Aaaagh what do I do now? (lighthearted)

[KikiShack]

DD is 23 weeks, but was 2 weeks overdue, so 25 weeks by due date, ie nearly 6 months. She can sit up unaided (for 20 seconds, then she wobbles and falls over).
She has been frantically trying to grab my food off my plate for a few weeks now, and stares and smiles whenever I eat, so I decided to wean her yesterday.

For breakfast I made some porridge with breastmilk and dp offered her spoonfuls, just touching it to her lips but letting her guide it in. She spit it straight out and looked disgusted. We then gave her some batons of banana, she didn't even try then in her mouth, just got upset about the whole thing.

Today I gave her batons of melon, she sucked for a bit but it was slippery and kept shooting out her hand. I think tried a little bit of cooked potato and poached fish, just chunks for her to grab. She grabbed and squashed but nothing really went in the mouth, well some did but it came straight out again! We mashed some pots/fish with a little semi skim milk but she cried at the sight of it when I offered a spoon. (is semi milk ok here if there isn't any whole milk? as its early days surely it won't harm her?!).
Then this afternoon she grabbed at my cream tea so I gave her some clotted cream on my finger. She wanted it in her mouth then it just stayed there, then slid out. She didn't seem to understand swallowing food! Oh and she has water but doesnt drink much, she is very unsure about the sippy cup, and was a bottle/dummy refuser. She only likes my boob or anyone's finger in her mouth.

Tomorrow I have some leftover roast for her- some boiled carrot, roast parsnip, a bit of steamed broccoli and a small baton of roast lamb.

She's not eating any of it, help!!! Joking aside does this sound about right for the first couple of days of BLW, or am I doing it all wrong? TIA.

It all sounds completely normal. It takes time to learn a new skill. Try to be patient and baby led! That's the point of BLW, give her time and don't worry. BLW is a slow start but stick with it as they suddenly just "get it"

Keep offering bits of your meals/food when you are eating and watch her learn, there is no rush, remember "good is fun until they're one"

"Food is fun..." That should have said

Totally normal and don't rush it.

She's just over 5 months, why not wait til 6?

Sounds normal to me, and she may not seem to eat anything for a few months, then one day you will realise she is eating. All fine.

Bonadea I was hoping that you'd be convinced by using due date as she's only a week shy of 6 months using that, and she's a massive beast of a girl at 24lbs, so is clearly developmentally doing well.
The reason why not to wait (for us) are twofold- first she has been very successful grabbing my food for a couple of weeks and had almost eaten all sorts of things and I wanted to feel a bit more control in giving it to her rather than finding she,has shoved a lump of melted pizza cheese in her mouth as her first food. And second DP and I are visiting on laws so we are relaxed and being looked after for 3 days, so it seemed a good relaxing opportunity to start rather than squeezing it in between washing and hoovering and dishwasher etc at home, especially as I wanted DP to start it off since I've been in charge of all boob feeds up till now.
Because we are a touch early I'm even happier to take it slowly, just wanted to check we're on the right track.

And thanks Dave and Milk. I'm trying to be patient! it's hard though, why can't she just swallow? I do it all the time, it's very easy

Like any new skill, eating requires some practice! She's working out how to hold the food, manoeuvre it to her mouth, chew etc. And despite giving the impression that she wants food, she may just be curious about what it is rather than actually being hungry. At this stage, I just viewed mealtimes as playtime and if any food got eaten, that was a definite bonus!

It's not due date, it's actual age that "counts" for weaning purposes (because their experiences of processing milk stem from post-birth so their digestive system develops at actual age,IYSWIM)

However, that's more or less irrelevant in your circumstances, I think. I'd try fewer different things (bit confusing to a developing palate?) and make it completely low key - if he's grabbing food off your plate let him! Don't worry about having to use a spoon etc

Ahh thanks Families, that makes sense new you spell it out. And Cornish I think definitely curious rather than hungry. She's so keen to know what absolutely everything looks and tastes like. OK I'll stick to one flavour per meal and after a couple of gag-vomit incidents today might go for letting her lick puree off a spoon rather than chew on batons.
I think I was a bit too excited about BLW as I was viewing her as 6 months, but it seems that was a mistake so I'll calm things down a notch or two.
Thanks for answers x

The advice about waiting to 6 months is very clear.

Leaving that to one side, you do just have to be patient. It takes months and months if you are doing blw. Don't get frustrated now or you'll be tearing your hair out in a few weeks!

to answer your milk in food question, you really should hold off til 6 months for dairy because before then the gut isn't mature enough and you're running the risk of triggering allergies. express a little bm to mix with mash instead for now. And yes, it really should be full fat.
As to the rest, it really doesn't matter that she's not really eating at this stage, she'll still be getting her nutrients from her milk. I weaned dd at a similar age, tried to hold her off til 6 months but in.the end was more than ready.

Rowboat thanks for your advice about milk. I will leave that out for another month. tbh I think that was pressure from the in laws and I couldn't be bothered arguing again, but I will stand firm (plus not seeing them again for well over a month ). thankfully DD didn't eat any of the mash.
Are butter and full fat yogurt ok from a cow milk protein pov?
And bonadea thanks for the condescending line, I'm not sure the nhs does make clear that 6 months is based on milk induced gut processing maturity, it just talks about gut maturity so I thought my due date assumption was a reasonable one. Given DD is 5 1/2 months old, 24lbs, can sit unaided, can grab, guide to mouth and swallow puree, and is interested in food I think there's a pretty good case for her being ready to wean. In my sleep deprived mind I got a bit muddled and went too far blw for 2 days but have clearly been taking on advice from the board, plus I have HV and GPs blessing to start this weekend just gone (some weight monitoring as she's so huge so lots of conversations with medical pros about food).
I respect the NHS advice and use it as a starting point but am happy to use my own common sense to deviate a bit, eg I had the odd glass of wine while pregnant which is against advice but clearly fine. I also weighed up the risks and ate soft cheeses and bagged salad. Do you rigidly stick to the government's advice on every single thing you do?

Well my baby is 24 weeks and have given her a few bit of food but was planning in waiting till she is 6 months to start properly. Took her to get weighed today and health visitor said I should have started weaning her already.

Just to add to other posters, I totally got my knickers in a twist with BLW, then at 8mo DS finally seemed to get the point. Don't be surprised if you get four days of eating, ten days of nothing, three days of eating, a week of nothing etc.

Thanks essex and draw. The advice is conflicting isn't it?! I don't generally trust HVs (2 of my mum group friends got told to wean their big babies at 15 and 16 weeks, clearly crazy) but I do trust my GP.
I'm trying to not get overexcited and impatient with it, hence the lighthearted bit in my title, I did find it amusing that after one day I was wondering if I'm doing it right!! Some good advice on here about how to nudge it into a better direction though so I'm glad I posted, even though it was semi in jest.

I'm pretty sure it's all dairy so no butter or yogurt til 6 months either. Really best to stick to simple fruit and veg at this stage.

www.readysteadybaby.org.uk/growing-together/looking-after-your-growing-baby/weaning-your-baby/index.aspx
sorry on app so link is crap, but there's a table towards the bottom of this page which is pretty clear about what's ok before 6 months and what you need to avoid.