Regaining confidence after a nasty accident

[SkipperBlueEyes]

In January, my horse fell on top of me and then rolled across me, it was a total accident he really is genuine and lovely: I broke the ball socket going into my shoulder, it was smashed literally to pieces and has needed 3 operations I broke my hip socket, 3 vertabrae, 6 ribs and punctured my lung. It was horrific, it took 2 hours for ambulance to arrive who promptly called the air ambulance I was in hospital for a month and have been in horrific pain since.

I've just started riding again and I'm pretty sure I still want to but am equally so nervous I rode yesterday and actually once I got on I was ok, my back was a bit achey but otherwise it was comfy enough. I just wanted some tips really for conquering the fear, I'm so gutted as we had been doing so well xc and sj but now I don't think I'll ever be gutsy enough to be more than a happy hacker which is better than nothing but I'd love the confidence to be able to jump again one day.

Hypnotherapy worked for me when I broke my wrist being bucked off. The hypnotherapist used classic PTSD techniques and taught me how to use them myself.

She also said to view the accident as a bit like some sort of barrier, ditch, fence, curtain whatever works in your imagination. The time before the accident is on one side, the time after the accident is on the other. Everything that you knew, all the skills and experience you had on the pre accident side of the ditch are still with you on the other side. You don't wipe those out or lose them, which is what we tend to think. The accident is a moment in time, it doesn't have to change anything if you don't want it to.

It's hard to explain, but it worked for me. After weeks off with the injury, I spent weeks as a gibbering nauseous wreck every time I got back on. I knew I couldn't carry on and I was desperate. I took the view that I would go into it with an open mind, because the worst thing that could happen was that I would waste £50 and be no better after.

What have you got to lose?

Skipper, that sounds awful. And (in a hopefully non-patronising way) I think you're very brave to get back on.

Could you have lessons on a mechanical horse? Sounds weird I know but would help iron out issues with balance and any worries about exacerbating the injuries before you put the actual animal back in the picture. Also maybe find an instructor who knows enough sports coaching techniques to help you regain confidence.

I broke my ribs the first time I got on BonkeyTB - literally swung my leg over and that was as far as I got and then in a&e

I hadn't ridden for 6 years beforehand bar a few rounds on ponies.

I built up to it slowly and once I was on board properly I just kept going despite what my head was saying.

The more you do the more you will relax - even if you just get on and walk round a school for 5 mins - you did it! Make sure someone is with you if it makes you feel more confident.
I had to have a friend say shout at me 'Get the fuck on your horse woman!!!' for the first time after the incident. I needed it although i accept it may not be for everyone

My issue is more mounting because thats where our explosion started - I finally got on the other day after 6 months and didn't think twice. didn't realize until halfway through my ride that I had got on and not dithered!

Good luck!
I hope it gets easier for you soon !