Teachers: should I send this email or not?

[AngieBolen]

I will go with the majority vote.

My Y8 DD has recently adopted a certain way of phrasing things which cubes across as down right rude. She really doesn't mean to be rude, but that's how she comes across. DH and I pull her up in it, to no avail.

She told be last night about a question she asked in a lesson; the way she asked did sound rude and the teacher pulled her up on it. DD replied "OK, sorry"

Now I know DD meant it in a dirty way, but that's not at all how it sounded, and again the teacher pulled her up on it.

Would it be weird to email the teacher to thank her for addressing DDs rudeness? I am genuinely grateful but maybe the teacher has already forgotten about it.

I would think it was weird to make a big lettery deal out of something the teacher will say probably most days to some pupils.

If it were me I’d be wondering where she is copying the rude turns of phrase from and try and stop that.

Always nice to get a thankyou but I'm not sure i fully understand what your daughter said. Did your autocorrect go a bit wobbly in some places?

I’m probably not going to be the popular opinion but sounds like your daughter is just pushing boundaries, year 8 is always a funny year because they aren’t the youngest anymore and think they are all grown up. Teenagers are full are attitude and sometimes you just gotta let them ride it out.
I think she would be absolutely mortified if she finds out you thanked her teacher. Just let it go xx

Meant to say *full of attitude xx

I think an email is possibly making a mountain out of a molehill. Unless you haven't told us something about her regarding a SEN etc then she should be old enough for you to explain she has to be careful how she speaks to people and speaking to teachers the same way she speaks to friends etc might not be acceptable. If she has o lyrics just started doing it she obviously knows the right way and she just needs to remember who she is talking to.

if she has only

A thank you is always appreciated. Even if it wasn't a big deal to the teacher at the time, it can't hurt to show that you're on the same side and are grateful for his/her efforts.

So I many typos!

Its not the turn of phrase she's using, it's more the accent...she speaks like Queen Victoria. If I typed what she said it would seem perfectly polite.

The question she asked was: "What will people be doing on this trip?"

I'm cringing just typing it. DD was genuinely interested in what people would be doing on the trip. DD isn't going on the trip. The teacher told her she was being disparaging to those who were going on the trip.

It's not just the posh accent...she says it in a bored way, even though she's interested.

She's picking it up from ZdC at school - but the ones she's picking it up from will have the sense to use a slightly lighter kilt with teachers - I think that's what I mean. It's hard to describe,

Always nice to be thanked but I agree it sounds quite minor and the kind of thing we pull kids up on all the time so the teacher possibly won’t even remember doing it!

It's a fairly minor thing and I don't think it needs an email. However it's always nice to get a positive mail confirming that similar behaviour will be cracked down on at home. Go for it, I don't see the harm.

So is she doing that slightly affected way of speaking which rubs people up the wrong way because it's irritating and comes off as rude ?

I wouldn't send a massive email but a thank you is always appreciated (especially because we get a few who are endlessly whining when we tell their previous DC to behave).

I'm always really really happy to receive any email from a parent thanking me for anything. It's incredibly rare but is truly lovely to feel that someone appreciates what you do- even though it is a really tiny minor thing that is just a typical part of their day.

I say go for it- you will probably make their day