Saying goodbye | Mumsnet

Pippinsdiary · 2025-06-04T08:43:26+00:00

My cat is being put to sleep today. My appointment is at 11 and I’m just sat here crying, feeling incredibly guilty that he will never go outside again or be snuggled up all safe at home. He’s just laid on the chair oblivious to what’s happening I don’t know what I want from this post but I thought I’d be stronger than this as he’s suffering and it’s his time :(

Tupperwarefan · 04/06/2025 10:10

Ah OP it’s the final act of love for your pet. It’s so hard…but one day you will look back with a smile not tears. X

Didntask · 04/06/2025 10:10

You're doing a kind thing. Big hugs 🫂

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 04/06/2025 10:17

So sorry, OP. They break your heart. Ours was racing around the garden before being hustled into the box and carted to the vet for the final time, and it felt both unimaginably cruel and completely surreal. But it would have been far more cruel to have her continue with a massive terminal cancer growing in her stomach, and I am so glad we let her go well, with dignity, surrounded by her people, and before she suffered too much. We took that pain so she didn’t have to.

Sending lots of love to you and your boy. 🤍

Original poster

Pippinsdiary · 04/06/2025 10:23

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 04/06/2025 10:17

So sorry, OP. They break your heart. Ours was racing around the garden before being hustled into the box and carted to the vet for the final time, and it felt both unimaginably cruel and completely surreal. But it would have been far more cruel to have her continue with a massive terminal cancer growing in her stomach, and I am so glad we let her go well, with dignity, surrounded by her people, and before she suffered too much. We took that pain so she didn’t have to.

Sending lots of love to you and your boy. 🤍

We took that pain so she didn’t have to

This is such a lovely way of putting it, thank you

OP posts:

Charlotteap · 04/06/2025 12:31

“I held you close, right to the end, because love means not letting you suffer. Even though my heart was breaking, I chose your peace over my pain. Letting you go wasn’t giving up on you, it was standing by you, one last time, with every ounce of love I had. You trusted me your whole life… and I couldn’t let you down when you needed me most.”

Bonbon249 · 04/06/2025 14:08

Big virtual hug to you. This is one of the hardest things to do as an adult. We love these little furry creatures and letting them go is so, so heartbreaking. Being there with him is the kindest thing you can do as they do look for their people if they are not there and this causes them distress.

Springtimehere · 04/06/2025 14:17

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Gingirl84 · 04/06/2025 14:28

Charlotteap · 04/06/2025 12:31

“I held you close, right to the end, because love means not letting you suffer. Even though my heart was breaking, I chose your peace over my pain. Letting you go wasn’t giving up on you, it was standing by you, one last time, with every ounce of love I had. You trusted me your whole life… and I couldn’t let you down when you needed me most.”

Oh man that’s got me crying

Passmethegin67 · 04/06/2025 14:34

Hope all went well OP. Take comfort in the fact that you acted in your cat’s best interest, the final act of love, and they are at peace free from pain.

NoEnemiesManyPatios · 04/06/2025 14:36

Our very own Queen once said "Grief is the price of Love", and I find that a comfort.

Imagine if you were the kind of person who wouldn't be upset by this? Doesn't bear thinking.

I also love that "took that pain" thought. 💔 I'm blubbing a little, actually.

HideousKinky · 04/06/2025 14:36

Pippinsdiary It is so hard but you are doing the right thing 💐

mummybear35 · 04/06/2025 14:42

He’s clearly been so loved and that’s more than some have had. It’s our last act of love to stop their suffering, if only we could have that courtesy for our human loved ones. I’ve lost count of how many cats, dogs, rabbits, hamsters, chickens etc that we’ve had to have put to sleep in over 50years. It doesn’t get easier but you know deep down, you’re going the right thing so sit with the grief and when you’re ready, get up, wash your face and move forward..sadly, life goes on (I say this as a widow 😔)

Private1980 · 04/06/2025 14:48

Absolutely heartbreaking we had to have ours put to sleep 8 weeks ago now because a taxi driver ran over her 😢 I read this post and literally started crying 😢 I'm so sorry xx

Tortielady · 04/06/2025 14:58

I am so sorry for your loss. Your little man had a great life with you and he knew how much he was loved. As a pp says, it's more than some (including many humans) get. You have nothing to feel guilty about; cats can be very intelligent and engaged, but they live in the moment. They don't know they are going to die and as your cat was ill, he'd probably seen his share of needles and thought this one was more of the same. And for him, it was. Go well, little one 🌻

ThatLemonBear · 04/06/2025 15:47

I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope you are ok

CatChant · 04/06/2025 15:53

I am so sorry. Freeing him from pain was the last gift you could give him. It doesn’t make it any less heartbreaking.

