HV Has left me totally confused about feeding, can someone help?

[VIX1980]

Ds is 9 months, in thats time ive seen the health visitor once when he was 1 month old and never heard from her again until i had another 1 ring to make an appt last wk. She came yesterdasy, ds is doing perfectly well but she contradicted everything id been doing with regards to weaning and said it was basicaly wrong.

As i was left to my own devices i just did what my cousin had did and followed annabel karmels book of purees, mashed and finger food, ao at this point, i do still cook his meals, mash them slightly so theyre all lumpy and he eats fine, he has had finger foods but only things such as toast for breakfast, the heinz biscuits and fruit pieces. Was told bascially yesterday that i should of gone through the purees and mashing, should of just given him veg, which i did along with the mashing stage (sorry if this is not making any sense).

What i really need to know is what the hell should i be feeding him, or should he be feeding himself, i will make things like chicken pasta, chilli, casseroles and just mash him a bit up, but should he just be having finger foods by now, she didnt really answer my questions at all and im more confused than before, although i do know a lot about her sil whome she never stopped talking about Grateful for anything as i need to go shopping to get him more bits in to eat, just dont know what??

Just feed him normal food. Leave out sugar, salt, honey & things like shark. Doesn't matter if its mashed or puréed or finger food - however he likes it. If you check the 'Birth to 5' NHS book, or on line version, it makes weaning sound very simple - just give normal food & mash it etc if you need to.

I don't see what you are doing wrong actually.

Also, how old are you? I'm asking because I know the HVs in my area like to bully mums in their 20s. They don't dare to boss us older mums around.

There's nothing wrong with following Annabel Karmel. Many many people do. You are cooking your own food for your LO. I think you are doing very well. He's eating lumpy food and also feeding himself.

thanks for the messages, actually thought i was doing ok cooking everythig myself, the 1st Hv i had was all for the puree stage but this 1 yesterday was saying i shouldnt of done it, then went on to say if i have chips give him chips, if i have chocolate give him chocolate so on reflection maybe her advice wasnt the best to listen to, she just left me really confused as to what he should be eating and how he should be eating it.

Im actually 32, ive heard of them bullying younger mums, never thought what i was doing was somehow wrong though until she came. Im going to have a look at that book today and just go by that i think. thanks again!

I think these are the pages Stubbed referred to

www.nhs.uk/Conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/Pages/solid-foods-weaning.aspx#close

www.nhs.uk/start4life/Pages/babies-food-variety.aspx

You can see it's just very very general guidelines on what the baby can't eat.

Doing purees is fine. Many people choose not to but if it works for you then that is totally ok. Your HV has obviously heard that the NHS is now in favour of baby led weaning (baby has what you have) but of course baby led weaning doesn't mean pass your baby some of any old unhealthy crap and advising you to feed him chips and chocolates is nonsense.
At 9 months I would say you ought to be introducing finger foods. It doesn't mean you have to stop purees yet, you can do some of each. Some meals work well as finger food (sunday lunch for example - roast potato can be cut into wedges, carrot sticks easy to pick up, broccoli easy to pick up, bits of meat etc). Some meals are less easy to feed as finger food (anything with rice)

I would say you sound like you have a healthy home cooked diet from what you say you are cooking, so carry on with that. But start letting him try feeding himself some bits. If you are having pasta, fusilli is a good shape for babies. if you are having a casserole, you may want to carry on spoon feeding. Snacks are a great time to introduce finger food - sticks of fruit for example.

You're doing really well, HV can be a complete pain! Keep going and introduce any finger foods that you have at home (bread, veggies, rice cakes etc). x

You sound to me like you are doing exactly the right thing - KatandKit's advice re finger foods is good too. Unfortuantely health visitor can be very out of date with their advice or base it on their own experience and views rather than on the current evidence available.
Out of interest, can I ask if you felt that you could easily get enough info about weaning or would you have found something like an app useful? Without wishing to out myself, I work in this area (in the public sector, not a commercial company I hasten to add) and it's something I'm thinking about doing. (apologies for the slight thread hijack!)

Tbh I avoid hv as advice has been either wrong, poor, or on occaision dangerous!

I come here. Glad to see others have been helpful. Ur description sounded great to me. :)

Likes: an app generally might be useful. Brain goes blank when faced with a baby/toddler......

I think what you're doing sounds fine. I've done a mix of finger foods and mash/purees. Now LO is 11 months, so he rarely gets mashed food now, just has what we have (minus salt and sugar).

He loves pasta in either creamy sauces or tomato sauces, with mushrooms and shredded turkey/chicken/tuna etc.

Honesty please don't worry about it. It will all work itself out whatever way you do it. You won't be packing your lo off to university with jars of puree :)

I am a traditional weaner :) dd now aged 10 and ds 10 months have been puree fed, then gradually got larger lumps and around about 8 months I start breaking tiny bits of my food off for them and let them grab it. I don't do the whole finger food thing as such as dd had a nasty near choking accident with a potato my mum gave her so I admit I am overly cautious and only offer bite sized pieces until they are able to talk basically!

Both of them love all their food and eat anything and everything. Ds is still also on 4 bottles of 8oz a day. I just let them lead me.

Don't let your health visitor bully you. If your lo is healthy and developing well it really doesn't matter how they eat as long as they do.

I think it sounds like you are doing absolutely fine. Your baby is getting a mix of finger food and purées and seems happy with it. What's not to like about that? And if you are making his food yourself, you are doing brilliantly - this is a lovely thing to do for your baby. Home cooked food, baby happy, it all sounds great.

I wouldn't give a baby of that age chocolate but chips are actually not a bad finger food for smalls as they do need more fat than adults and a chunky chip is a good shape for them to grab easily and eat. But there's no requirement to feed your baby chips and I expect he's having butter on toast and fat in other things such as milk and cheese and whatever so don't stress about it. Your HV has done what many of them seem to and latched on to one tiny bit of the guidelines without looking at what's really going on with him!

If your son is eating a varied diet with plenty of fruit and veg it really doesn't matter that much at this stage how it is actually presented, IMO. I think the variety of tastes and textures is the important part and you seem to be doing great with that.