he is eating (well ment to be eating) it's either silence, quiet music paying on my phone or baby tv on.

I hope I have answered all your question :D

Thankbyou

Hello iggly, he did have reflux but my hv or doctors didn't do anything or listen to me until December (when he was 7 months) when my hv decided to send him to Dietrician because he had dropped three lines on his graph.... If I'm honest I don't know what tongue tie is and wouldn't know what to look for but my hv or Dietrician haven't mentioned anything about this or checked.

My DS is 12 months and v independent when it comes to feeding. He won't let me feed him most of the time but what can sometimes help is that I give him a spoon or fork and then I have a spoon and I can feed him this way.

Personally I would have the TV off when it's time to eat and maybe just have a radio on.

Try not to worry too much. He will start to eat more and their tummies really are still quite small at this age.

What about things like homemade spaghetti Bol? I always find that a winner with the kids.

Oh and I just re read your post. I would clear away good after 30 minutes or so. In my experience they don't have the patience to sit there for an hour or so.

Does your DS snack a lot?

Well it sounds like you are doing all the things I can think of! Lots of variety being offered, and company, and a bit of distraction with music and the telly. The book I was thinking of is My Child Won't Eat by Carlos Gonzales, your local l ibrary might have a copy. Have the pros checked for things like tongue tie? It must be very worrying.

I find he has a little more with baby tv on. I think I'm more concerned because when he gets to 18 month this milk stops and at the moment that's all he is really having.
If I do manage to get anything in his mouth he spits it back out I've tried finger food, jars, homemade blended, unblended food.

At the moment he is still in 3-6 month clothes, I can get him in 6-9 months but they are big on him, especially the bottoms.

Preggersbycheggers I used to do just 30 minutes but one day I had to make a phone call (i was still sat in the room ) and I found that he would go and play then go back and eat a little bit more so I tend to just make stuff that woun't spoilt quickly and let him go back and fourth.

I've just realised I missed the 18 month bit out of my last message. When he gets to 18 month they woun't prescribe this milk for him anymore.

Milkrunningoutagain I might have a look for that book even if it just gets another grape down him or something it will be helpful. In all honesty they only check his height and weight they haven't actually examined him at all.

How much milk is he getting? My baby ate nothing until I cut his milk back a lot. It took a few days but eventually he did accept some food. He was probably starving by that point. He still has very little though!

Yes lots of people I know rave about that book. I think you are doing a fab job and tbh you have to do what works right now then go about changing and tweaking things later.

Just keep offering lots of food and I'm sure there will be a breakthrough at some point. DS1 was v slow to eat but DS2 started to eat much quicker.

Oh just another too, have you tried having a little friend of his over for lunch? That could help too.

Keep going and keep pestering the HV for advice if you feel you need it.

When I say lots of food I mean variety. Sometimes a large plate of food can overwhelm a little one.

He has four bottles a day (7oz) but that's because that's what his Dietrician has told me to give him that many. I have tried to cut him down to three but he just screamed until he got the fourth bottle. I always give him his food first no matter what but it doesn't seem to be helping much.

Four bottles is quite a lot, mine didn't eat until we went down to 3! I don't want to tell you to go against your dietician's advice or starve him but he might not be very hungry on that volume.

I tried the baby play date and food which helped alot, he ate loads well for him anyway I have arranged for some more at least once a week. So I am hoping that will kick start him eating properly when it's just me and him.

I tend to just give a little bowl full and give him it bit by bit because he tend to throw it on the floor. The only time I put a big plate out is when I'm eating finger food with him so what's on the plate is for me and him. Hoping this would encourage him more and it also means that I can get something to eat too.

Does anyone know what I'm looking for regarding tongue tie?

Have you tried a picnic or (you might need to be brave) eating out somewhere? The novelty of a completely new situation might stun him into eating. Also you could try just not taking any notice of him. Have a friend round for lunch and the three of you (you, friend, son) sit at the table with the same meal in front of you all, you and friend just chat and leave him to it. These are things that have helped my fussy DS when he was younger and very uninterested in eating. Going out somewhere we would find that he tried our food, which he never would at home.