Be kind to yourself. It is so very hard to say goodbye.

Original poster

Pippinsdiary · 04/06/2025 19:54

Thanks so much everyone. I feel so sad tonight but relieved for Herbert knowing he’s not in pain ❤️ the vet did me his paw prints and saved some hair which I’m so grateful for.

Herbert was a stray who we adopted 9 years ago. He’s been through a lot and was diagnosed with feline aids so he’s done so well to last this long. He was the most loving boy, I’ll miss him so much

OP posts:

Original poster

Pippinsdiary · 04/06/2025 19:55

Private1980 · 04/06/2025 14:48

Absolutely heartbreaking we had to have ours put to sleep 8 weeks ago now because a taxi driver ran over her 😢 I read this post and literally started crying 😢 I'm so sorry xx

I’m so sorry, how traumatic for you x

OP posts:

Tortielady · 04/06/2025 20:11

Pippinsdiary · 04/06/2025 19:54

Thanks so much everyone. I feel so sad tonight but relieved for Herbert knowing he’s not in pain ❤️ the vet did me his paw prints and saved some hair which I’m so grateful for.

Herbert was a stray who we adopted 9 years ago. He’s been through a lot and was diagnosed with feline aids so he’s done so well to last this long. He was the most loving boy, I’ll miss him so much

You both did well - it takes a lot of TLC to get a cat to a reasonable age under those circumstances. We took in a little stray once. The vet thought she was about 5 and as time went on, all sorts of things started to emerge - gynae problems, (an operation sorted that out) then a chronic bacterial infection, then hyperthyroidism emerged and her kidneys started to fail. She was 12/13 when we decided and the vet agreed that enough was enough. She'd had 7 years of being loved and spoiled, but she needed people who cared about her to have all that. So did Herbert - the nine years you gave him meant more than he could ever tell you.

Igmum · 04/06/2025 20:14

So sorry @PippinsdiaryI’ve been through it and know how dreadful it is. Sending love to you, sounds as though Herbert was very loved ❤️

sassyclassyandsmartassy · 04/06/2025 20:57

I just wanted to come and give you love and hugs. I have always let mine go with dignity when the time comes, but it never makes it any easier. I truly feel for you. Hold him tight until the end and know that you always did your very best for him and he wouldn’t have had the life he did if you hadn’t met one another. Take comfort in all the years of love you have given one another 💕. They are never ‘just a pet’ xx

feckingmarvellous · 04/06/2025 20:58

Dear Pippinsdiary

I'm so sorry - we had to put our beautiful boy down yesterday and it is absolutely heartbreaking.

I just wanted to let you know that the Blue Cross offer this free service (hope the link works): https://www.bluecross.org.uk/pet-loss-support

Sending you much love x

Pudmyboy · 04/06/2025 21:06

So very sorry for your loss, it is the kindest yet hardest gift to give. I love the thought of 'taking the pain so they don't have to'. Be kind to yourself, and if you want to talk more about Herbert and share your favourite pictures, we would love to see them 💐

Mothership4two · 05/06/2025 03:03

The worst part of having a pet is their relatively short lives. It helps me to remember that they we gave them lovely lives and that they are no longer suffering. I hope there is a pet friendly Heaven and they are all there waiting for us.

for your loss

LetsGoFlyAKiteee · 05/06/2025 11:47

Sending you lots and lots of love. When my boy was put to sleep the night before he'd been just wandering around the house not settling then a few hours before was due to go came and sat on me and slept. Felt so bad having to the wake and move him.

Its a kindness but so so hard. Hugs to you