A window of what?!? And other weird things HVs say

[CommanderShepard]

"There's a window of opportunity for introducing solids - you're pushing it by not having started yet [at 5 mos]"
"That's not what this handy NHS pamphlet says..."
"Yes, well I've been a Health Visitor for umpteen years I told Mary that Jesus needed baby riceand your daughter will be breastfed at 40 if you don't start her on some purée soon"

What gems has your HV come out with?

(The breastfed bit is an exaggeration; the window isn't)

Think you seriously need to write and suggest she has her training updated. The window thing is utter bollocks, I didn't have an avocado until I was 24 and I love them, don't think I missed my avocado window but perhaps that's a different window

When mine were younger and my HV was coming out with such gems, I would just smile and say oh that's really interesting, I'd love to read more, have you got the research paper on that please?

I have complained when the advice was incorrect too.

'A seven month old baby only needs two milk feeds a day and should be getting most of his nutrition from solids. Withhold breastfeeds so that he's hungry and only give him solids as the option. If you give in, it will be baby 1, mum nil!'

'He'll start sleeping through the night when he consistently has three meals a day as well.'

Jilted oh I did!

I was bewildered, exhausted and borderline insane for the first couple of weeks after childbirth, but even then I could see that some visiting midwives/HVs were bonkers. They couldn't agree on how long a BF should last. One told me that if dd was still going after 40 mins, she was "at it." I'm sure another one told me to wake a sleeping baby to feed her. Even my husband knew that was weird. But some of them were lovely, especially Joyce who showed me how to do the rugby ball!

"Long term breastfeeding does tend to lead to sleep problems."
(By long term I think she meant six months)

When asked if I'd started weaning DS yet (at 24 weeks) and I told her that he had taken toast of me that morning I was told

'Silly girl ( I was 29) you should give him bland food like baby rice!!!'
I told her I didn't think wallpaper paste was appropriate to feed to my baby and would be doing BLW, too which she shock her head and muttered something about newfangled nonsense

Was told that at 9 months old, my breastmilk is "just a drink" for my DD and she should be eating loads by now. She said it in the manner that it was like water or juice. There was a trainee HV there too. I just smiled and nodded, but later I felt terrible that I didn't correct her or challenge her, especially as the trainee HV was there. I'm not good at debate though.

I wonder how many toddlers have 3 square meals and still aren't good sleepers . But I guess we've stopped seeing those HV by then! Mine eats more weetabix than me in the morning and still wakes at night.

Funny you should say that OneLittleToddlingTerror. I recently spoke to a HV about my toddler's eating habits, and how his diet is a bit limited (although I believe he is covering all the food groups - but this was actually what I would have liked to check). Apparently the reason he isn't eating better is because I let him eat too many weetabix, and if I limit him to two, or even one at breakfast, then he will suddenly start to eat more vegetables...

" by four months she shouldn't need to feed more often than every 4 hours in the day. Don't let her snack or she'll do it all night as well"

Also at four months " if she keeps waking up just give her a dummy or get your husband to go to her, she doesn't need feeding more than once in the night, you've let her get into a habit"
Me...but she cries unless I feed her, I think she's hungry.
HV " no it's just habit if you fed her more in the day she would t need it over night, let her cry a bit and then she'll sleep"
Me...but you told me not to let her snack in the day??!!

Yes obviously I ignored all advice and feed her whenever she wants poor munchkin!

HV advised me to "let DD sleep at someone else's house overnight then she'll have to take a bottle when she's starving"

DD is 20 weeks and EBF, she refuses a bottle of expressed breast milk or formula, but I'm still never going to take HV's advice, I'd rather be up all night feeding her myself than let poor baby starve!