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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

Love me love my cat

14 replies

missingyears · 22/09/2023 02:06

I was trying to find a thread on another part of Mumsnet about what would instantly put you off someone. Couldn't find it! So I wanted to share:

I'm single. I was dating a guy who I liked very very much. I told him that I have a cat. He said the following:

"Oh my god i hate cats. My mum has got a cat and she is obsessed with it and my mums cat hates me!"

Uhhh, instant end of our dating, end of, over.....although I think his mum sounds great!

OP posts:
Original poster
missingyears · 22/09/2023 02:14

This guy was very attractive in many ways and I felt very dreamy about him. But when he said he actually'hates' cats it was over there and then.

I went on a date with another guy. He wasn't totally my type. But when he told me he had his own cat whom he adored, well this man was someone worth getting to know!

Never worked out in the end. But I know for sure that I must ask questions early on....hate cats?? No no no. Indifferent?? Maybe. Got your own cat who you love? Bring it on baby

OP posts:
macshoto · 22/09/2023 05:17

My DW was very much "love me, love my cats" when we started dating. I'd grown up with pet cats so this wasn't a problem at all, and her boy cat adopted me quite quickly.

We did have a negotiation about whether two long-haired cats in the bedroom was a good idea... the fluff everywhere got a bit much for me.

Has I not also been a 'cat person' we wouldn't be married now (17 years in).

Original poster
missingyears · 22/09/2023 05:24

@macshoto awww that is adorable x

OP posts:
macshoto · 22/09/2023 05:28

And I should add, I think the longest we have been without cats since is about 2 months as we mourned the last of one generation and contemplated whether we should try some time without.

ACertainKindOfLight · 22/09/2023 05:49

I have four cats and zero desire for a man, even if he liked cats he would be in our way and ruin our
routine. House is so much more peaceful just me and cats.

Loobyloo68 · 22/09/2023 06:56

If I had to shoot my cat or my husband, the husband would loose

WildFeathers · 22/09/2023 07:01

Ha ha! When I met my DH he told me he’d never own a cat. Now he says…please can we keep the number of cats we have to single figures 😹.

Laurama91 · 22/09/2023 07:13

We got a cat at the beginning of the year. Someone at work was trying to wind me up and said they had phoned my partner and told him to get rid of my cat. I told him I'd get rid of partner first. Told him on the night, he laughed and said he knows I would 😂

Worldgonecrazy · 22/09/2023 07:19

Sounds sensible. Who would want a partner that didn’t love cats? We just have one at the moment but are planning on living with several when we retire.

Toddlerteaplease · 22/09/2023 07:39

If someone didn't respect that my cats come as part of the package, then they disrespect me.

Beamur · 22/09/2023 07:43

I don't trust people who hate cats.
DH is a good cat Dad.

Allergictoironing · 22/09/2023 09:09

ACertainKindOfLight · 22/09/2023 05:49

I have four cats and zero desire for a man, even if he liked cats he would be in our way and ruin our
routine. House is so much more peaceful just me and cats.

This is me too (apart from only 2 cats). Twice I've been asked out for me to tell them there's only one man in my life. On being questioned further, I'd say "well his name is Linton, he's black..." cue shocks from racists nearby - "he's furry all over & 6 kg". When he was still with us, I couldn't have let anyone else in my bed because that's where we would snuggle up every morning & night & he was scared of other people.

My house is run for the convenience of the cats as is my routine. A man in my life would have to be VERY tolerant of this e.g. "sorry, it's 8:15 pm so supper time for cats", "nope, no morning cuddles as cats need breakfast", "you can't sit there, that's Girlcat's seat", "can't use the chair in the study right now because Tobias is sitting there" etc.

TBH I've had more joy and love from my cats than from any man, and apart from losing Boycat less heartbreak.

Clarich007 · 22/09/2023 09:21

My then boyfriend told me on our first date about his cat, and how much he loved him.
His school friend's cat got out and came back pregnant.He took one of the kittens, an all black one called him Scamp, and loved him unconditionally for 13 years.
51 years later, he's still soft as a brush about cats.
I knew he was a keeper !

Catsmere · 24/09/2023 08:30

I don't date and couldn't have a man in the house even if I wanted one (no room) but nobody who hates cats has any place in my life. I'm of the "if you hate cats I hate you" frame of mind. I make a point of telling care agencies that any workers they send round must be at least tolerant of cats, because my two will want to make friends and will jump on their laps, and since this tiny unit is their home and has nowhere I can lock them away, the workers had better get used to it. (Luckily most of them have been cat enthusiasts!) I have never been without at least one cat, and at one time had five, and I hope I stay fit and well enough never to have to be without them. I love my girls (currently zzzzzing on the bed next to me)more than any human. 😻😻

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