My cat is a twat

[Nonstopbuttmachine]

I adopted a beautiful little four year old girl just before Christmas, she came from a single cat household and I worried about her fitting in with my two. They've accepted her however so all is well She's a feisty little madam and since moving in she's discovered her 'inner fire'. There's a public footpath at the back of my house where innocent people stroll along with their dogs; madam cat loves to chase them regardless of their size. She's scared off a huge Chow, a standard poodle and a husky

Her latest victim is a Greek guy who walks past every day with his little dog; she knows exactly what time he'll be passing so lies in wait and jumps out at them. The poor guy gets the fright of his life and swears really loudly

Twat cat then does the whole wide-eyed 'Ooh what did I dooo, I'm sooo tiny and cute...I can't possibly frighten anyone?' look It's a good job I love her 😹

Oh she sounds hilarious.
One of my old hideous neighbours had this nasty dog, bulldogish, he though he was all tough until my tiny tortie, Matilda hissed in his face.
The dog never bothered my cats again

All cats are twats.

It's the law.

We need photos...

In your face, bulldog!

It's getting to that time of evening I stupidly didn't think ahead and just gave the cats a tin of mackerel so of course they're all washing their paws arses

Twat cat has perked up though and is staring at the path from her balcony, she's not quite assumed her position yet

There's a cat we see on our way to school that winds up a staffy that's behind a gate, it waits till it's snoozing then sneaks through the railings and swipes his ears and runs off.dog goes ballistic, owner tells dog off.

I asked once turns out the cat is his neighbour and has been doing on in the regular for 6years

Cats are evil and fabulous

Poor staffy 😂

Mine used to lay in wait under a shrub and ambush the next door neighbours and their two Alsations. Then just trot off as if nothing had happened.

was very, very funny

This is twat cat in position, carefully monitoring the path from her vantage point. She was disappointed to see her 'brother' walking past

That sounds a great game, wish I could 'be more cat'!

I have 2 cats, they are not twats in the slightest and are so chilled out, they are doing cats a great disservice by not upkeeping the high twattish standards of cats' reputations.

Maybe place some ‘beware of twat cat’ signs nearby to warn passing dog walkers?

Believe it or not @Bookworm4 it's the law where I live to display a Beware of the Dog sign, even if you own a tiny chihuahua or Poodle! I need to design a 'Prosohi malaka gata' sign (beware of wanker cat) and watch the money roll in

You could be onto something 🤣🤣

She sounds great! We had a really soppy cat they saw off my mums friends German Shepard by scratching it on the nose.

We had a cat that used to hide under the hedge between us and next door, wait for the neighbour to come home then pounce out at her. Every day at about 4.30 we’d hear a scream from next door and say “ah, Jeanette’s home!” Thought it was hilarious until the little shit started doing it to me (cat, not the neighbour!)

These stories are brilliant, love how little cats can scare German shepherds/Alsations 😂😂

Bless her at least she is settling in haha. Can I just say also, she is such a beautiful colour!
I totally agree with beware of the cat, don't know where society gets the idea that cats are afraid of dogs, in my experience it is the other way around.
My brother in law brought his German Shepard over to our house once and it was cowering in the corner because our cat hissed at him. Too funny.

Brilliant
All cats are twats. Some are just more twattish than others.
I have a calico twat named Matilda who will take on anything. I think she has reached co- existence with the neighbour cat, after a scratched nose which she deserved. She will swipe and hiss at me, if I dare require her to do something she doesn't want to do, but is all cute and purry two minutes later. Damn cats.

One of DP's previous cats used to tease a couple of local dogs who were allowed out on leads in their gardens on nice days. Their leads used to allow them up to a foot from the gate. If they weren't within sight of the gate (it was a BIG garden) she used to go in and get them to chase her along the drive, then leap up onto the gate and walk back and forth while they did their raving nut a foot away.

He used go and take her off the gate saying "one day, you won;t make it to the gate first."

@Broken11Girl
Calico is the same as tortoise shell right?
Just mine is also called Matilda.