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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

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Original poster

Would we make good cat owners?

15 replies

PopadomPointer · 21/09/2019 11:44

After years of pleading DH has finally agreed to ‘consider’ us having a cat

However, he has a few rules...cat has to stay downstairs...would this be easily enforceable?

Our setup is 4 DC oldest 10 youngest 2, I’m a SAHM, we also have 2 dogs.

We would hopefully get a rescue...fully grown...have no desire for a kitten

One last thing, we live in a small town,would a rescue even consider us?

Thanks if you got this far

OP posts:

madcatladyforever · 21/09/2019 11:49

No awful, the dogs for a start and a 2 year old. It would have to be the most relaxed cat in the entire world.
It will turn round and scratch your toddler and probably bite as well if it pulls the cats tail.
As for keeping the cat downstairs that can only be enforced by a big door, cats don't give a shit about your rules.
Nothing wrong with a town as long as your house isn't on a main road but the cat would have to have escape routes i.e outside cat flap and tall furniture to relax on as they get stressed if they can't escape from kids/dogs.
It sounds like a recipe for disaster to me.

TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 21/09/2019 11:58

It's maybe not a great idea with the dogs unless the rescue place has cats used to dogs. But then again your dogs may not be used to cats and just chase them.

Everything else you could work around imo. But forget the cat not being allowed upstairs. As pp says, that can't be enforced except with a door that you remember to close every single time, that goes for the kids too!!

MustardScreams · 21/09/2019 12:01

You can’t train cats, they go where they want. Also if you have a toddler and 2 dogs the cat will need to go upstairs so it can have a safe place to get away from it all.

smartcarnotsosmartdriver · 21/09/2019 12:03

Depends on the cat. Some may be used to dogs and small children in which case you could be in luck. I don't think mine would take to a dog but in a couple of months they will be introduced to a baby. We live in a small town but on a busy road so the rescue we went to allowed us indoor cats. My mum lives in a quieter part of a small town so hers get out. I'd say it may take a while for the right cat to come up because of your requirements so you'll need to be patient.

AllTheGlitter · 21/09/2019 12:08

I don’t think you can keep the cat just downstairs, it won’t understand and mine loves sleeping on my bed all day!

My DSS (2) is fine with our cat, I always told DSS to be careful and showed him how to stroke the cat.

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 21/09/2019 12:12

I can't imagine how I would get my cat to stay downstairs. There must be a way though I suppose.

But then my very stroppy car would also be very upset to hear that I own her

Vinorosso74 · 21/09/2019 12:13

The dogs would be my main concern-how are they with cats?
A good rescue would want the whole household to meet the cat so that wouldn't stop you adopting. Where I volunteer they don't have any blanket rules of no kids; obviously some cats would be a no but quite a few come through who are very kid friendly. Are your kids used to cats?
No idea how you stop a cat getting upstairs without a door at the bottom of the stairs! It's also important for a cat to have a safe place to escape to if they want quiet time away from everyone so you would need to consider that.

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 21/09/2019 12:13

Oh and the dog thing isn't a problem here but the cat spends a lot of time outside so maybe that helps?

greensnail · 21/09/2019 12:20

Our cats when I was a child weren't allowed upstairs, we had no door at the bottom of the stairs but it was never a problem. I think we just prevented them going up there when they were new and they learnt not to go up.

ThatCurlyGirl · 21/09/2019 12:20

I haven't got a cat but according to my friends who do, they pretty much run the house!

With four kids under 10 and a dog already it might be too much to take on.

Maybe chat to a few local rescues before anything and they will be honest with you as to whether it's a set up that is appropriate for animals?

Lovely you want to give a cat a forever home but it sounds like a busy and potentially stressful environment for them.

The downstairs only rule won't be enforceable so if your other half won't budge on that I think it's a no go unfortunately.

viccat · 21/09/2019 13:17

Not sure how to put it so I'm just going to ask it - why do you want to get a cat? What are you hoping for?

Kids and dogs don't as such prevent anyone from getting a cat or cats as well but the staying downstairs rule is the biggest problem here. Because of the kids and dogs, you'll need a friendly, relaxed and confident cat but actually sounds like your household is already very busy and at the end of a busy day you'd then lock the cat away from the family downstairs... And the type of cat you need, loves human company and attention. I think it would encourage the cat to start spending more and more time outdoors and potentially even "move out" to live somewhere quieter or somewhere with more attention on offer, sorry.

And unless an internal door between upstairs and downstairs was always closed, it's actually not very practical anyway - cats can't be kept in an area with baby gates etc. like dogs can as they can jump and fit through small gaps.

It's lovely you want to get an adult rescue cat so I don't want to be too negative, I would just encourage you to consider who would benefit from this arrangement really?

YeOldeTrout · 21/09/2019 13:28

What are his concerns about cat being upstairs? It would easier to have a rule about staying out of certain rooms upstairs (presumably his own). Then you just keep the door closed and cat can still go to other rooms upstairs.

Small town.. why would this be a problem? Busy road would be a problem.

Not owners... Slaves. But you'll understand that soon enough.

ScreamingValenta · 21/09/2019 13:39

The dogs might or might not be an issue, depending on their personalities and that of the cat. Confining the cat downstairs is completely unrealistic, but you should be able to keep it out of certain rooms if you always shut the door from the outset so the cat doesn't form a habit of going there.

The cat will need a dog free space inside the house, however well it gets on with the dogs.

Your husband's reluctance about it would be my main concern. A pet should ideally be welcomed by all in the house - if some are completely indifferent that's OK - but any reluctance or resentment might end badly.

Fluffycloudland77 · 21/09/2019 13:43

It really doesn’t matter what he thinks, the cat will do as he pleases as soon as it gets it’s paws under the table anyway.

Get a girl so it can be daddies little princess.

Original poster

PopadomPointer · 21/09/2019 19:17

Thanks so much for all of the advice.
Lots to think about

OP posts:

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